Microblog Memes

A few years ago I wrote a short story about a benevolent alien alliance coming to earth because they observe planets with intelligent life to evaluate if they're worthy of joining the alliance.

They say they usually take 10ish years to do a complete evaluation but it took less than 3 for them to determine not only are we not worthy, but they are officially quarantining our solar system. The basis of their determination: 10 people on this planet have the resources and means of legitimately end all suffering and make this planet a utopia, but they would instead poison and burn 3/4 of the planet to hoard more of those resources for themselves.

This is why we vote for Kang.

OOP has clearly never played "Stellaris".

This writing prompt from about a year ago on the other site is relevant:

Aliens take over the Earth. They then announce that they will be forcing the humans to work a "tyrannical" 4 hours a day 4 days a week in exchange for basic rights like housing. Needless to say they are very confused when the humans celebrate their new alien overlords.

There's always the possibility that they'll improve the status quo.

A civilization capable of interstellar imperialism* would be focused on long-term exploitation of less primitive societies, so they would probably manage us better than the current elites do. A more educated, healthy worker is simply more productive than the alternative, especially in the long term.

• unless it is some kind of swarm of space locusts that just devour everything in their path.

Fuckingcapitalists

Ironically that argument only works for the USA, and definitely the country more fixated in UFO is USA, maybe because of the military idk

Aliens have probably intercepted internet traffic at this point and without setting foot on the planet have decided that it isn't worth the visit.

Enslaves us and treat us like property? Oh how original

"we're here to take over your planet"

"Yes please"

.

Is there a scifi story where the aliens are actually benevolent? Could be funny; they are just genuinely kind but the human mind cannot grasp that and continues to distrust them.

"IT'S A COOKBOOK"

Oh you sweet summer child of a blog poster. The aliens could make us live like say, how things are going for the Ethiopians, Syrians, Congolese, Lebanese, Palestineans, Yemeni, Russians etc.

Or like people have lived through most of history. Especially as a someone who presents female, that seems especially non ideal.

Don't forget the universal truth that it can always get worse.

But what if they take you to their planet and show you their advanced society that everyone works a 3-days week and have great healthcare, just to send you back to Earth afterward??

Ever seen Battlefield Earth?

The aliens really liked it. It's going to be on endless loop on every streaming service, including YouTube.

Don’t forget the anal probing they’ve been known to dabble in