this post was submitted on 24 Dec 2024
809 points (99.0% liked)

Science Memes

11441 readers
245 users here now

Welcome to c/science_memes @ Mander.xyz!

A place for majestic STEMLORD peacocking, as well as memes about the realities of working in a lab.



Rules

  1. Don't throw mud. Behave like an intellectual and remember the human.
  2. Keep it rooted (on topic).
  3. No spam.
  4. Infographics welcome, get schooled.

This is a science community. We use the Dawkins definition of meme.



Research Committee

Other Mander Communities

Science and Research

Biology and Life Sciences

Physical Sciences

Humanities and Social Sciences

Practical and Applied Sciences

Memes

Miscellaneous

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] RizzRustbolt 2 points 16 hours ago

Turns out it was FOOF.

[–] FuglyDuck 18 points 1 day ago

Opportunistic Lab Intern:

“While you’re all debating if it’s half full or half empty I drank it. Now it’s empty.”

[–] BlackWalnut 70 points 1 day ago (5 children)

Engineer: The glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 16 hours ago

Mechanic: The glass is not leaking. Returned to service.

[–] [email protected] 72 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Bad Engineer: The glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
Good Engineer: The glass is 66% full with a 25% safety margin.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 day ago (1 children)

This glass has a safety factor of 2

Re: good engineer: this is the thing that frustrates me amount marketing/labeling for travel mugs or cookware; the listed capacity is the absolute brim capacity not the practical capacity. Want to put 16 oz in a 16 oz mug you’re gonna have to sip 3 ounces out first in order to put the lid on. Want to serve 2 qt soup? Gotta use the 3 qt pot.

[–] pufferfisherpowder 9 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Yes!! So unbelievably annoying. Okay. Thank you. The total volume of this cylinder is 473ml. What the fuck can I use this for?! What I want you to tell me: total volume and total practical volume. Dumb af

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 day ago

Real engineer: it's full. Approximately 50% water, and the rest air.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"The glass was built to the wrong specifications"

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

Glass functioning as intended. Any deficiencies that arise are due to the failure of the customer to provide appropriate design parameters.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Backyard tinkerer and wannabe Engineer: I'll just use this glass jar I used to drain some gas as the thing to drink my water now ..... this is water right?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

Not if you need to stir it.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 day ago
[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 day ago (5 children)

The beaker is always full, when it's half full of water, it is also at the same time half full of air. THE GLASS IS ALWAYS FULL

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA 3 points 1 day ago

for some reason that was never acceptable answer when I gave it. i think they were just jealous they didn't think of it.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

Hopefully, otherwise it may end bad: https://what-if.xkcd.com/6/

[–] dvlsg 10 points 1 day ago (3 children)

But what if I pour vacuum into the beaker?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

Then it would be full of dust bunnies

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'd like a bagel with everything

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

Full of vacuum

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] cosmictrickster 21 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Realist: who’s cleaning all these glasses?

[–] MataVatnik 5 points 1 day ago

Fucking real

[–] NocturnalMorning 34 points 1 day ago (1 children)

My mother in-law is a lab scientist. She says this is accurate.

[–] MataVatnik 17 points 1 day ago (1 children)

You don't even know the half of it

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] MataVatnik 27 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Ah, it's this time of the year again. linked-list (version 3)

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 day ago (3 children)

My lab is pretty easy to guess, it's either 18 MΩ water, 100% EtOH, or 16M HNO3. 66% chance it's not acutely dangerous, not bad for a lab!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

Sticky, Silky, and Danger Syrup! Sounds like a cool lab.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 day ago

Scientist Russian Roulette: Drink the mystery breaker. They all have water, except for one that's hydroflouric acid.

[–] stupidcasey 8 points 1 day ago

Ahh found that label!:

99.985% Pure.

Nitrogen (N₂): 39%

Oxygen (O₂): 10.5%

Argon (Ar): 0.465%

Carbon dioxide (CO₂): 0.02%

Water (H₂O): 50%

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago

I thought the half full, half empty thing. Was about the flow of water. If you're emptying the glass, at some point the glass will be half empty. If you fill the glass, at one point the glass will be half full.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

100% Full with 50% volume occupied by Dihydrogen monoxide molecules and 50% volume occupied by a mixture of molecules in gas form, colloquially refer as "air", which contains, according to the statistical data recorded by analyzing the gas molecules in the air in the Earth's Atmosphere, 78.08% nitrogen, 20.95% oxygen, 0.93% argon, 0.04% carbon dioxide, and small amounts of other trace gases.

🤓

(I have no idea what I'm saying lol)

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 day ago

Scientific paper writer

[–] madthumbs 8 points 1 day ago (8 children)

After a long romp, a fairly new g/f went into my kitchen, grabbed a 1 gal bottle of white vinegar from the fridge, poured herself a glass and tried to chugged it while I was still in bed recovering. -She had the nerve to think I tried to poison her (for half a minute)!

Read and use labels. lol

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Why do you keep vinegar in the fridge? I keep the gallon jug in a cupboard and smaller container just on the counter

[–] marcos 6 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Why do you keep vinegar in the fridge?

Imagine the trouble if it rots!

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] MataVatnik 5 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Loool, and do you keep sodium cyanide in your spice cabinet too?

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (6 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That beaker does not look half full to me. Many like 1/3rd full, or at least somewhere between that and half full.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 day ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

Engineer: the glass is twice as big as in needs to be.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

Engineer: the glass is underutilized/over-sized

Management: Lets hire a consultant to investigate the value proposition of downsizing glasses and discuss the results over a company expensed dinner.

load more comments
view more: next ›