this post was submitted on 25 Oct 2024
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Not The Onion

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Literally, 'not the onion'

all 40 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Lost_My_Mind 94 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

checks headline

checks community name

........shit. I should have a joke for this, or something.

Hang on.....

.........fuck......

[–] sensiblepuffin 25 points 3 weeks ago

I said "pulling onions" sounds like jerking off while crying. That's the best I got.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

How could you possibly improve upon perfection?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago

Don't eat the crab dip!

[–] OhStopYellingAtMe 46 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I remember a certain former president trying to deregulate all the things.

Now we’re all getting listeria, and he’s poised to be president again.

[–] beansbeansbeans 3 points 3 weeks ago

Since he loves his hamburders so much let's hope he gets all the onions.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

It was the style at the time.

[–] foggy 14 points 3 weeks ago

Gimme 5 bees for a quarter, you'd say

[–] Snapz 22 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Companies like this get an excuse to sell the same products, at the same price, with less ingredients in these moments. Yes the onions only cost then $.02 each burger, but multiply that by 6.5 million burgers sold per day.

They don't give a shit about you, they are pulling the onions to temp boost profit margin as long as they have the cover to say "out of an abundance of caution"...

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Not only that, but some companies don't bring them back. I remember some outbreak happened years ago and Jimmy johns stop serving sprouts on some of their sandwiches. I was assuming they would be back after the outbreak was over, but no. I still eat my sandwiches from their sprout-less.

[–] surewhynotlem 6 points 3 weeks ago

That's about when I stopped going. I get the veggie sandwich. without the sprouts its just not very good

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA 16 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Hold on, my onion memes community is going to be devastated

[–] Cort 10 points 3 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago

Literally, 'not the onion'

But it literally is the onions...

[–] stupidcasey 11 points 3 weeks ago

nottheonion s! ಠᴗಠ

[–] IMNOTCRAZYINSTITUTION 9 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

shit I missed the news and got extra onions on a taco bell burrito this morning. wish me luck...

[–] T156 10 points 3 weeks ago

shit

If you're unlucky, you might well do so.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

!remindme 1 day

[–] zoostation 6 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

What's even the best case scenario of eating McDonald's food?

[–] _Sprite 6 points 3 weeks ago

Nuggets and sour sauce😋

[–] GreenKnight23 4 points 3 weeks ago

You'll need to shit before your hour long commute home.

[–] tee9000 6 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I wonder how big of a pile of onions could be made with all recalled product.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago

Enough to make a grown man cry

[–] General_Shenanigans 6 points 3 weeks ago

See, mom? I told you onions were evil.

[–] PapaStevesy 6 points 3 weeks ago

First they came for the arugula and I did not speak out because arugula is meh. Then they came for the sprouts and I did not speak out because sprouts are whatever. Then they came for the me and my onions and there was no one left to speak for us...because they all had food-borne illnesses.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

Bed bath and beyond fried chicken

[–] yamanii 2 points 3 weeks ago

5% is too little

[–] ThePantser 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

See it's the veggies that are trying to kill you just as much as the meat if not more.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago

It's usually uncomposted manure or the proximity to pasture soil that infects vegetables with E. coli, so it's still a result of the animal agriculture industry.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I saw people in the McDonald's drive thru line today. Can't wait to get an ecoli burger I guess.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Do you really think they're still using the contaminated onions?

3 to 8 days incubation period for e.coli.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

Or that people aren't ever in the McDonald's drive thru

[–] PapaStevesy 1 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

"Took her off the vegetation

Took her by the arm.

Selling E. coli burgers

Couldn't do no harm."