this post was submitted on 09 Sep 2024
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Not The Onion

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[–] Volkditty 90 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Want to make a "firing range" pun, but nothing's coming to me...leaving this as a placeholder in case inspiration strikes later.

[–] [email protected] 65 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Good move. The last thing you want to do is post a half-baked pun.

[–] Cadeillac 23 points 1 month ago (2 children)

What about a fully baked gun?

[–] Speculater 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sounds more like a cook off.

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[–] kescusay 31 points 1 month ago

Something about packing heat, too.

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[–] over_clox 47 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)

Who knew? Them damn guns need a warning that says "Do not store in or near excessive heat, fire or flame"...

🤦‍♂️

[–] Zak 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

A quick image search finds this warning label on ammunition saying to store it in a cool, dry place.

[–] over_clox 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Well, yeah, but the gun is safe right? Right...

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

pffftt guns can never be the problem, we need to add the safety label to the ovens!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

No one ever thought of making such a warning because nobody thought anyone would be this stupid!

[–] over_clox 13 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I've literally seen pocket lighters that had a warning that said "Do not use near fire or flame", coming from a device literally designed to generate fire! 😂

People have already proven themselves excessively stupid, I don't see why guns aren't required to have a lengthy safety warning literally etched into the metal by now. 🤷‍♂️

[–] dual_sport_dork 8 points 1 month ago (3 children)

As Dave Barry famously observed, the box a Water Pik comes in bears the warning, "Do not use while sleeping."

Guns already have lengthy safety warnings etched into them. Unfortunately, there definitely isn't enough space to describe every moronic thing people could do with them.

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Just baking up some hot cross guns.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

This should not have made me laugh out loud, but it did!

[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 month ago

(I don't have time to make an image right now, but anyway)

Hey America, how you doing?

Don't keep your gun in the oven.

Oh.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 1 month ago (2 children)

But who can stop an oven with a gun?

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Only a good oven with a gun!

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[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (8 children)

Constantly shocked by people that don't open the oven door at look every time prior to preheating the oven.

How else will you find:

  • no pilot light
  • a blanket
  • cast iron cookware cooling
  • loaded guns
  • forgotten food

Look in the oven people! It takes 1 second.

Edit: I am amazed how many people don't look in the oven before turning it on.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 month ago (10 children)

I do not understand ever storing anything in the oven, its a cooking tool not a storage tool.

I will agree if you have a gas stove that checking the pilot light is a good idea, but those are becoming less common as we are discovering just how bad they are for your health - that, and induction is amazing for anything that doesn't require an open flame (and that's what bbqs are for!).

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (12 children)

we are discovering just how bad they are for your health

It turns out that burning a highly flammable carcinogen in your living environment isn't the best idea.

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Because normal people don't put random shit in their oven to check for?

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[–] AA5B 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Why would you expect anything to be in the oven? Maybe the cast iron is the exception but only because it can take the heat

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Fun fact: Some ovens have a storage drawer at the bottom (drawer under main door.) Some ovens have a broiler at the bottom (drawer under main door. Maybe only gas ovens, maybe not.)

[–] AA5B 8 points 1 month ago (3 children)

And some call that storage a “warming drawer”.

Hopefully you know what you have, plus why would you put anything in storage at someone’s house, if not the place it came from?

[–] Blumpkinhead 9 points 1 month ago

I keep my fireworks in the warming drawer.

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[–] Katana314 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'm reminded of a joke from Burn Notice where Michael has kept a folder of critically important blackmail files in his mother's oven for several seasons. He just casually points out she never actually cooks anything herself.

[–] NotMyOldRedditName 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Thinking that's a good idea, and remembering to do it, are two different things.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Also there could be a cat in the oven, or in America, a cat with a gun.

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[–] CookieOfFortune 35 points 1 month ago (2 children)

So you’re saying they had a… cook off?

[–] Delphia 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)

On this episode of "Great American Bake-Off"

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (4 children)

Mythbusters S05E16. Loose bullets fire off but do not have energy to pierce the metal. A gun will fire a lethal bullet

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

1000017070

Hot bullets get your hot bullets!

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[–] joel_feila 31 points 1 month ago (3 children)

They fucking tested this on myth busters. Don't store bullets near fire

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Amazed to see this. New old house. Used oven for first time. Some sort of stench and black gunk dripping from top heat shield. Gas stove. Investigate. Pull out pieces of a gun. Glock or something. Previous owner stops by for mail (unusual situation). I had over the melted pieces, "you forget something in the oven?" "Oh shit. No problem, I can fix it." "uh.. Okaaaaay... "

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

He can 3D print or just but a new frame. The metal parts will be fine.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

But maybe that individual should not.

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago (10 children)

wait... when you say "fired" do we mean, chambered, and fired down the barrel, cleared, and then cycled fully, repeating, or do we mean the rounds just popped off in the stack, not in the chamber.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (15 children)

Possible with a semi auto, since the chamber and barrel would transmit heat better to a chambered round then the magazine and all the safety parts don't really assume cook off. Yeah a round fires, slide racks back and loads next round, next round cooks off, over and over until all rounds are the same temp.

Spooky stuff.

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago

I mean to be fair who likes to eat cold lead

[–] SirSamuel 17 points 1 month ago

On one hand, it's stupid as hell to store a firearm anywhere but in a safe/cabinet designed for them. An oven is another level of stupid

On the other, I used to store our cast iron Dutch oven in the oven and I can't tell you how many times I started preheating the oven and then remembered to take it out. Usually after its oil seasoning started to heat up

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Uhhhh, also don't store loaded guns? Like, at all. Anywhere.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

This is the part that's boggling my mind.

  1. Stored guns in an oven.
  2. Stored guns loaded.

But not content to stop there:

  1. Stored loaded guns, inside an oven.
[–] kescusay 11 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I worry about the people who need to be told things like this. How did they survive childhood without signs warning them not to breathe water or drink the contents of thermometers?

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

This headline is AGAINST THE SECOND AMENDMENT! Not Be Infringed MEANS NOT BE INFRINGED! I can Store my Gun WHEREVER I want!

[–] lemming741 8 points 2 months ago

Your oven is a machine gun now, to go with your shoelace.

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