Onomatopoeia usually punch above their weight class here. Shlorp gets my vote.
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Have you ever used Shlorp as a verb? I feel it paints a particular picture
Yes, almost exclusively in the context of dogs shlorping up water from their bowl.
Peef.
It's when you fart out of your dick hole. A "Penis Queef", if you will. Happened to me once when I had a cystoscopy. Weirdest feeling ever.
What the fuuuuuuck. How do you delete someone else's post?
It wasn't fun for me either
I am sorry. I didn't mean to be flippant. I had no idea that was a thing and reacted in the moment. Are you ok? Is your penis ok? Can you teach me your ways, senpai?
I learned a new thing today, thank you!
Does it sound like peef too? How many decibels do you think you could crank one out to?
It sounded like a silent but deadly fart. Like a PFFFFT.
Bjork!
I know it’s not a word, but a name… still if you use it with ! I think it’s particularly funny. Like it’s an exclamation, or a warning.
Bjork is my goto nonsense muppet sound. Bjork bjork bjork Bjork!
Icelandic dogs:
You know Björk in swedish is a tree
It's birch.
Schmutz.
It's Yiddish (?) and is a general term for unspecified dirt or filth. The fun part: once you have identified the filth, it is no longer schmutz.
My spouse and I picked it up from the Says You radio show years ago, and have used it ever since.
Smeg
I expect this requires no explanation. You lemmings already know.
Without wanting to ruffle anyone's feathers, I will submit queef, which would be worth a chuckle even if it held no meaning
It's funny that quaff is spelled similarly, but has a completely different vibe to it. The two don't mix at all.
Well, unless you're into quaffing queefs, I'm not here to judge.
Once I quaffed a queef, inhaled a clunge that had beefed, I just belched for relief and resumed the great feat
You two are wild
However you spell that noise Guinea pigs make.
Bob
This is great, I have a curmudgeonly relative named Bob, and he would just hate to think that's funny
Funt. Looks horrendously rude, resembles two terrible English words, but is completely without meaning in and of itself. Unless you let UrbanDictionary tell you that it's the combination of those two words anyway.
It's also the noise things make when launched out of a tube by compressed air, if not the noise made by lighting gases in a test tube, both of which are highly entertaining.
The spelling "phoont" may be preferable.
Hump
Also: dink
Edit: hehehehehehe
You must be a fan of The Princess Bride, or as I like to call it Prince Humperdink and that Blasted Woman Who Didn't Want to Get Married
Your edit is the whole reason I'm here :)
Engelbert Humperdinck ?
I always enjoyed the word putz. I typically use the verb format but it amuses me that every definition is so different lol.