this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2023
1000 points (98.1% liked)

The Onion

4565 readers
598 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
[email protected]
[email protected]
1000
Report: You Could Quit Job Right Now And Just Play PS5 Until You Run Out Of Money (www.theonion.com)
submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
108 comments fedilink hide all child comments
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 181 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Don’t you fucking tempt me

[–] [email protected] 100 points 1 year ago (1 children)

To quote the article,

just do it—do it right now.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Ok fine. Wait I don't have a PS5 and now I don't have a job. Dang it.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You can come use mine and I'll use you as inspiration to quit.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

You can come use mine and I’ll use you

🤔

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 67 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Please don't tempt me, I am barely holding on.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I've made it 9 months since I quit.

Lotta chicken and rice but I thought I'd take my retirement before I die in the food wars

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Bruh, I aim to the water wars. That's starting next year, I believe.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Hmm that's an interesting chicken or egg problem. Which will come first, the food wars or the water wars?

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago (2 children)

If that doesn't work there's always plan b: drinking yourself to death

[–] half_built_pyramids 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Following in smashmouth guy's footsteps, brave

[–] derpo 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Hey now

[–] derpo 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You’re an all-star

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I've been jobless for around 2 years now because of depression and shit, finally got back into working and I hate myself for not starting up my world of warcraft career back up. I could be a wow king by now 🙃😂

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] son_named_bort 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

So I can quit my job and play PS5 for 15 minutes?

[–] ggppjj 8 points 1 year ago

I could go back in time???

[–] _number8_ 21 points 1 year ago (6 children)

i did this last winter; i firmly believe everyone has and needs slovenly unemployment periods to remind you of the perils of not working [but in equal measure, the bliss of not working and the amount of luxury you can just coast on]

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago

I'm doing this right now. It's the first time in 10 years I haven't had someplace I needed to be 5 days a week. It's really changing my perspective on what I need out of a job and what I could be improving in my life if I weren't spending that time working.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (6 children)

Definitely do this, except replace playstation with heroin.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

For real. Who has money for a PS5?

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (5 replies)
[–] lazycouchpotato 15 points 1 year ago

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago

If only I had a PS5...

[–] Son_of_dad 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Look at mr moneybags over here who can afford a ps5 and a 4k tv

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Literally what I have been doing since last month. I made it a bit more challenging by going on a vacation for a week too.

load more comments
view more: next ›