You, too, can have an ass like that. Squats and lunges will get that booty popping before you know it. Or if a squat rack isn't feasible, booty bands are also really effective. I rely on those when I don't have access to a rack.
And then make sure to get your protein for your growing booty. Vanilla or strawberry flavored whey protein in whole milk is fucking delicious. With how good that tastes, there's no reason you can't get enough nutrients.

Hopefully this helps! Everyone deserves a juicy ass.

[–] PopcornPrincess 53 points 4 months ago

Boy that was bootyful advice, thank you.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 4 months ago (13 children)

Any advice for non-dairy protein? Lactose intolerant, and the people using the equipment after me would very much prefer if I didn't shit myself 😅

[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 months ago

Whey protein isolate. I am also lactose intolerant and while this is slightly more expensive than the most commonly sold whey protein concentrate it prevents the daily pants shitting that concentrate would cause, so it's super worth the extra 5-10 bucks.

[–] bzz 12 points 4 months ago

Orgain vegan is my preferred protein. I like the simple one that is much harder to find

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 months ago

I know you have been given answers already, but look for any Vegan protein. If you want protein powder for example, the vegan ones are usually made of pea protein rather than whey, completely eliminating the risk of shitting yourself from the protein.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I am tempted even if thiccer cheeks would probably adversly affect my climbing abilities.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 months ago

Just use your ass to climb, problem solved.

[–] captainlezbian 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Or get a bicycle. Nobody has an ass like a cyclist

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[–] LordCrom 10 points 4 months ago

No squat rack, Go Rocky IV style. Grab 2 bags of potting soil over each shoulder and squat away. Grab a few gallons of water, bonus grip strength while squatting.

While drive a mile to the gym to run a mile on a treadmill?

[–] ObviouslyNotBanana 13 points 4 months ago

Pad those cheeks

[–] franklin 65 points 4 months ago (3 children)

I have a pair of sweatpants that looks almost like a pair my wife has and I put it on by accident and I was like did I get super fat overnight?

Bottom line I have a big ass and my wife liked it. Context I'm 6' 2" and she's 4' 11"

[–] [email protected] 139 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I'm 6'2" and she's 4’11"

[–] franklin 69 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

Holy fuck, My wife and I died laughing at this.

[–] maniclucky 36 points 4 months ago

I'm in a doctor's office and trying so hard not to disturb everyone around me and it's not going well.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 months ago

Glad to be of service

[–] UnderpantsWeevil 50 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Bottom line I have a big ass and my wife liked it.

[–] franklin 29 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

I wish I had as much raw Charisma as "A Bug With A Big Ass"

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago

Everybody that reads this: Go subscribe to Dropout

[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 months ago

I think you just rediscovered yoga pants

[–] [email protected] 54 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

when i was very young, men would wear booty shorts and belly shirts like some women do now; publicly shirtless men was also more common; and, as an adult, i wish i could have appreciated it more than i did at the time.

i hate that prudery has become so en vogue these days with the young.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 4 months ago (12 children)

how do you keep it from dangling out the leg?

[–] [email protected] 40 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Short

[–] AnIntenseMoist 32 points 4 months ago

Your Greek ancestors would be proud, king.

[–] Huschke 36 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Have a small dick.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 months ago (1 children)

✂️

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[–] AeonFelis 34 points 4 months ago

[–] [email protected] 24 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Tape it back 😋

[–] Asudox 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

A mere tape won't hold back my random, but strong erection.

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 4 months ago

ooh fancy pants bigger than 2" dick mcgee over here

[–] quafeinum 23 points 4 months ago

Let it breathe. Assert dominance

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Boxer briefs, trunks, briefs, thong, or jockstrap.

Pretty much any underwear except for boxer shorts.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 months ago

Tucking, or if that's uncomfortable, some people have success with underwear that's just a size down from their regular.

[–] RagingRobot 9 points 4 months ago (1 children)

That defeats the whole point of the shorts. The world wants to see that little guy!

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 months ago

Then why do I have so many restraining orders against me?

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[–] [email protected] 36 points 4 months ago (3 children)

My dysphoria would never allow me to wear something like that. I can't stand anything that reminds me that I'm built like a fridge and look like I'm cosplaying a Sasquatch with alopecia.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 4 months ago (1 children)

No one wants my fatty hairy thighs peaking out from shorts like that.

[–] dejected_warp_core 21 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Recently, I learned that a (female) friend of mine has what can only be described as a body hair fetish. As in, "you're not hairy enough for my taste," level of fetish. You might be surprised.

[–] nomous 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

A coworker just told me last week she favored really hairy, kind of dirty manual labor type guys and I don't really think its rare. It takes all kinda to make the world go 'round.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 4 months ago (9 children)

I just want to know why men can't have stretchy comfy pants like women do.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Just become a dentist, have a midlife crisis, and start riding a bike.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 months ago

How about my 2" covers you inseam?

sorry

[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 months ago

There's a clip somewhere of a gay guy looking direct to camera saying with that basically-clapping-between-words flamboyant energy:

"Straight men! The women you want to sleep with, want to see your thighs!"

I can never find it so the quote might not be perfect but it really stuck with me. I joked about it to my SO and she gave one of those moany approval noises meaning like "so true" so I guess the man was right.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago

Booty booty booty booty booty booty shorts

[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 months ago (2 children)

https://a.co/d/09ZVcEdq the uratot 'store' has no https so sorry for the amazon link

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