this post was submitted on 18 Oct 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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[–] [email protected] 143 points 1 month ago (9 children)

You add tiny, mini, useless balconies so that you can check off another tick box on a zillow or trulia search, justify an increased rental cost.

Then you make the balconies as small as possible, as featureless as possible, and throw a whole bunch of rules into your rental agreement that prevent you from actually using them for basically any reason: Can't smoke on the balcony, can't dry clothes on it, can't cook on it, can't display any thing like a flag or banner on the balcony because of some made up aesthetic code, etc.

I've lived in a lot of different apartments of differing quality and location, and while I'm not saying that modern apartment residential balconies are entirely a scam, they very often are.

[–] FuglyDuck 58 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Can’t smoke on the balcony,

Because that smoke goes into other people's apartments. People who may not also be smokers or may have asthma or other medical conditions in which 2nd hand smoke is bad. not actually a building choice... most states now bar smoking inside or near a multi-unit residential building.

can’t dry clothes on it,

19 states have some form of "right to dry" legislation, most of which would protect drying on patio space.

can’t cook on it,

usually a matter of firecode. where I am, it's illegal to have wood burning fire pits or charcoal grills, but gas grills are fine. Also, turkey friers.

These rules are because people are stupid and have caused apartment fires numerous times with these things. can you use charcoal safely? sure. Also, another reason smoking is generally illegal. there's always that one smoker that forgets to clear out the ashtray every so often and that catches fire. (or they put a tissue in it or something, and that's not at all fire retardant.)

can’t display any thing like a flag or banner on the balcony because of some made up aesthetic code, etc.

not actually legal. if there's a residential building code that bans political speech (banners, flags, etc) then that's a first amendment violation. The apartment can (maybe) ban things in their contract agreement, but that's not a building code. that's a contract agreement, and as long as it's not exactly graphic, it probably falls into the "unenforceable" category.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

19 states have some form of “right to dry” legislation, most of which would protect drying on patio space.

Two points which I would like to interject here:

  1. OP (of either the post or comment above) may not be in the United States, and

  2. Even if they are, there are 50 states and 1 capital district. That means those 19 states only make up roughly a third of the United States. Odds are they are not in one of them.

[–] FuglyDuck 13 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

Fair enough.

though, my understanding is that the opposition to clotheslines is a mostly US thing. Especially in places where the weather is warm year-round. (specifically its the HOA's because HOA's are the devil.)

edit: also, there's no state here that forbids the practice. (there may be cities that do, but I imagine those are in places like... florida. Government small enough to fit in your backyard.)

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

though, my understanding is that the opposition to clotheslines is a mostly US thing. Especially in places where the weather is warm year-round.

That's fair. I'm not personally knowledgeable about said rules; I just thought I'd point out those couple things.

(specifically its the HOA’s because HOA’s are the devil.)

Agreed. I would say they need to go fuck themselves with a cactus, but really now. What did the cactus ever do to deserve that?

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

that’s a first amendment violation

It is a first amendment violation when THE STATE and ONLY THE STATE restricts your expression. You can absolutely have your expression restricted by private agreements that you willingly enter into.

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[–] Anticorp 6 points 1 month ago

My friend had a balcony so small that one person had to crab walk out sideways and then a second person could stand in front of the door. We still stood out there and smoked though. The view was nice.

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[–] [email protected] 70 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

In some places that is a strategy to satisfy zoning requirements. The builder has to provide a minimum amount of outdoor area per dwelling unit. They could create a large ground-level courtyard, or they can create a bunch of tiny balconies that sum up to the same total area. The ~~ladder~~ latter strategy allows a larger building to exist on the same lot.

Edit: Stupid voice-to-text always gets me.

[–] kamenlady 24 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I approve of the ladder strategy. Work those legs!

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)
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[–] Lost_My_Mind 6 points 1 month ago

God damn, son! I'm only on the 63rd floor! How big is this ladder???

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Maybe a way to make use of all those unused balconies. I’m on board.

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[–] halcyoncmdr 10 points 1 month ago (4 children)

A different design other than a basic box would allow them to make a large outdoor area at basically any level they want, not necessarily the ground, but that's of course more expensive as well.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I think people value private outdoor space differently than public outdoor space. I don't actually have a balcony but I think I would usually prefer a private space to a public one, even if the public one was much nicer.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

It helps a lot if the balcony is somewhat enclosed. The balconies that are just iron fences with no privacy at all are basically useless.

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[–] visnae 62 points 1 month ago

97% of the time, the average car just sits in the parking space, taking up space not being used.

I guess you can say something similar applied to balconies. They are probably being used, but only a small portion of the day.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Counterexample. We love our little balcony. We have some plants, a bench, and a hummingbird feeder. We take our coffee out there for 'cocktail hour' at 7, and sit, talk, watch the world go by a few floors down, and enjoy each other's company.

