this post was submitted on 29 Jul 2024
431 points (98.6% liked)

Terrible Estate Agent Photos

6965 readers
64 users here now

Terrible photos listed by estate agents/realtors that are so bad they’re funny.

Posting guidelines.

Posts in this community must be of property (inside or out) listed for sale which contains a terrible element. “Terrible” can refer to:

Rules.

This community follows the rules of the feddit.uk instance and the lemmy.org code of conduct. I’ve summarised them here:

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

It's bad from the outside, but the inside is so much worse. And it gets worse the more you look at it. So many details that are just so awful. Living in this "house" is probably miserable.

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] aseriesoftubes 77 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Somebody got a smoking deal on a ridiculous quantity of siding.

With all those hard surfaces and open spaces, the echoes in this place must be unreal.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 4 months ago

That’s why they carpeted the bedroom walls.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 months ago (1 children)

The current owner is the only guy in North America to not have a podcast.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] FancyManacles 76 points 4 months ago (4 children)

This is the first time I've seen a "it just keeps getting worse" post and actually agreed. I went in n just expecting terrible siding, then the inside of the house, then the chairs, then the lights, then more chairs, the carpet, the exposed wiring, why are there chairs there?, it just kept escalating. Thank you for this.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 4 months ago (2 children)

I concur. Most "it gets worse" style posts have one or two odd things. This one truly delivered.

It's a 3 bedroom (all queens?), 5 bath house with seating for 20. It's either some crazy orgies at night in only a few beds, a business call center kind of place, or they had massive family gatherings with alarming regularity. Of course there's always the cult option, which means it could also be "all of the above".

There is the wall of family photos on shelves... Maybe family get together center?

What's up with the industrial scale sewing equipment?

[–] FancyManacles 15 points 4 months ago

I made my wife look at it, then I had to go back because she noticed even more insanity. It just kept getting worse every time we went through the pictures.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Windex007 13 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I like that that the bath and shower have the water valves outside of them.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 70 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (8 children)

I lost it when I saw that the siding continues inside. They really went for that one texture look.

Also the through-wall Air Conditioner in the shower????

[–] [email protected] 40 points 4 months ago

What do you mean I can't install siding on the inside... It's called "siding" not "outsiding" it goes on every side!

[–] [email protected] 32 points 4 months ago (4 children)

I was really disappointed that in Exterior Features there was Vinyl Siding listed but it wasn't also listed on the Interior Features. I would've lost it at that.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] fireweed 21 points 4 months ago

There's a through-wall box fan just outside another shower.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] ladicius 60 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Looks like it could be easily transformed into a swinger club. And you could power wash the whole facility after the weekends.

[–] [email protected] 42 points 4 months ago

And since it’s Arkansas, that’s fun for the whole family!

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] RizzRustbolt 46 points 4 months ago (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 months ago

Few windows for outsiders to look in. Many, many cheap tables to eat at.

Maybe just polygamy?

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] littlewonder 46 points 4 months ago (8 children)

Here's my two shots in the dark to explain this monstrosity:

Retired couple buys one of those workshop/huge garage and apartment combos. They decide to turn the workshop into an event space for weddings.

They add a few conveniences for the wedding party, like a couple extra bedrooms to get ready, and a black and red honeymoon suite. The decor is hideous because retired wife is old af and it looks good to her. Retired husband sucks at DIY, like electrical and room layout, but doesn't let small things like planning get in his way.

Grandson works at a siding company that mainly does B2B installs and often has leftovers. Sometimes he grabs other overage from the project after talking to other tradies, like a banister here and there. Maybe an orphan cabinet base.

Grandson wants to start his own siding business one day so he is happy to practice installs on the wedding rental building.

Alternative: Fundie church does secret child marriages here and the couple that maintains the property is allowed to live there as well. The ugliness of the property is because they're purely utilitarian and just need a facade of wedding shit because it's not really about the wedding as much as it's about keeping it on the down-low.

[–] Delta_V 17 points 4 months ago (4 children)
[–] hydrospanner 16 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Is the church still active?

If it's recently defunct or relocating, I'd bet this is the parsonage, assembled on a shoestring budget from the church offering, and using whatever materials they could source as absolutely cheaply as possible.

