this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2023
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[–] TwoGems 183 points 1 year ago (18 children)
Kathy Berden, 70, of Snover 
William (Hank) Choate, 72, of Cement City 
Amy Facchinello, 55, of Grand Blanc 
Clifford Frost, 75, of Warren 
Stanley Grot, 71, of Shelby Township 
John Haggard, 82, of Charlevoix 
Mary-Ann Henry, 65, of Brighton 
Timothy King, 56, of Ypsilanti 
Michele Lundgren, 73, of Detroit 
Meshawn Maddock, 55, of Milford
James Renner, 76, of Lansing 
Mayra Rodriguez, 64, of Grosse Pointe Farms 
Rose Rook, 81, of Paw Paw 
Marian Sheridan, 69, of West Bloomfield 
Ken Thompson, 68, of Orleans 
Kent Vanderwood, 69, of Wyoming 

lol it's all boomers and cusp Gen X/boomer

[–] [email protected] 83 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Sadly, they'll all be found guilty but too old and white to actually go to prison for their crimes.

[–] Tedesche 8 points 1 year ago

Beat me to it. This is exactly what I think will happen.

[–] pozbo 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

In cases such as this it would be amazing to bar them from having funerals.

"You're too old to sit in a cell, so we're just not going to ever lay you to rest"

Maybe it would help these criminals think about ramifications before committing their heinous offenses.

[–] Stovetop 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's actually an interesting idea. For high crimes committed by the elderly, sentence them to be de-memorialized. Their remains are interred only in a space-efficient public cemetery. They get no headstone, just a small post in the ground with a number on it to mark where they were buried, surrounded by hundreds of other posts.

Every year, the family of the deceased must pay a fee to maintain the site, or else the remains will be disinterred and disposed of so the plot can be recycled.

For the elderly criminal, they die knowing that they will either be forgotten by relatives who don't care about them, or burdening their relatives who do care about them with annual fees.

[–] mycroft 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's basically a prison graveyard, they're on prison property and no one can visit...

[–] Stovetop 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I'm assuming people can still visit in this scenario. They just get a number on the headstone instead of the name. The family can be told that #37281 is grandpa and they can visit, and if they care enough to visit and keep the plot, that might encourage them to pay for what essentially amounts to financial compensation for grandpa's crimes.

[–] mycroft 3 points 1 year ago

In cases such as this it would be amazing to bar them from having funerals.

“You’re too old to sit in a cell, so we’re just not going to ever lay you to rest”

Maybe it would help these criminals think about ramifications before committing their heinous offenses.

Oh come now, we have much worse punishments: they're now under conservatorship, by Britney Spears dad and are on their way to the cheapest old folks home in their state. They're "technology safe" so they can't access the internet for their own personal safety...

Ya know, old folks prison, where poor people go after their family forgets about them and they die of neglect.

[–] danc4498 53 points 1 year ago (1 children)

All cocksuckers on Medicare and social security and probably bitching about socialism.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Rose Rook, 81, of Paw Paw

Please tell me that is a real place

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] gAlienLifeform 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] JustZ 4 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Damn someone was just telling me I should plant paw paw trees the other day. Good fruit I guess?

[–] drhugsymcfur 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If you catch them ripe then they are a seedy soft banana with a different flavor. It's so soft that the best way to eat it is with a spoon using the peel as a bowl.

But they have a very short window of ripeness, there's a reason that they're not commercially grown and it's generally because of the short ripeness window and they're easy to bruise during transport.

If you've got the space and the time go for it, it's a fun little conversation starter to give family, neighbors, & coworkers something that they may not know grows right in their back woodlot.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Have you ever noticed, when you hear a word for the first time, you will hear that word again within twenty-four hours?

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[–] FlyingSquid 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Michigan has a Hell, so there's no reason it can't have a Paw Paw.

[–] Drunemeton 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I’ve been there. When it SNOWED!

[–] FlyingSquid 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Drunemeton 7 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It got a little moist, but we left before nightfall. (My mom, under no circumstances, was spending the night in Hell!)

[–] FlyingSquid 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Here's the most important question: Did they have a human-sized handbasket?

[–] nuachtan 2 points 1 year ago

No, but they do have a country bar.

[–] FuglyDuck 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

well, not with kids in tow, certainly.

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[–] fubo 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

A pawpaw is a real fruit, related to the cherimoya.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asimina

[–] TwoGems 8 points 1 year ago

"Mooom! Paw paw from Paw paw's trying to destroy our democracy again!"

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Prime age to get their information from Facebook.

[–] gAlienLifeform 19 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Probably not a great age to be starting a fourteen year prison sentence at, but they should have thought about that before trying to overthrow our democracy I guess

[–] TwoGems 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Cosmonauticus 8 points 1 year ago

To be fair the first two generations in this meme were raging alcoholics who beat the shit out of their kids and wives. Oh and the whole racists as fuck part.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Is there a great age to do that? Seems to me that the older you are, the less of your real life is lost.

[–] Hextic 18 points 1 year ago (2 children)

This same generation kept repeating shit like "don't believe everything you read on the internet" back in the dial up days. Good advice I took to heart.

Now my own mother believes AOC wants to ban cows because they fart a lot.

[–] JustZ 6 points 1 year ago

Went from "stay in school" to "schools are wokist brainwashing centers run by child abusers and socialists and it's child abuse to send them there."

Fucking morons.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Not even the Internet. They told everyone not to believe everything they see on TV. Drilled it into our heads for years.

Now they're plastered to the easychair, glued to fox bobblehead shows 24/7 getting angry over nonsense.

But the Simpsons and rock music were the devil...

[–] dhorse 24 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I am pretty disappointed in the Gen X generation. I really thought we were going to be a lot more open minded and accepting of people than we have turned out to be.

[–] stringere 15 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Think of all the people you've known who were open minded and accepting and how small the number of them seemed compared to the majority when we were growing up. Know that a lot of those people probably went on to inspire those qualities in others and raise their kids to value those things. I've seen mainstream society come a long way from my childhood in the 80s and teens in the 90s.

I agree, I had a lot more hope for Gen X but we were up against the juggernaut of the boomer voting bloc. As those selfish fucks age out we're finally looking at the possibility of righting the ship.

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[–] el_cordoba 23 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I blame dementia. I have a parent that's still a Trump supporter. It's as if they've lost the ability to use reason. I am pretty sure Trump could shoot them in the face and they'd still vote for/support him.

[–] Arsenal4ever 11 points 1 year ago

He said in 2015 that he could shoot someone on 5th avenue and people would still love him. One thing I will say is that Trump realized he could easily grift people like your parent. I am sorry, BTW. It sucks.

[–] sunbytes 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

There's theories about the lead from leaded petrol doing a lot of brain damage before it was taken out.

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[–] Oderus 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Can't wait to see it all play out. You just know these people won't accept responsibility and will blame others for their actions. I swear if they were 16-17 I wouldn't be surprised but GOD DAMN, they're all over 55 with 2 being over 80.

[–] AssPennies 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

"We were just told to show up and sign this paper. If we had any information about it being untoward or illegal, we would not have done it"

That's Ms. Michele Lundgren making excuses already. Like, you thought it was totally legal to pretend to be electors to subvert an election? Come on.

[–] Oderus 2 points 1 year ago

We were just following orders ... wait, where have I heard that before?

[–] waigl 3 points 1 year ago

There are two people in there over 80, but the oldest baby boomers are "only" 77...

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