this post was submitted on 26 Feb 2024
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Programmer Humor

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[–] andyli 139 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (3 children)
[–] candyman337 24 points 5 months ago

Good ol' Bobby Tables

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[–] [email protected] 81 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Yes, I'll name my child parent. This will reverse the tree, vertically.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 months ago

It's Sims 2 all over again.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

And if they settle on they/them pronouns, you could have an inverted non-binary tree.

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[–] [email protected] 67 points 5 months ago (1 children)

What about Alice, Bob, and Eve?

[–] rockSlayer 36 points 5 months ago (2 children)

They're currently shaking hands and too busy to let us borrow their names

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I love you so much NullPointerException

[–] [email protected] 20 points 5 months ago

Oh no, we’ve lost NaN again!

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[–] iAvicenna 40 points 5 months ago (3 children)

fun fact elif is a legit girl name in Turkish

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (4 children)

"Pointer, where are you?" Points at Parent, my other child

[–] over_clox 9 points 5 months ago

OOP issues LOL!

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Why no Ada or Janet? Or Haskell or Idris?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Ada is in fact named after a person, thus completing the circle.

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[–] alyth 32 points 5 months ago

Elif is a feminine Turkish name :)

[–] [email protected] 28 points 5 months ago (1 children)

You know, OOP in Spanish translates as "Programación orientada a objetos" or POO in case you need it

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[–] Dehydrated 27 points 5 months ago

"Yo shut the fuck up Linked list, you're annoying as hell"

[–] mstrk 26 points 5 months ago (1 children)

A friend of mine named his dog Byte. The dog is very playful, and has the habit of running in the direction of other people he meets.

When the dog does that my friend tries to call him back shouting: "BYTE!! BYTE!!". People get really scared when this happens 😂

Okay, not so funny if you are the one being approached by the dog.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 months ago

That's probably a little unethical but the mental image is absolutely hilarious.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 5 months ago

Little baby FORTRAN

[–] geogle 24 points 5 months ago (4 children)

Meet my kids, Sed and Awk.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 5 months ago

And my dog, Cat.

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[–] Asudox 22 points 5 months ago (4 children)

"child" seems to be enough. short and concise.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 months ago

“Slave” works too.

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[–] NegativeLookBehind 21 points 5 months ago
[–] [email protected] 21 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Definitely naming my next dog Byte.

Edit: Petabyte!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 5 months ago

Ah yes Julia, an unreasonably effective name to give your child

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 months ago

How could they forget Pascal :/

[–] [email protected] 16 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Just name the kid Basic, hardly worse than the Trahgedhieghs running around today

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

Just name your child Linus like we all do...

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

This reminded me I haven't heard from my uncle Foo Bar in a while. (He spells it Fubar)

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[–] shotgun_crab 14 points 5 months ago

Oh yes, OOP, the namest of names

[–] [email protected] 14 points 5 months ago (2 children)

As a Python programmer I'll have to name my child Dictionary, of course.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 months ago (9 children)

Zig missing from the list is sad for very old meme reasons, too.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 months ago
[–] Alexstarfire 11 points 5 months ago

Nothing beats Bobby Tables.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago (3 children)

I'm naming my mid Iron Python and there's nothing you can do to stop me.

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[–] Lemminary 11 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I'm naming mine 1337Code jr

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[–] bandwidthcrisis 10 points 5 months ago
[–] milliams 10 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I like "Vectoria".

[–] AnAustralianPhotographer 9 points 5 months ago

World. Why? "Hello World".

[–] awake01 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)
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[–] De_Narm 9 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Haskell? Curry? Maybe even Brooks.

[–] nifty 12 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Haskell is an awesome name for a baby

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Naming ~~things~~ kids is the hardest part of programming.

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