this post was submitted on 06 Oct 2024
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god I hate living in utah everyone here is mormon

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[–] NegativeLookBehind 68 points 1 week ago (2 children)

“Ok, everyone take your clothes off. We’re gonna shotgun some beers and then do butt stuff”

[–] Iheartcheese 32 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Can people who already sin join?

[–] moistclump 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Iheartcheese 20 points 1 week ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

b-but the bible says premarital sex is the second worse thing to murder! we all need to get married to each other first, then the butt stuff.

[–] NegativeLookBehind 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It’s not sex, it’s butt stuff. Shut up and chug another beer

[–] Speculater 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Let's actually knock two birds off with one stone, lemme grab a funnel.

[–] NegativeLookBehind 8 points 1 week ago

This guy knows how to party. I’ll get the zip ties and duct tape.

[–] affiliate 32 points 1 week ago (2 children)

ive met quite a few mormons who drink monster/red bull instead of coffee because the scripture doesn’t say anything about energy drinks. always found that interesting (in the most neutral way possible)

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 week ago (2 children)

yeah, it's all stupid arbitrary rules. you aren't allowed to drink any form of tea either. it also says any form of premarital sex is the second worse sin to murder. and of course there's all the stuff they like to ignore, like the stuff about not divorcing or anything that doesn't align with their business ideals of making money off the members

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago

I believe the wording is "drinks which burn the throat" which naturally means:

  • ❌ Coffee
  • ❌ Alcoholic drinks
  • ❌ Coca Cola
  • ❌ Hot tea
  • ❌ Chai lattes
  • ✅ Sprite, other non-caffeinated soft drinks
  • ✅ Hot Chocolate
  • ✅ Kombucha
  • ✅ Energy drinks???
  • ✅ Herbal Tea (even while hot, but mostly if you're sick as a home remedy)

Most of the focus is interpreted as "contains caffeine and/or alcohol" but the wording is vague enough that it leaves for a lot of weird wiggle room people try to argue (based on convenience usually). It's quite silly

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

nah bubble tea is fine because it's trendy

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

byu actually does have a bubble tea shop, but they make it without any real tea

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA 7 points 1 week ago

real talk they have been trying to talk my argentine mormon aunt into giving up her matcha and it just makes her laugh

[–] Aeao 12 points 1 week ago

I have the first priesthood. they never say cocaine is a sin only that it's unwise. I never claimed to be wise.

[–] TheTechnician27 26 points 1 week ago

"Shadow, it's me, the Devil. I'm here to convince you to do sin."

[–] niktemadur 23 points 1 week ago

And do always remember to tell them that even some mild sinning can be INSANELY FUN!!! 🥳

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Good luck bringing the good word of sin to those poor lacking people of Utah.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

I think I may be able to manage, just depends on the individual in question :)

[–] spicytuna62 19 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I cohabitated with my girlfriend for 5 years. We're happily married now. One of the first things she did was make a cross stitch that says "No longer living in sin" with our anniversary on it.

It's beautiful.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago

The only place where if you're offered uncut coke, you have to ask which kind.

[–] Zoomboingding 4 points 1 week ago

She made a promise to god, which I intend to break.

[–] Nuke_the_whales 2 points 1 week ago

Yeah if people complain about African immigrants coming to the west to commit crimes, well it's just an equal and opposite reaction. It's just science