this post was submitted on 09 Dec 2023
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Facepalm

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Plot twitst: I dont have any webcams. Lol.

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[–] [email protected] 98 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Hello, my perverted friend.

[–] [email protected] 60 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I've come to wank with you again.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 11 months ago (1 children)

On a webcam soft-ly stroking

[–] [email protected] 42 points 11 months ago (1 children)

To a vid of extreme poking

[–] Aggravationstation 36 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

And the vision that was planted in my brain

Still remains

[–] [email protected] 35 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] grue 22 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Congrats, y'all are the first ever post in Lemmy Sings!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I had a terrible flashback of Reddit where everyone would make the same reply over and over and over

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I had a terrible flashback of Reddit where everyone would make the same reply over and over and over

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

You pos

Edit: I don’t mean it, I love you

[–] Vedlt 77 points 11 months ago

I think if they have videos of me jerking off they owe me money, not the other way around. That's how onlyfans works right?

[–] FartsWithAnAccent 37 points 11 months ago

My likeness is owned by PornHub and our legal team will be in touch.

Please remain where you are.

[–] doublejay1999 22 points 11 months ago

Probably doesn’t need saying, but no matter how tempting- NEVER reply. That just gets you put on an even better spam list.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 11 months ago

I work as a sysadmin and had a user in my building call us about one of these emails. I didn't say it out loud but, if it wasn't true, why would he even feel the need to ask if it was real or possible?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Earlier they used breached passwords associated with the email address to try to add some credibility. They don't bother now. Just another scam meme to join the rest for eternity.

[–] toynbee 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I can confirm they do still bother; I received an email doing this earlier this week.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Ok, I stand corrected. I think the original scam is just outnumbered now.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago

"I'm actually considering doing this for a living, so please go ahead and make me famous. Maybe we can collaborate".

Seriously though, as said elsewhere, never reply to these.

[–] NatakuNox 14 points 11 months ago

You got video of me jerking off for free!? I charge extra just for getting to look at it. Bitch you owe me money, not the other way around!

What op should say to them

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

The first rule of blackmail: supply proof. Not hints or riddles; proof. If they don't attach pictures (or a severed thumb, whatever) it's nonsense.

From the spammers' perspective, though, they sent millions of emails like this at basically zero cost; my catch-all mailbox for five domains gets about a dozen a day. If one moron pays up it's work it to them.

[–] Roflmasterbigpimp 10 points 11 months ago

Damn. 5 Times a Day? Aren't you getting sore or anything?

[–] Ep1cFac3pa1m 10 points 11 months ago

I’ve gotten that same one a couple of times, even giving me an old password for my email to try to make it look legitimate. Only problem is they always say they got me on my webcam, and I don’t have a webcam to catch me on 🤷‍♂️

[–] KazuyaDarklight 9 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Who even has their webcam pointed that low?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago (3 children)

I can appreciate that the plot twist wasn't: "I don't jerk off"

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Invest some time in transferring to a new email address but also an email alias service. That way you never give out your new email address to anyone and give each site/service you use its own alias.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Often a low-effort alternative to this is to use the "plus addressing" trick: [email protected]

The example above routes to [email protected], but you can track and filter on the extra tag portion.

Granted, it doesn't have universal support, but it's somewhat widespread at least.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

This works but has a number of downsides.

Eg hackers just have to remove the +portion to have your email address. You also can't send emails out via any of those addresses.

https://simplelogin.io/blog/email-alias-vs-plus-sign/

[–] paddirn 7 points 11 months ago

That's cool, I mean, I guess people might pay you to stop showing a video of me jerking off to them, that's probably horrifying for other people to see.

[–] De_Narm 7 points 11 months ago

It sure would be awkward, but I don't think I would even be concerned enough about a video like that. It wouldn't even show the thing I'd be watching.

[–] Crack0n7uesday 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Threaten them with a copyright strike...

[–] ook_the_librarian 3 points 11 months ago

Have they learned nothing from that plagiarism video?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

No, I get it. They'll need expensive therapy after watching that.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

My boss got this one once. He asked me if we needed to scan our network for malware.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

That raises more questions...

[–] dipshit 4 points 11 months ago

You think people would do that? Just go on the internet and tell lies?

[–] systemglitch 4 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Yeah this is an old ones I've seen it evolve over the years. I always read it out to my partner so we can laugh.

I also never click links I emails, but this has been going on long enough that they must make bank off of morons who are doing things they are afraid of others to know about, and I bet some pay each time they get this.

I would be out about 14k USD by now if I were paying.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I love spammers who try to shame me into paying them. Good luck trying to kink shame a furry who's given up hiding it. You try doing that and I'll show you the kinda porn that makes me uncomfortable.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I'm laughing as I type this but I am in fact scared to even imagine what could.

But furry porn is a thing? Really? Outside manga and that sort of medium? That sounds hilarious to watch!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

You mean live action stuff? Yeah, it exists. I was referring to drawn stuff though. Some kinks are pretty out there, and art lets you express them in a way that'd be impossible under all known laws of physics (yes, it can get pretty funny, it can also get pretty horrifying).

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

Plot Twist: They downloaded WebCam

[–] IphtashuFitz 3 points 11 months ago

These days if I felt inclined to respond I’d just tell the scammer that somebody already created deepfake AI porn of me so nothing they could possibly have to release would bother me…

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

How did they even get your email?

[–] doublejay1999 6 points 11 months ago

Sweet summer child

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

they gotta pay me licening fees to depict my awestriking appendage's likeness. Imma copyright strike them and their moms

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

Hope they add some kind of filtering mechanism im K9 soon

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