this post was submitted on 21 Jun 2024
839 points (98.2% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

25068 readers
4149 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 80 points 1 week ago (2 children)

"your hot wife obviously is suffering from sexy demons. I need to use my specialized equipment to vigorously purge them from her, once each evening, and sometimes just after lunch..."

[–] AFKBRBChocolate 61 points 1 week ago (3 children)

That sounds far fetched until you remember that they diagnosed women with hysteria and treated them by giving them orgasms. When the vibrator was invented to treat muscle pain much later, doctors latched onto them for treating hysteria to give their hands a break.

[–] disguy_ovahea 43 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

Absolutely. Hystéra is Greek for uterus. Hysteria, or the “roaming uteri” theory was a successor to Plato’s theory of hysterical suffocation. They believed that the uterus could migrate around the body, placing pressure on internal organs. It’s like gynecological fan fiction.

[–] roguetrick 23 points 1 week ago

When pregnant that's a pretty good explanation of what it does though. Uterus just tells everybody up to the diaphragm to get outta the fucking way.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] disguy_ovahea 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Duh. Uterus is Latin. Thanks. I’ll edit for clarity.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (8 children)

I had to look it up myself lol

load more comments (8 replies)
[–] Dadifer 8 points 1 week ago

I think that makes up for a lot of bad things that were done.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago (4 children)
load more comments (4 replies)
[–] iAvicenna 8 points 1 week ago (4 children)

that still exists today in Turkey

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Well in that case

Merhaba, bugün doktorunuz olacağım. Lütfen eteğinizi kaldırın, iç çamaşırınızı çıkarın ve her zamanki pozisyonu alın.

[–] boatsnhos931 1 points 1 week ago

Gobble gobble

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] disguy_ovahea 44 points 1 week ago

The only logical solution is for me to blow pipe tobacco smoke in your butthole.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 1 week ago (2 children)

"You got hysteria lady, time for a finger blasting session."

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago (3 children)

They used a vibrator because they did not want to get tired.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago
[–] modus 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I've never heard that term for an intern.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I mean, yeah, after you got a hysteria lady.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 week ago

go back in time

give people real medical advice

"wash your hands after working with cadavers"

get drummed out of the profession

die in an asylum

[–] MTK 26 points 1 week ago

Lol, you can still do that, just call it "the truth that big pharma doesn't want you to know"

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Credit to John Mulaney for this joke

[–] Decoy321 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

This joke has been around a lot longer than he has.

Also, this image is a knockoff of a decade old meme, but made worse by adding a lot more words.

Edit: the older version

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Decoy321 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

You are quite welcome!

(I'm helping! Yaaaaaay!)

Edit: Found the old version, just to provide actual help.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago

Sadly you could still do this today and charge insurance in the US as long as people don't care you're charging their insurance.

[–] Theharpyeagle 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Something about the phrasing "you should do a lot of cocaine about it" really tickles me. I wonder what you call breaking grammar rules for humor like that.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago

You’ve piqued my interest and now I want to know, too!

[–] snausagesinablanket 10 points 1 week ago

Not to leave out covering your forehead in leeches to suck out evil.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

You've got a horrible infection and a fever?

I'll be right over to slit your veins and let all the bad blood out.

(In fairness I think bloodletting was mostly out of practice by the time actual telephones existed, but lol joke)

Maybe a more time period accurate one would be:

Your foot hurts? You think its from a badly fit shoe. Ok. Ok. Come over tomorrow and we will stick your foot into the wildly overpowered and unshielded x ray scope and we'll see what can be done.

[–] Sam_Bass 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Sadly (or not), they werent making shit up, they actually believed what they said

[–] GladiusB 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Sam_Bass 4 points 1 week ago

Yep. Thats a demographic that has gotten a whole lot more exposure lately

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

There is a ghoti swimming in your veins

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

Do you have a ghoti-ing licence for that joke? Wild ghoti must be preserved, you know!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

Let’s not forget, keeping your ear to an ample bosom “listening” for heart sounds.

load more comments
view more: next ›