this post was submitted on 07 Jan 2024
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imagine a slider on a video game going way in the other direction, that is. this isn't like one of those philosophy riddle things

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[–] SpaceNoodle 79 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Alcohol is addicted to me.

[–] captainjaneway 7 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

"If you've managed to quit alcohol - your greatest weakness - perhaps you've already found your greatest strength."

- Gandalf the Grey

[–] cheese_greater 5 points 10 months ago

I mean, in a way, it can't quit you...

[–] j4k3 38 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Partial disability from a car breaking my neck and back, causing issues with posture :: I have super human strength and endurance I use to fuck up cars for fun

[–] [email protected] 48 points 10 months ago (3 children)
[–] eskimofry 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Ah takes me back so many years!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

The game is "Street Fighter II", in case you have a senior moment like I did.

[–] AtariDump 6 points 10 months ago

You’re not fighting E. Honda, you’re fighting A Honda.

It’s all in the packet.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 10 months ago

My greatest strength is already also my greatest weakness: hyper focus from ADHD.

[–] Limeey 28 points 10 months ago

I’m now on time. People notice my punctuality, no one actually cares.

[–] theywilleatthestars 24 points 10 months ago (2 children)

My greatest weakness is my passivity and inability to make decisions so honestly I have no idea.

[–] Wild_Mastic 24 points 10 months ago (1 children)

You would become an incredible and charismatic leader, always capable of picking the right choice and carrying everyone forward.

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[–] captainlezbian 5 points 10 months ago

You now have the ability and drive to always make decisions. Are they good ones? Who knows but they are decisions

[–] Siethron 20 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I become a social butterfly with insane levels of charisma.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Now I am immortal god.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago (2 children)

A lot of people read this as "your greatest weakness is now gone" which makes sense given the video game slider analogy

Meanwhile I'm here like "how do I somehow, hilariously, become unstoppable by means of procrastinating everything"?

But I did think of it: significantly extend my lifespan by procrastinating dying :]

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

It's not a fortunate power, but time stops for everyone and everything until you are doing something that's even slightly productive.

The cosmic burden of knowing that all of time relies on you getting off the couch, grabbing a shower, and getting done whatever tedious chore you've been putting off. Constantly.

Not a boon, but a curse.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

thanks i'm pretty sure you just gave my assigned personal hell demon ideas 💀

[–] Pratai 2 points 10 months ago

Nine times out of ten, when a question is asked on the internet- it gets taken out of contexts so the people answering can platform whatever dumb shit they feel they need to say.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I’m a jack of all trades, master of none:m; so I’ll be a virtuoso of one thing.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago

Jack of all trade isn't a weakness.

-Sincerely, a jack of all trade.

[–] DaneGerous 12 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Having my head chopped off now makes me stronger and more alive.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago

I am procrastinate and don't fully commit to things: I am well planned and finish everything I lay my hands on.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I'm very forgetful, so I guess in this scenario I have an eidetic memory. I become one of those weird guys who wins every game show due to my fantastic recall of everything I've ever read, seen or heard.

[–] CriticalMiss 10 points 10 months ago

I am happy and enjoy every moment of life.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

I guess my head becomes invincible and nothing can hurt it and I feel no pain in my head, ever?

[–] UnderBoob 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I'm gonna be social and charismatic af

[–] TonyOstrich 4 points 10 months ago

I have always said if I could re-roll my stats I would trade whatever amount of intelligence I supposedly have to be dumb as a box of fucking rocks with a ludicrous amount of charisma.

[–] delta 7 points 10 months ago

i can walk again :)

[–] NorthWestWind 7 points 10 months ago

I break everything I touch -> I fix everything I touch

The other day I saw the clock in the bathroom stop working. I swapped the batteries and it stopped working entirely.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I'm undepressable and I don't have ADHD anymore

[–] 32b99410_da5b 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

All those walls and furnitures will miss you ricocheting off them.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

WHERE DID YOU PUT THE CAMERAS

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

My gremlins that used to crawl over every inch of my home taking things apart, leaving things in senseless places, and constantly asking for food, a listening ear and a hug - are now helping me out around the house, listening when I need another perspective and generally helping keep me out of trouble.

TL;DR - Just parenthood, if all goes to plan...

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

I become capable of doing everything I want to, when I want to do it, instead of overthinking and second guessing myself.

I then work my way up to becoming an uploaded intelligence and abolishing capitalism. /s

[–] Gamoc 4 points 10 months ago

The world is invaded by day walker vampires somehow. Most of the human population is dead or turned, those remaining live under a cloud of distrust and paranoia - anyone could be a vampire. even the people you know could've been turned since you last saw them.

I don't notice. Because of social anxiety, I stayed indoors.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] MashedTech 3 points 10 months ago

God I need this one.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

My love care and empathy for other people has made me the most lovable woman in my country and the most suitable spokesperson for humankind

Reality: I dont like people and my interactions with them , especially when I was young (partys.and stuff) only bolstered that feeling

[–] TheDoctorDonna 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I feel like I'm reading a description of myself.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

maybe i shouldn't have tried to hard to "fit in" and be a socialite back i the day, maybe i wouldnt have such a big dislike of people as i have today

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Well, now that I don't absolutely suck at talking to strangers and don't fumble my words, my life just got a lot easier.

[–] RBWells 3 points 10 months ago

Not my weakness becoming a strength, but going away and now I am a different person, my inverse? But my strengths do not become weaknesses?

Disorganization is my bane, and a complete inability to multitask, so I guess I would either be obsessive/compulsive or would be able to be an executive assistant or politician.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

"If you strike me down, I will become more powerful than you could possibly imagine."

[–] afraid_of_zombies 3 points 10 months ago

I can never be angry. Hmm guess I would change my career to be some guy who teaches seminars or does anger management sessions. Or maybe IT for the DMV.

[–] Clbull 3 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I go from being a socially awkward and unattractive virgin to suddenly being able to pull multiple women in a night.

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