this post was submitted on 25 Nov 2024
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TIL lol

This is from a group chat I was in and a female friend asked the group

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[–] Catma 106 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

This is brilliant.

[–] toofpic 49 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I like that this man stretches the balls first, and then makes a transaction with a bartender.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

And then poors the drink while holding the spread nut sack? Fucking talented fellow. A real catch.

[–] MissJinx 37 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] FelixCress 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] MissJinx 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

I'm very open minded person, I think other peoples lifes are not my business and they can do whatever they want... BUT sometimes the youth make me feel like my grandma when she heard we could kiss someone without dating them. This post made me an old person horrified with the youth culture lol

[–] HootinNHollerin 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I can tell you that the person in the text is like 45yo swinger

[–] MissJinx 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Why the straw though, what's wrong with lapping it up like a cat?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

I took it like she's tryna fuck but isn't that into the guy.

[–] FelixCress 8 points 1 month ago (3 children)

She may end up with a dick in her eye.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

My life would have been better not havimg suun diS

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Fella had a stroke right there

[–] mhague 13 points 1 month ago (3 children)

He was monkey pawed out of existence as he typed

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Is this for like a seniors club? Don't feel like this is really very feasible unless you are over 50.

[–] Nutteman 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Ive always had more scrote than nut

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Then why isn't your name Scrotteman?

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

I used to make these in the bathtub all the time as a kid.

[–] over_clox 13 points 1 month ago (9 children)
[–] wreckedcarzz 23 points 1 month ago

large, preferably yellow

lol

reads the rest

jfc I'm out

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago

That's enough internet for today. ಠ_ಠ

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (2 children)

That's a bit much, I'll stick to the Rusty Trombone

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago

Yeah but people actually do that, as opposed to the edgy preteen nonsense above

[–] hOrni 5 points 1 month ago

For many years, my friends and I went to music festivals as The Rusty Trombone camp. We had a nice banner, people took photos of it. Unfortunately some asshole stole it one year when we weren't looking, and I don't have the patience to make another one. I'll post a picture if I find it.

[–] FelixCress 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's actually properly awful.

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[–] 33550336 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Finally, something not depressing on Lemmy 🤝🏼

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

you don't wanna hear about elephant shower

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago
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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Wouldn't this like... Hurt??

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I assume you don't have a scrotum to test for yourself, but oddly it wouldn't hurt at all.

The balls are ultra sensitive, but for some reason the scrote itself just laughs in the face of danger. You can pinch the shit out of it and feel nothing. Just pinching random arm skin hurts a lot quicker than pinching the ol ballsack. And stretching? Forget about it. That's the thing's whole job.

just keep the actual plumbing clear of the carnage

[–] AFKBRBChocolate 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I don't think they're asking about the stretching, but about having a puddle of alcohol on your scrotum. That was my first thought as well. Probably okay if it's wine, but not sure about something high proof.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I was actually asking about the stretching more so than having alcohol down there. Well, TIL

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Maybe if you do it with a Bloody Mary because of the ~~tobacco~~ Tobasco sauce or have a cut on your nuts.

[–] Fuckfuckmyfuckingass 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"Tobacco Sauce". That's what I'll start calling my morning loogies.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Fucking autocorrect. I didn't even notice lol

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Why does this need to be a thing? I know it is, but people, seriously. Get on with life.

[–] maxenmajs 7 points 1 month ago

I'm not into that kind of club scene but they seem to be enjoying their lives. I approve.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Lemmy is full of the brightest armchair experts who know the correct path to change the world.

Lemmy is also this post and people commenting, “brilliant!”

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I mean, considering teabagging is already a thing, is this really that bad? Probably less gross than naval shots. Nobody has a clean naval for long, and clubbing is done at the end of the day, and involves dancing and sweating.

The straw's weird though. Just lap it up.

[–] tomi000 17 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Drinking from a guys sweaty nuts? Thats def waaay geosser than navel shots

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I dunno, honestly, I clean both daily and yet it's my navel that gets linty and full of chunks of dead skin far faster, can't imagine it's any less sweaty, either

Then again I shave my balls with a straight razor every day like a real man (this is actually the test to prove manhood, sorry anyone who doesn't, I didn't make the rules) so maybe I'm picturing less gross balls because of that

[–] Nutteman 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

My girlfriend is an aesthetician and waxes my boys on a regular semi-weekly schedule. Always perfect, no nicks. Still painful to achieve maximum manliness, but smoother and lasts longer. Look at what you have to do to achieve a fraction of my power.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

It's only grosser because of the sexual context, I think. Just straight bacteria, crud, detritus, et cetera, naval grosses me out way more.

All that said, I have gargled balls before (and enjoyed it), so probably not the most objective.

Then again, I've also done naval and body shots off bartenders, so... 🤷‍♂️

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