If you're not using your balcony, you really should.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

yess we have a similar situation!! i was under the impression EVERYONE used their balconies!

[–] blackbirdbiryani 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

There are a tonne of apartment balconies that are just afterthoughts by the developer though. I see plenty that are narrow to the point of being useless, or 30 floors up with no enclosed overhang which just generally feels kinda terrifying.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago (1 children)

So pot plants have somewhere to die

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[–] daggermoon 19 points 1 month ago (2 children)

You couldn't pay me to go out on a balcony if it's higher than 1 story. Fuck heights.

[–] WoahWoah 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I had a friend that was drunk and was smoking and leaning back on a balcony and went over. No one even heard him. One minute he was there, the next minute he was gone. No one even looked down for a few minutes because people were regularly coming and going from the balcony and people just assumed he went back inside.

Broke both his arms, his neck, fucked up his back, and had a major concussion. I think maybe he broke some ribs too. Really fucked him up. He didn't die, but the head injury caused a dramatic personality change and the neck and back stuff created chronic pain.

Another guy I knew intentionally jumped off a dorm balcony and severely and multiply fractured both his legs and fucked his knees forever.

Don't... uh, accidentally drop from great heights, people.

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[–] Smoogs 17 points 1 month ago

For smokers

[–] someguy3 16 points 1 month ago (4 children)

People want the option to use their balcony. Then they realize it's usually not so pleasant being exposed like that to the sun, wind, temp.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago (3 children)

... or just 'exposed'. to neighbors, passers-by, and the pervert in the corner office across the street.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Heh, I walk around naked with the blinds open because where I live, people would need binoculars to see me and if they choose to, their resulting suffering is their own fault. One advantage of being unattractive...

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

I was annoyed at this local news investigation about a high rise neighbor complaining about another walking around naked with the blinds open. They had footage blured out but when you saw them talk with the "irate" neighbor you could tell they must of had to have put the camera right up to the window. Its like wtf you see the guy because your pressing you face against your glass to get a look. No way you see him if you casually hanging in your place.

[–] 200ok 5 points 1 month ago

There's definitely a guy in the building across from me that stares. I don't think he's a creep -- he's probably just bored and looking around -- but his face is pressed up against the window so he stands out. I've made eye contact a few times, ugh.

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[–] 200ok 8 points 1 month ago

Agreed! They're always filthy/dusty and annoying to clean.

And even though no one gives a shit enough to stare, it's hard not to feel... watched.

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[–] MissJinx 16 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I use mine! Actually I made sure to.look for an apartment with a balcony since I have pets

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I don't sit on my balcony despite the table and chairs I have out there, but I have lots of plants that soften the view and spark joy. It's also a place the firefighters could pluck me from.

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[–] NeoNachtwaechter 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Maybe in order to give each resident the same chance to jump?

/s

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[–] udon 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Depends on where you live. In Japan, most of the time it's either way too hot to hang out on the balcony or way too cold. In Europe it's fine in many places for most of the year.

Some of it also has to do with rent prices which can be higher if you have a balcony.

Also, and again in Japan: There is an emergency balcony exit in some apartment buildings in case a natural disaster hits. It's probably easier to climb your way down a bunch of balconies with holes in the ground than a blank wall

[–] forgotaboutlaye 7 points 1 month ago

I live in Berlin, and while I don't have a balcony myself, I spend a lot of time enviously starring at my neighbours that do, as they use them quite a bit.

[–] Anticorp 14 points 1 month ago

There aren't many smokers anymore, and small apartment balconies were usually used for smoking.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

As someone who can barely approach the edge of a 3-story parking structure, I would come unraveled on one of those balconies.

[–] toynbee 7 points 1 month ago

Three stories? You're a brave soul.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

As a counterexample, look at the Marina City towers in Chicago (aka the corncobs); all of the units have balconies, and the balconies are definitely a selling point. They're quite large; in the case of the studios, the balcony can be nearly as large as the living space. (I think that I recently saw a nearly all original condo in Marina City go up for sale in the mid $400s? It was an interesting time capsule.)

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[–] wabafee 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

It's for emergency exit.

/s

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

That's funny. I see all the skyscrapers around here with balconies and I get jealous, but I never thought about the fact that I almost never see people on those balconies until I read your question.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (7 children)
[–] IMALlama 7 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Except BBQs are often against fire code so they're not allowed 😭

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[–] thonofpy 7 points 1 month ago

They are not human friendly.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

The bigger ones are great for parties but that's not an everyday event

[–] punkwalrus 6 points 1 month ago

I find them too windy and noisy half the time. They are also wet half the time, either from condensation or recent rain.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

I use mine to play Civ

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