this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2024
540 points (98.9% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

27303 readers
3753 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
all 40 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] simplejack 106 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)
[–] jordanlund 83 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Fluffy_Ruffs 19 points 2 weeks ago

An absolute classic.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

You're talking about the world's foremost analrapist.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

What is this supposed to be?

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago

"a new start"

But when it's coming from the world's first analyst/therapist (AKA "analrapist"), who can tell...

[–] Maalus 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

"A new start" but with "nu" instead od new because too few letters

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Oh thanks. I'd have never guessed

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

I’m ready for a lot that’s new

[–] winkly 37 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] TheTechnician27 103 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Benjaben 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Still, I would've been disappointed if someone hadn't just typed it out. Probably woulda felt like I had to.

[–] ByteJunk 2 points 2 weeks ago

Alternatively, they may be complaining about the typo...

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago

And yet the DMV wouldn't let me get "CUMKING" smh

[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

This implies the existence of jizz serfs

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

You've met my ex's?

[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

JisLorD

Is "J" equal to "L" or "D"?

[A] J=L

[B] J=D

Algebra Class here we go again with these fucking variables.

Car must belong to a math teacher.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Nah clearly it's a truth table

L    |    D    |    J = L V D
1    |    1    |    1
1    |    0    |    1
0    |    1    |    1
0    |    0    |    0
[–] sunbrrnslapper 17 points 2 weeks ago

It is right up there with ANUSTART.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

we need a vieweaskeriverse community

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago

I don't get it. What's wrong with a Java Industrial Standard Library Object Relational Database?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

jeremiah?

no.. he was a bullfrog.

[–] aeronmelon 8 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Are you sure that they didn’t mean it as “Jiz Lord”?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago

(I think that's the joke)

[–] Sam_Bass 7 points 2 weeks ago

Guess Sircumalot didn't fit

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Jizzlord, came 3 days after getting poled? Well hung, massive woody? I am so sorry for these awful jokes.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago

Nailed hard, women wept for days afterward

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] SmoothLiquidation 3 points 2 weeks ago

That show was surprisingly good.

[–] son_named_bort 4 points 2 weeks ago

Cum they told me for rum a bum bum

[–] jordanlund 4 points 2 weeks ago

I haven't felt this warm and fuzzy since everone was wearing those "What Would Jordan Do?" bracelets!

Thanks guys!

[–] Prethoryn 3 points 2 weeks ago

My name must start with a J. I can needed that boost of confidence

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

[Looks down the street] Everyone run, he's cumming!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Merry jismas, everyone

[–] TheLastOfHisName 1 points 2 weeks ago

Uuuuh...dude....?