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Oh, you guys are thinking small.

Peter Executive (a vassal of Andy CEO). Mary Anesthesiologist. Alice S. Theorist. William Credit Authorizer. James M. Researcher.

The worst part is that, fun as this is, I'm having flashbacks of every time I've said something along the lines of "Matt from HR" and realizing that's how that has always worked.

No one at school was picked on more than Timmy OnlyFans.

We all remember Scam Bankrupt Fraud, right?

Peter Unemployed.

Shameless pluck for "Qualityland" by Mark-Uwe Kling.

Look at me, I'm Bobby SitAtMyConputerAllDayAndAgeRapidly

Finally an accurate description for Jessica Fullstack Developer.

Just ask Tim Apple how that feels.

Imagine being the actual John Gamer.

Hello, I am Bob Bugmaker, your software developer for this project.

Etymology nerd on YouTube has a video on this! It's basically how we put people in our phones now, such as Alex (neighbor) and Alex (work), two names I actually have saved in my phone. They're more based on relationship than occupation now.

Edit: (neighbor) not (phone)

María Tiktoker

John Uberdriver

Sam Gamereviewer

Hi my name is Colin Support

Dolores del BullshitJob. Or Lola Shitposta.

I'd be Jimbo Bomber.
A lot cooler sounding than my real name.
I'm an industrial radiographer and usually called bombers.

In the case of coppers it would be pretty convenient since they all go by their surname so they would all be, "Officer Pig", "Sergeant Pig", "Inspector Pig", "Detective Pig"

“Sup, I’m Lance Crypto!”

Elon Nepobabyoligarchson.

Dick Doctor Patrick Porn Star Caroline Creator Dan Designer Evan Entertainment Ian Importer Tim Apple

Ohh no look out, it's Tim Moderator

Kailey Influencer

🤮

The names Trent, Trent Shippinrecieven.

Please see the excellent book "Jennifer Government" for a prescient look at where things are heading.

can someone help me make "janitor" sound like a fancy French name pls

The Management clan is huge.

And in 2027 there was a mass culling of the Private-Equity clan, when the revolution declared the entire family outlaw and they were hunted to the last junior.

It was ordained that the name of Private-Equity should be altogether abolished, and that the whole persons of that clan should renounce their name and take them some other name, and that they nor none of their posterity should call themselves Private-Equity or Investor under pain of death

Imagine Tony Head of Sales and Managment