this post was submitted on 22 Oct 2024
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submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by [email protected] to c/asklemmy
 

Typical two pieces of bread with something inside.

I think 9 bites, unfortunately with only one bite in the centre being crustless.

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[–] amzd 59 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Americans really will use any measurement before touching the metric system

[–] lohky 11 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Just like the misattributed Churchill quote :

You can trust the Americans to do the right thing, after they tried everything else.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (2 children)

... what would the metric unit be? 🤔

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 weeks ago

honestly number of bites in a sandwich sounds like a volume measurement, so cubic centimeters or litres would be metric units used for this

[–] cheese_greater 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

We'll make an exception this time 👩‍⚖️

[–] over_clox 34 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Well, there are 8 bits in a byte, so there must be 8 bites in a sammich, obviously.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] over_clox 8 points 1 month ago

Each bit is an ingredient.

2 bits bread

1 bit ham

1 bit cheese

1 bit lettuce

1 bit tomato

1 bit pickles

1 bit mayonnaise

So when you divide it all out, it's only 8 bites.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Checks out, at least if you represent the string "sandwich" in ASCII.

[–] rain_worl 2 points 1 month ago

in 8-bit ascii

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Zero, you take bites, the sandwich never has any.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

If someone left a bite in my sandwich I'd be very upset.

[–] triptrapper 4 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

And where am I taking them from, smarty pants?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 weeks ago

The same place your lap goes when you stand up

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It would appear to be approximately 2,982,609 bytes.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

I prefer my sandwich tar.xz compressed over .zip

[–] hperrin 8 points 1 month ago

Bro, nibble the crust first, then there are so many glorious crustless bites. Or just cut it off.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I normally do a ton of nibbles. What's the conversion rate of nibbles to bites? And are chomps just a US unit of measurement?

[–] SpaceNoodle 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

A nibble, four bits, is half a byte, eight bits.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Doing everything to dogde the metric system 🇺🇸🦅

[–] SpaceNoodle 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The Internet was never the same after Europe adopted the 10-bit metric byte.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

This would make for an awesome Cyberpunk TTRPG setting… an evil villain letting free a virus that transforms every bit into a 10-bit metric byte. Items being unusable unless decoded, etc.

[–] NeoNachtwaechter 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

All units that use body parts are US ones.

[–] SpaceNoodle 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

How many foreskins is that?

[–] NeoNachtwaechter 1 points 1 month ago

Your size or mine?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I quite like the crust, but could you not slice the crust off? That would likely improve the bread to crust ratio considerably.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 weeks ago

I like crust too though

[–] 10_0 6 points 1 month ago
[–] JWBananas 4 points 1 month ago

All of them.

I'm sorry.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Bread comes in too many different shapes and sizes for this to have a universal answer.

[–] Knitwear 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

12:

Corner bite - a balance of crust and content, a display of delayed gratification

Good bite - because you did so well delaying your gratification

Corner bite - because you hope the richness of The Good Bite will transfer somewhat

Navigating the last corner:

  • Rotate for a heavily crust>content corner bite - the build up

  • Deliberately smaller, last of the crust bite - the set up

Last Good Bite - smaller than The Good Bite but, equally, aren't you clever

X 2

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Cut your sandwich into triangles. This gives you 4x good bites & 8x corner bites without size differences.

[–] Resol 4 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

How big are your bites? The number of bites a sandwich has depends on their size.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Normal i think.

My wife is 12 to 15 bites though

[–] Resol 1 points 3 weeks ago

If your wife is a living sandwich, then... PLEASE don't eat her, unless you have a cloning machine and wanna eat the clone or something.

[–] RedditWanderer 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

(Ingredients-1)^2^ +2

[–] Death_Equity 3 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

How can there be -3 bites in a sandwich?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

You eat the sandwich in 9 bites. Then you vomit back up the sandwich plus 12 bites of the last thing you ate

[–] Death_Equity 2 points 1 month ago

You dropped it or it was stolen by a magpie or gull before you finished.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

I would agree with this. The rational part of me likes to try and eat a sandwich in a 3x3 grid of bites, right-to-left, working my way downward.

But, I'm a wacky, inconsistent li'l bitch, so it almost never works out that way. But, I don't think I ever exceed 12 bites. That's a pretty solid ballpark range.

[–] Presi300 3 points 1 month ago

I didn't know sandwiches can bite

[–] AgentGrimstone 3 points 4 weeks ago

I can finish in 5, 4 if I put in a little effort, 2 if I really need to.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

What if the bread is... Not square?

[–] cheese_greater 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

From now on, 25. I actually wish there was bread that had the dividing lines

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