this post was submitted on 08 Aug 2024
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Ask Lemmy

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My experience on this platform has been mixed so far but one thing I've noticed the most is a significant contingent of the user base is really reactionary in their discourse.

This is a very typical exchange I have here :

User: I don't like this color because it's red.

Me: I don't know, looks more like purple to me. What about red is bad?

User: Why don't you fuck yourself in the face you fucking cuntfuck!

Me: OK...

Like, what gives? I don't have this experience on other platforms. I have arguments but never this shutdown meccanism.

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[–] [email protected] 82 points 3 months ago (7 children)

I wasn't sure what you meant, so I decided to check your profile and see if I could find some examples you responded to... And I learned a lot about you in the process. You sent a single person a lot of "why are you angry" comments. You get into a LOT of arguments on politics subreddits, and even defended Kyle Rittenhouse. You noted that you need to tell people you're left wing, because the things you say convince them you're not.

At a certain point, the reason why so see so many angry people might be that you're the one pissing them off. Or at the very least, you're seeking them out.

[–] [email protected] 50 points 3 months ago (5 children)

"If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you're the asshole."

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

An offline friend and I have this hypothesis that usually, the further left or the further right one becomes, the more closed minded and reactionary they become when presented with an opposing idea.

It’s difficult to live in the grey and to keep an open mind. I think this has become so much harder in the era of social media.

That said, there are absolutely some core beliefs of mine that I would be highly resistant to ever budge on, so maybe you’re encountering some of those folks on theirs.

Shrug it off. Keep going. Be you.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago (8 children)

https://kbin.run/m/[email protected]/t/602314/Kyle-Rittenhouse-criticized-Donald-Trump-So-conservatives-said-he-s-transgender (ctrl-f the name)

This you? Specifically: this you, arguing in a way that instantly, grossly obviously outs you as a troll. Not only the intensely weird way you're defending a murderer, but the intensely weird ways you're going about it. I'd elaborate, but don't feel like educating trolls.

So there's the answer to your " genuine " question. Of course, you remain free to ignore this terrible unprovoked attack from my side and pretend I'm quivering with rage, if that makes you feel better. :)

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[–] Rhynoplaz 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That's very strange. I've been here a year now, and have noticed that it's MUCH friendlier than Reddit.

I see that others have creeped your profile, and made suggestions about not antagonizing others. I'm going to take their word and recommend you take their advice instead of arguing about how everyone else is so argumentative.

[–] TheFonz -1 points 3 months ago

Thanks.

The issue is I am argumentative. I like having disagreents and most of all I like hearing different points of view. If this sounds like a vanilla take, it's because it is.

If I disagree with people on fb or insta or ask to verify the facts of an event there I will get push back or I will learn something new. I will also hear some combative words. Nothing strange.

If I ask about the facts of the matter here:

  • "blocked"

  • "troll"

  • "fuck you you cuntfuck defender of Kyle Rittenhouse. Eat dick."

  • "I have you labeled as conservative cuck"

On. And on. And on. But it's OK, because apparently asking for facts is justification to garner this, right?

What gives?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I think a lot of it has to do with an* impending sense of anomie. Something someone said to me once that I'd have done well to heed earlier: Don't take what people say personally, especially if they mean it personally. The idea being it's probably more about themselves than you.

[–] quixotic120 7 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I think it’s spelled “anime”

[–] Sakychu 10 points 3 months ago

Only if it comes from the Anime region in Japan else it is just sparkling animation

[–] breadsmasher 3 points 3 months ago

Lets not do that stupid reddit chain comment thing here

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

are you on *.ml?

that's their whole game.

block .ml and most of the people deliberately picking fights should up and vanish.

i say that as very rarely experiencing what you're describing, especially compared to other social media platforms

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I would say the majority of mine have been fine and even some i thought might go off the rails had a nice back and forth where I even learned a bit. I mean I have encountered reactionary and mean stuff but does not seem super often to me. kbin meltdown sorta messed up my account thoush so I have not really got my feed going in mbin.

[–] TheFonz 1 points 3 months ago

That's good! Gives me hope. Thanks!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Self selection I assume. You need a certain mindset to go the long mile of actively being on lemmy, and that mostly overlaps with an hypercritical attitude.

Or maybe that's just me.

[–] spittingimage 5 points 3 months ago

There do seem to be a small number of people here who have no middle gears, don't there?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Challenge them and they mostly back down and come to their senses. Failing that, block them. They're so sad it's not worth your time. I imagine they live very lonely lives arguing on the internet with strangers.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Because people are mainlining propaganda en masse and it's rotting their brains. Maybe fediverse users are more abrasive idk, but the adversarial tone in online discourse nowadays is hardly unique to the platform.

[–] z00s 4 points 3 months ago

I think some people use the internet to vent after a long day at work. I've dinner it at times and have had to stop myself from forming an unhealthy habit

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

You will need to block a bunch of people when you first join, or move to an instance that has already done that for you.

... or use a platform that automatically hides comments that get lots of downvotes. I looked in your posting history - the comments you remarked about being angry didn't even show up for me.

... and filter out US politics & Israel politics. You'll need an app/platform that lets you define filters, tho.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (11 children)

Your filter may have hidden the fact that he posts a LOT on politics, political memes, and world news, and often gets extremely downvoted for what he says.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

The trolls get what they deserve. Not trolling, huh? Yeah, that's what they all say.

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[–] Rooki 2 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Popcorn

Me waiting for someone arguing there are no angry guys here.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] Rooki 1 points 3 months ago
[–] breadsmasher 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I am SO FUCKING CALM

bet that makes you angry huh? you mad im so calim?

/s /jk

[–] Rooki 2 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

HOW DARE YOU TREAT THIS COMMUNITY LIKE THIS

[–] Rooki 0 points 3 months ago
[–] TheBigBrother 2 points 3 months ago

There are people who is always angry about everything, not just in Lemmy but in everyday life also. Just keep you mouth shut and observe. Don't take them so serious.

[–] TheBigBrother 2 points 3 months ago

Haters gonna hate.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

Without looking into a detailed history of what you might have said that spurt it, Pay attention to the instances that it's coming from, a lot of times you will notice that those users are coming from specific instances. I noticed this as well and there's some instances that I haven't blocked fully yet but I am debating.

It is very toxic, but if you don't let it get to you it's just a simple block and move on. I don't see as much toxicity on the platform as I did a few months ago by doing this method, and there are quite a bit of people that do take the time to give constructive feedback and have a civil conversation.

My experience overall on the fediverse is overall positive.

Hidden text because is off topic from ops post >! and while this is a little off topic of your post I would also encourage people to turn off your scores(the upvote/downvote system). Most third-party clients give you the ability to do it and I have had them turned off myself basically since my second month mark. It helps remove a lot of the hive mind / populous bias/ Argumentum ad populum(this is a link it's just spoiler hides it) that occurs by being able to see the scores. Due to the fact that the system works as a whole by judging the score in the sorting system you don't lose the ability to see the more popular stuff towards the top, so really unless you care about how many people are liking your posts, there is no cons to disabling!<

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