this post was submitted on 27 Aug 2024
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[–] [email protected] 85 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Holy Fucksnacks. My eyes glazed over with all those pseudo-words.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] meco03211 27 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I am serious. And don't call me surety.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 3 months ago

It’s an entirely different word, altogether

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] FMT99 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)

You can't just say "perchance"

[–] FlyingSquid 9 points 3 months ago
[–] Hikermick 10 points 3 months ago

Yeah the first couple of these I tried to make sense of. It's pointless of course, best to just let your eyes roll through it and enjoy the moment

[–] apfelwoiSchoppen 72 points 3 months ago

How to Screw Over a Friend with an Overwhelming Debt!

[–] MrJameGumb 59 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

So he wants his friend to get a car loan for a brand new car, then sell the car they now owe a monthly payment on to him for $1000? Why would anyone ever do something so stupid? Is this just a description of how he plans to screw his friend out of a car and a ton of money?

[–] BonesOfTheMoon 46 points 3 months ago (1 children)

But you see he signed at a 45 degree angle so his friend knows it's all good.

[–] dogsnest 29 points 3 months ago (2 children)

What if the ink is chartreuse, so not a true red?

[–] rockSlayer 14 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That's a crime punishable by death for commercial entities only, private citizens get $20

[–] edgemaster72 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure in the American justice system those punishments would be reversed, i.e. death for us regular folks, slap on the wrist for the company

[–] rockSlayer 6 points 3 months ago

True, but you're forgetting that we're talking about sovcits, which believe that everything works backwards and in their favor

[–] nucleative 10 points 3 months ago

Maybe he hopes the friend would then default on the loan, and tell the bank they can't repo the car because someone else owns it now?

IDK, all stupid because this is why the bank holds the title and has a personal guarantee on the original borrower. His credit will get hosed, the bank will file a lawsuit, and the car will still be repo'ed.

Then this sovcit is welcome to go try to tell a judge why he should get the car back.

[–] [email protected] 59 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I sweat these idiots think they're casting spells or some shit.

[–] lung 39 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It's actually a very sophisticated game of D&D where they are larping as lawyers in a world where they are not beholden to the spirit of the law

[–] deltapi 4 points 3 months ago

Nor the letter

[–] FlyingSquid 18 points 3 months ago

I always think of it like they're trying to do real-world video game cheat codes. That's why they're always so weird about language. If they use the exact right code words, the unlock the cheat.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Is it their intent that the friend is on the hook for a loan with no car to show for it? I can’t tell if they think they’re also canceling the loan.

[–] BonesOfTheMoon 40 points 3 months ago (2 children)

They definitely think they're cancelling it.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

Yes. The bank holding the title does not, however.

[–] meco03211 3 points 3 months ago

I think it's more accurate to say they think their offering to pay in full. The cancelation comes if the loan holder doesn't accept their "special deposit" (which now that I typed it out with quotes I can't shake the association with ejaculation).

I think the "special deposit" shudder is part of the whole "the gubmint has an account with millions of dollars tied to your name" shenanigans they try to play.

[–] FlyingSquid 32 points 3 months ago

Step 1: fuck over someone gullible who you've befriended.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 months ago

"Circle, circle, dot, dot, now I've got my cootie shot. Your move Bank of America"

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 months ago

I feel sorry for the friend who got talked into this.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (4 children)

I didn't understand a single word. can someone explain what this guy thinks he's saying?

[–] Chip_Rat 14 points 3 months ago

Oh I'll try!

I think he thinks by buying the car for $1000 it's his, contract fulfilled he paid for it noone can take it away.

Ignoring how titles work and how you wouldn't be able to get ownership transfered to you with the debt on the original vehicle purchase, he seems to think because he is in the clear (because he bought it legally for $1000) his friend won't still be on the hook for the full price of the contract.

So in his Iala land he would still be screwing his gullible friend over.

I think that's what he is saying...

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago
  1. Buy a car with a huge car loan
  2. Your friend buys the car from you
  3. ???
  4. Since you're not the owner of the car, the loan magically disappears
[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago

Neither did I. My first thought was, "Maybe I'm not as adult as I thought.", but I think this guy is just speaking out of his ass.

[–] kerrypacker 5 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago

By their own logic, whats the point of paying even $1000? Why not just $1? Wouldnt that ALSO complete the contract or whatever?

Motherfuckers just want ez fraud and no repercussions.

[–] Granite 7 points 3 months ago

Dumbass doesn’t know how car titles work. At all.

[–] FireWire400 6 points 3 months ago

I don't know if I'd trust Kevin Macleod with financial advice...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

This guy is somehow going to become even worse when he finds out about trusts and whatever he thinks those are from his cursory glance at Wikipedia

[–] PK2 2 points 2 months ago

Ah, "special deposit" makes it all work. Got it! /s