Striker was made of a standard iron osmium alloy, but with a 2% nickel impurity that made them truly special

It's so sad Striker died of ligma

RIP Striker, best sloppy toppy for $20 you could ever get.

RIP Striker.

This site will never be the same without you.

I don't know how you are posting from the afterlife, a feat which science is yet to explain.

But that is the power of love I suppose.

This isn’t mine, but I was reminded of it:

Five requests with regard to my eventual death September 10, 2021

1. If it happens that my death occurred in some public place, there is to be no ersatz memorial created on that location comprised of teddy bears, mylar balloons, or terrible poems written on posterboard in pink Magic Marker™. This is very, very important.

2. If you choose to have any kind of service “memorializing” me, there will be no use of the phrase “looking down on us.”

3. At no time is any outraged friend or family member to appear in public looking indignant and holding up a framed photograph of me.

4. If you refer to anything I’ve ever done as “brave,” “courageous,” or “special,” I will personally come back from the grave and shit angry ghost turds in your coffee pot.

5. If the resources exist and the weather is fine, I’d prefer to have my remains torn asunder by vicious dogs while “Tusk” is performed by an enthusiastic high school marching band.

http://www.5ives.com/archives/2002/12/11/five-requests-with-regard-to-my-eventual-death/

Dear Striker,

May you find solace in knowing that your legacy will endure through the training of an AI bot on your data. Your influence will continue to shape the future, ensuring that your memory lives on in a unique and everlasting way.

Best wishes to your family and friends during this time.

Warm regards, random internet stranger.

Striker? I hardly knew 'er! Oh hi Mark.

Your memes brought me much happiness. Especially that one 2 days ago about the straw, which was able to disturb my entire friend group.

Striker was the baddest motherfucker around, as evidenced by Striker's mother's deep postcoital disappointment.

Somehow that reminded me of this

Oh, Striker, hearing about your tragic (and hilarious) passing truly has us scrolling through the stages of grief! Your memes lit up our feeds like a smartphone screen in a dark room—always there when we needed a laugh or a perfectly timed GIF. You weren't just a username to us; you were the unsung hero of our notification alerts. Each post you shared wasn't just content; it was comfort. In your digital absence, we'll strive to keep the LOLs alive in your memory. Rest in pixels, dear friend. Until the next meme revival!

You were born in 2000?

I'm old now.

He achieved in death what he could not in life, a way for Blitz and the rest of the IMP crew to no longer be able to make constant sex jokes around and about him.

is this a joke? Is this a relative's work?

RIP in spaghetti, never forgetti

Has anyone ever happily passed away?

The guy who gave Wolverine the Adamantium?

Striker,

I know you were always concerned about it and feared rejection so I honored your wishes to never speak of the events while you were alive, allowing you to live your way. However, with you passing I believe I can share with the world the beauty (and horror) that you brought upon the world free of judgement and felony charges.

It was 5 years ago beginning with 23 drinking straws, a roll of duct tape, a fresh hair cut, 4 kilos of thermite, a very fetching scarf, and a copy of the Dialogues of Plato. You didn't begin that evening planning to change local laws of Ann Arbor Michigan, but before the night was over, you certainly did....

I am speechless

I liked your use of pink, and your glorious name. Rip striker

Best knob-gobblin' clog polisher I've ever gone to for a spit-shine.

Noo! There will never be another like him :(