Not The Onion

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We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

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  2. ...credible sources, with...
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Academy Award-winning composer Hans Zimmer just branched out into unchartered territory.

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Yet another entry from the truth-is-stranger-than-fiction department, as drug-addicted rats have turned Houston’s police evidence storage into their personal stash house.

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Couldn't make this shit up if I tried.

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The singer, who was hit by technical glitches that forced her to perform an acapella, was allegedly not thrilled about the issue, as well as how she was forced to perform, after initially sparking backlash over the performance and allegedly not “caring” about the hate.

The 41-year-old allegedly felt slighted because past performers at inaugurations for Joe Biden and Barack Obama, like Beyonce and Lady Gaga, have been afforded such luxuries.

“Carrie was dissatisfied with her performance at the event, primarily due to the limited space she was given, which left her feeling cramped and uncomfortable,” the source told the publication.

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FOND DU LAC – A 19-year-old man accused of setting fire to a building in Fond du Lac early Sunday that included Republican U.S. Rep. Glenn Grothman's office cited the TikTok ban as a motive in the incident, according to authorities.

The Fond du Lac Police Department said the Menasha man was arrested after being found near a strip mall, 525 N. Peters Ave., that contained Grothman's district office.

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