this post was submitted on 26 Feb 2024
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Programmer Humor

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[–] andyli 139 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)
[–] candyman337 24 points 1 year ago

Good ol' Bobby Tables

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[–] [email protected] 81 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Yes, I'll name my child parent. This will reverse the tree, vertically.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

It's Sims 2 all over again.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

And if they settle on they/them pronouns, you could have an inverted non-binary tree.

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[–] [email protected] 67 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What about Alice, Bob, and Eve?

[–] rockSlayer 36 points 1 year ago (2 children)

They're currently shaking hands and too busy to let us borrow their names

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I love you so much NullPointerException

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago

Oh no, we’ve lost NaN again!

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[–] iAvicenna 40 points 1 year ago (3 children)

fun fact elif is a legit girl name in Turkish

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

"Pointer, where are you?" Points at Parent, my other child

[–] over_clox 9 points 1 year ago

OOP issues LOL!

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Why no Ada or Janet? Or Haskell or Idris?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Ada is in fact named after a person, thus completing the circle.

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[–] alyth 32 points 1 year ago

Elif is a feminine Turkish name :)

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You know, OOP in Spanish translates as "Programación orientada a objetos" or POO in case you need it

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[–] Dehydrated 27 points 1 year ago

"Yo shut the fuck up Linked list, you're annoying as hell"

[–] mstrk 26 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A friend of mine named his dog Byte. The dog is very playful, and has the habit of running in the direction of other people he meets.

When the dog does that my friend tries to call him back shouting: "BYTE!! BYTE!!". People get really scared when this happens 😂

Okay, not so funny if you are the one being approached by the dog.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

That's probably a little unethical but the mental image is absolutely hilarious.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago

Little baby FORTRAN

[–] geogle 24 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Meet my kids, Sed and Awk.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

And my dog, Cat.

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[–] Asudox 22 points 1 year ago (4 children)

"child" seems to be enough. short and concise.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

“Slave” works too.

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[–] NegativeLookBehind 21 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Definitely naming my next dog Byte.

Edit: Petabyte!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

Ah yes Julia, an unreasonably effective name to give your child

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago

How could they forget Pascal :/

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Just name your child Linus like we all do...

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Just name the kid Basic, hardly worse than the Trahgedhieghs running around today

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

This reminded me I haven't heard from my uncle Foo Bar in a while. (He spells it Fubar)

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[–] shotgun_crab 14 points 1 year ago

Oh yes, OOP, the namest of names

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (2 children)

As a Python programmer I'll have to name my child Dictionary, of course.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (9 children)

Zig missing from the list is sad for very old meme reasons, too.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago
[–] Lemminary 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'm naming mine 1337Code jr

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[–] Alexstarfire 11 points 1 year ago

Nothing beats Bobby Tables.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I'm naming my mid Iron Python and there's nothing you can do to stop me.

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[–] bandwidthcrisis 10 points 1 year ago
[–] milliams 10 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I like "Vectoria".

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Naming ~~things~~ kids is the hardest part of programming.

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[–] AnAustralianPhotographer 9 points 1 year ago

World. Why? "Hello World".

[–] awake01 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] De_Narm 9 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Haskell? Curry? Maybe even Brooks.

[–] nifty 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Haskell is an awesome name for a baby

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