go back in time
give people real medical advice
"wash your hands after working with cadavers"
get drummed out of the profession
die in an asylum
this post was submitted on 21 Jun 2024
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"You got hysteria lady, time for a finger blasting session."
They used a vibrator because they did not want to get tired.
Sometimes
I mean, yeah, after you got a hysteria lady.
Lol, you can still do that, just call it "the truth that big pharma doesn't want you to know"
"your hot wife obviously is suffering from sexy demons. I need to use my specialized equipment to vigorously purge them from her, once each evening, and sometimes just after lunch..."
That sounds far fetched until you remember that they diagnosed women with hysteria and treated them by giving them orgasms. When the vibrator was invented to treat muscle pain much later, doctors latched onto them for treating hysteria to give their hands a break.
Absolutely. Hystéra is Greek for uterus. Hysteria, or the “roaming uteri” theory was a successor to Plato’s theory of hysterical suffocation. They believed that the uterus could migrate around the body, placing pressure on internal organs. It’s like gynecological fan fiction.
When pregnant that's a pretty good explanation of what it does though. Uterus just tells everybody up to the diaphragm to get outta the fucking way.
Greek, not latin
Duh. Uterus is Latin. Thanks. I’ll edit for clarity.
I had to look it up myself lol
I couldn’t remember the spelling of the Greek word, so I looked it up yesterday for that comment. I searched “Greek word for uterus” and then wrote Latin in the comment like a dingus.
Not only was Plato Greek, but Latin words that end in “us” are pluralized with an “i.” It was all right there mocking me. Lol
Wasn't at all mocking! It wasn't even me who caught it. My GF was like "Hmmm, thats too internet-only-fact" and looked it up. Just passing it along cause I sure as shit didn't know lol
No worries! I didn’t take it as such. I meant the comment itself was mocking me. I knew better.
Oh, yeah, that feeling sure is fun... especially when it catches a hyperfixation wave.
Have you been talking to my therapist? Lol
No we just gone so crazy that you don't even remember I'm you buddy! Try and remember on Wednesday, it's embarrassing when we don't check the mirror on our way out the door, can't have that happening again.
Not after that Hoffstadtler presentation mishap, no.
You’re fun. I hope you and your girlfriend have a great weekend!
Lol thanks! I feel the same. Enjoy what's left of your weekend too!
I think that makes up for a lot of bad things that were done.
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that still exists today in Turkey
Well in that case
Merhaba, bugün doktorunuz olacağım. Lütfen eteğinizi kaldırın, iç çamaşırınızı çıkarın ve her zamanki pozisyonu alın.
Gobble gobble
Can you tell us more? It sounds legitimately interesting.
well your regular small scale religious cult leader being the main point of contact for every health concern (because they set up shop in a very rural area with a lot of religious conservatism and limited health care). People go to them for all sorts of reasons and when you are a female the general answer is you are infested with demons I can help you personally in my bedroom. It is especially ironic when they go to this person because a female cant get pregnant and then voilà!
Something about the phrasing "you should do a lot of cocaine about it" really tickles me. I wonder what you call breaking grammar rules for humor like that.
You’ve piqued my interest and now I want to know, too!
The only logical solution is for me to blow pipe tobacco smoke in your butthole.
Credit to John Mulaney for this joke
This joke has been around a lot longer than he has.
Also, this image is a knockoff of a decade old meme, but made worse by adding a lot more words.
Edit: the older version
Thank you for your input.
You are quite welcome!
(I'm helping! Yaaaaaay!)
Edit: Found the old version, just to provide actual help.
You've got a horrible infection and a fever?
I'll be right over to slit your veins and let all the bad blood out.
(In fairness I think bloodletting was mostly out of practice by the time actual telephones existed, but lol joke)
Maybe a more time period accurate one would be:
Your foot hurts? You think its from a badly fit shoe. Ok. Ok. Come over tomorrow and we will stick your foot into the wildly overpowered and unshielded x ray scope and we'll see what can be done.
Sadly you could still do this today and charge insurance in the US as long as people don't care you're charging their insurance.
Sadly (or not), they werent making shit up, they actually believed what they said
So do the crazy people
Yep. Thats a demographic that has gotten a whole lot more exposure lately
Not to leave out covering your forehead in leeches to suck out evil.
There is a ghoti swimming in your veins
Do you have a ghoti-ing licence for that joke? Wild ghoti must be preserved, you know!
Let’s not forget, keeping your ear to an ample bosom “listening” for heart sounds.
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