this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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[–] mipadaitu 170 points 2 months ago

Oh fuck... It's so stupid it's smart.

[–] Jimbabwe 117 points 2 months ago (5 children)

I don’t trust the liberal science agenda so I did my own research. Using some back-of-the-napkin math and my telescope, I’m now blind from looking at the sun through a telescope. This is being transcribed by my trad wife. My results:

2 > 1

This one checks out, folks.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 2 months ago (3 children)

You must be a terrorist because that's MUSLIM MATH! Those are not Christian numbers and feel it necessary to report this comment to the FBI, the Federal Biblical Investigators.

[–] Archer 36 points 2 months ago
[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)

How's this instead: II > I

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[–] FlyingSquid 20 points 2 months ago (1 children)

What, you don't believe in the Nemesis hypothesis?

Because that would bring it up to... hang on, let me get my calculator...

Two stars in the solar system.

[–] Jimbabwe 22 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Fascinating proposal, professor. Thankfully I can adjust my equations quite easily:

2 ≥ 2

[–] FlyingSquid 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] alquicksilver 12 points 2 months ago

There is not a single thing about this comment chain that doesn't bring me joy.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

Thank you for your service.

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[–] theangryseal 70 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

As someone who worked in a gas station for 24 years..

sigh

I’d do it. I’d suck it up. I’d make some damn good friends along the way and then I’d never maintain those friendships and feel guilty for the rest of rest of my life. “Just call him, dipshit. He’s going through a divorce! Just go fishing! Pleaaassse! Ok, here goes. Tomorrow.”

Always tomorrow.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 months ago (1 children)

This is one of the most fascinating comments I've ever encountered on Lemmy

[–] theangryseal 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You’re fascinating. 😘

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

We should be best friends. 👊

[–] geogle 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] theangryseal 5 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] theangryseal 68 points 2 months ago (3 children)

I have no idea how I ended up here. Swear to god I was on the post about the trolley, saving people, and small talk. No shit. Never even seen this post.

[–] Agent641 28 points 2 months ago

This happened to me once too. The Lemmy gods brought you here. You are now a part of the meme

[–] Wogi 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

As God as my witness I thought turkeys could fly. We've all been there.

[–] OldManBOMBIN 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Turkeys can fly. Unless this is a reference to something, then carry on.

[–] Wogi 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

WKRP Cincinnati, first annual turkey drop. A piece of legendary comedy history. Low key a jab at a failed real life attempt to release 2 million balloons in Cincinnati that resulted in two deaths.

[–] OldManBOMBIN 4 points 2 months ago

Ohhhhhhh yeah I remember now!

[–] TinyShonk 6 points 2 months ago

I saw that post right below this one.

[–] theangryseal 17 points 2 months ago (1 children)

And now I’ve posted it in the correct location.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

No this post was the correct location. Don’t second guess yourself. You were always meant to be here!

[–] pendingdeletion 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)
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[–] Mr_Dr_Oink 55 points 2 months ago (3 children)

You got me. Had to whatever the thought equivalent of double take is.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 months ago (3 children)
[–] Klear 13 points 2 months ago
[–] Mr_Dr_Oink 6 points 2 months ago

If i had fallen for it, i would have had a quarter ponder :)

[–] Boggy 10 points 2 months ago

Had yourself a thinkythink

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 2 months ago

I love this because even though I read the words, I interpreted it to mean something else for a second. (atoms and galaxy) Be careful when you read things and don't assume you know something.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Not if you count Taylor Swift

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 months ago

Mmm... Yeah!

[–] hate2bme 17 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Is the joke that there is only one star in our solar system? The sun?

[–] partial_accumen 22 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

yes, ... and only 2 hydrogen atoms in a molecule of water (H2O)

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago

Second time i see this, still funny :)

[–] kamen 11 points 2 months ago

Made me think for a second.

[–] SerotoninSwells 10 points 2 months ago (8 children)
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[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago
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