I'm guessing that either a member of the congregation or family connection of same is a siding guy and was able to get all of this for free or obscenely cheap from somewhere, or was able to get it donated, and rather than waste it or decline what they couldn't put on the outside, they decided to save money on drywall and paint and put it inside as well.

Same with the furniture, etc. this just reeks of "super tight budget but with excesses in certain odd specific areas because we got it donated".

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (7 replies)
[–] NOT_RICK 44 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Is that carpet on a railing?

[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 months ago (2 children)
load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Window_Error_Noises 42 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Holy hell, this entire interior looks like it could be hosed down, time after time, because it's made for repeated indoctrination/orgy/murder of cults with easy cleanup. Unbelievable price, though...

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 39 points 4 months ago (2 children)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 35 points 4 months ago

“Has your cult outgrown mom’s basement? Do I have the place for you!”

[–] [email protected] 29 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Me: What's wrong with siiiiiiideholyshititsinthehouse!!!!!

EDIT: The carpet did me in. I am dead. R.I.P. me.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Clinicallydepressedpoochie 29 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Siding guy: I've completed the outside of your house you want anything else done?

Owner: Sure, go nuts.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 29 points 4 months ago

Holy this is a good one thanks OP

[–] [email protected] 28 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Did anyone notice that the garage interior photos show the misaligned joists about 3/4 of the way back over the truck/jimmy?

I'm not entirely sure they're actually attached to anything.

Oh, and no code inspector ever saw that wiring.

Edit: oh, and the never ending AC unit chaos. They even vent multiple units into the enclosed garage! That just kind of overheats it and returns the entropy to the house?

Favorite AC unit placement: in the shower with its own little upper tier curtain.

Second favorite cooling feature: the structural box fans in the walls.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] PDFuego 27 points 4 months ago (1 children)

"One of a kind"

Thank goodness.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] MeatPilot 25 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

This should have been entirely furnished with those cheap white plastic patio chairs and tables. I seen some, but whoever built this clearly can add much more.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 25 points 4 months ago (1 children)

At first, I thought this must be some abandoned barracks or aircraft hangar that got retrofitted into a private residence, but then I saw it was purpose built in 2004.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 months ago

but then I saw it was purpose built in 2004.

Holy crap

[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 months ago

I love the variety of chandelier's and ceiling fans all next to each other

[–] [email protected] 20 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Wifi and cell phone reception may suck.

Also, I have doubts about the insulation. One can see it in the garage, but one can also see sunlight through the wall.

Like someone chose the cheapest option at every option, and nevet considered the overall best experience.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Who needs insulation when you have 12 air conditioners‽

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] morphballganon 19 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Legit the worst house I've seen on this community

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 months ago (4 children)

Two things:

  1. Archer "Realty"
  2. I've seen plenty of the reverse, but this is the first time I've seen someone make their house with the Doom level editor.
load more comments (4 replies)
[–] ikidd 16 points 4 months ago (4 children)

That. Fucking. Wiring.

This is a fire waiting to happen, I can't imagine what's in the walls.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] Theharpyeagle 16 points 4 months ago

Light fixtures looking like I placed them in the sims

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 months ago

Looks like a cult compound. Wild

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 months ago (3 children)

@OP - This one is truly special. Thank you so much for this gift to we plebes. Wow.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 months ago

So much fucking cladding. I recon the builder gets it cheap

[–] motor_spirit 14 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

This is a literal fucking nightmare. I'd snap if I was tripping in there

[–] Yokozuna 14 points 4 months ago

What the FUCK

[–] Rolando 14 points 4 months ago (1 children)

The only way it would work is if the inside was a viking longhouse.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Whoa, there must have been a blow out sell on office chairs. Who needs normal chairs when you can have an office chair?!

Also, no central heat and air, window units... In that massively hot tin box.

Also I forgot to mention the floor to wall carpeting.

Man this place has it all! What a steal! lol

edit: I totally missed it, but did anyone clock the gigantic quilt sewing machine in slide 34?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 months ago

This looks like an AI was asked to design a house. All the basic elements are there, but nothing makes any sense.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] BigDaddySlim 13 points 4 months ago

Babe wake up, new backrooms just dropped

load more comments
view more: next ›