this post was submitted on 14 Nov 2024
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[–] FlyingSquid 203 points 2 months ago

I was hoping for Cards Against Humanity to do it, but this is just as good.

[–] khannie 187 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I initially thought this was going to be an onion article, but here we are. Class.

[–] [email protected] 111 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] hemmes 38 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago (1 children)

it's hosted on the onion, and i'm unsure if I'm eating it.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

"...they [Infowars] strive to make life both scarier and longer for everyone, a commendable goal."

What a fantastic read.

[–] Theprogressivist 142 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Man, the Onion really is a national treasure.

[–] Viking_Hippie 32 points 2 months ago

It's America's Finest News Source!

[–] danc4498 109 points 2 months ago

As for the vitamins and supplements, we are halting their sale immediately. Utilitarian logic dictates that if we can extend even one CEO's life by 10 minutes, diluting these miracle elixirs for public consumption is an unethical waste. Instead, we plan to collect the entire stock of the InfoWarswarehouses into a large vat and boil the contents down into a single candy bar–sized omnivitamin that one executive (I will not name names) may eat in order to increase his power and perhaps become immortal.

[–] [email protected] 87 points 2 months ago

Honestly using Infowars to raise awareness of gun violence in a satirical way with help from Everytown is such a middle finger to Alex Jones and I'm all here for it

[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod 75 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)

I'm a little worried that, like the Colbert Report, the weirdos won't realize we're making fun of them.

[–] FlyingSquid 53 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod 35 points 2 months ago (2 children)

It'll be fucking hilarious but it's not gonna break them out of their bubble. Not even if they give a speech at the White House Correspondent's Dinner, assuming we ever have one again.

[–] FlyingSquid 32 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I don't know that they can be broken out at this point. We've reached near-Heaven's Gate levels. They just haven't all drank the poison at the orders of Dear Leader yet.

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[–] shalafi 8 points 2 months ago

They still have the dinner, Trump just doesn't go.

[–] TOModera 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That's an honest question. There was a recent F.D. signifier video on edgewood films and if satire works or not.

To save you an hour: While yes, satire is funny and informative for those of us on the left, and they show a great degree of well made art which you should enjoy, those who support what's being satired aren't impacted. Rather they ignore the overall message and cheer on the negative aspects being made fun off. Which wouldn't be a problem if it didn't amp up terrible aspects (violence against marginalized groups, for instance) and thus end up getting people hurt and/or killed.

[–] FlyingSquid 8 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I don't know that a YouTube video is the best way to determine that. I'd like to see some peer-reviewed evidence.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

Agreed, but it's still a good watch. . He has a relevant degree (sociology?) and was a social worker for a while so his perspective is still worthwhile.

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[–] AbouBenAdhem 17 points 2 months ago

If nothing else, it’s diverting views and revenue from whatever genuine right-wing media they’d be watching otherwise.

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[–] [email protected] 66 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Beautiful! I can't wait to see what they do with this. They could even do what Fox does and just repeat Onion articles on Info Wars, and then report InfoWars nonsense on the Onion.

I guess the guy that bought the Onion was actually being honest about loving it and letting it grow.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 months ago

They brought back the paper edition of the Onion and also gave the writers more freedom to write random shit. It sounds like they liked what The Onion was and want to make more of it.

[–] Balthazar 43 points 2 months ago

How wonderfully appropriate!

[–] Viking_Hippie 43 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The Onion’s parent company, Global Tetrahedron

Eee! They named the parent company after the evil corporation parent company in The Onion Movie! That makes me unreasonably happy! 😂🥰

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 months ago

It was originally created for the satire book Our Dumb Century: The Onion Presents 100 Years of Headlines from America's Finest News Source

This is some next level meta.

[–] [email protected] 42 points 2 months ago

Through it all, InfoWars has shown an unswerving commitment to manufacturing anger and radicalizing the most vulnerable members of society—values that resonate deeply with all of us at Global Tetrahedron.

[–] splount 42 points 2 months ago

This is the most patriotic thing I've heard in quite some time!

[–] DandomRude 40 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

I hope they didn't pay more than a sack of onions.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I hope it's a lot. The money here is going to the families of Sandy Hook victims. There isn't nearly enough to cover the full court ordered payout, but it's essentially a donation to them with extra steps.

[–] DandomRude 21 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

I know, but why should someone other than Jones pay up? He has obviously put aside a lot of money that is due to those affected - he will make even more in the next trump turn. If he gets away with that and shows that it's worthwhile to run a business as immoral as his, others will do exactly the same.

Edit: nvm, I forgot that Trump still owes the state of New York half a billion dollars for massive financial fraud that he will never pay because the US citizens elected him the next president. Well, too bad the US legal system doesn't prosecute anyone personally - especially not with criminal charges. Sorry, I always wrongly assume that the US has a semi-functioning legal system. My bad.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 months ago

Apparently, the familes actually agreed to a lower price on this one.

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/the-onion-buys-alex-jones-infowars-auction-sandy-hook-families/

"The Connecticut families agreed to forgo a portion of their recovery to increase the overall value of The Onion's bid, enabling its success," according to the statement.

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 2 months ago (4 children)
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[–] ieatpwns 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I had hope that the onion would buy infowars and just post all factual news about the presidents antics on info wars and keep the onion satire. But then I realized that would be too good.🤞🏼

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[–] Passerby6497 18 points 2 months ago

Goddamn, I was sure I ate the onion on this one.

This is probably the best possible outcome.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 months ago

Lmao no fucking way. That’s hilarious

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago

They should run actual left wing articles but write them to sound like right wing conspiracies. Like, politicians say raising trans kids is child abuse? THE GOVERNMENT WANTS TO TELL YOU WHAT YOU'RE ALLOWED TO CALL YOUR OWN KIDS!!

[–] jaggedrobotpubes 15 points 2 months ago

This is so unreasonably fantastic hahaha

[–] moistclump 15 points 2 months ago

Ahh, there’s still good in the world.

[–] TK420 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Zombiepirate 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] billiam0202 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I believe we can all guess what JorDan's bright spot will be tomorrow!

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[–] Paranoidfactoid 12 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Guess InfoWars will begin publishing more factual articles, then.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago

Oh this is great. I can't wait to see how it turns out. I truly hope there are some confused idiots when it switches over, although they'll probably believe everything and not recognize that it's satire.

[–] Yes_Man 11 points 2 months ago

Hello, Based department?

[–] Clinicallydepressedpoochie 9 points 2 months ago

After some pretty grim shit for weeks on end this is some decent uplifting news.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Watching the republicans cry on Twitter is the best part about this

They're all saying it's the Democrats trying to silence the truth and how they are knocking at his door trying to take his business and how it's unfair

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

The Onion out here reminding me that there are still good people in this world (outside of my boyfriends, family and friends)

[–] RattlerSix 7 points 2 months ago

This is such a funny dream. It would be really funny if I wake up and this turns out to be true

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

Best news in days, good job onion, I can't wait to hear Jones's spin on this.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

are they gonna post info about wars?

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