this post was submitted on 11 Jan 2024
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[–] ChicoSuave 144 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Meanwhile the boomers built a Lemon Trust Score that says you need to start squeezing lemons from day one to be trusted to make lemonade, so the lemon bank will give you a lemon loaf that takes 30 years to pay back with twice as much juice as any lemon can make. All while the news tells us that outsiders who never had a lemon in their life want to take our juice, but really it's juice lord propaganda against any new juicers.

We are drowning in lemons and can't make lemonade without giving it all away, leaving us with all the labor and none of the juice.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 10 months ago

Shut up and make juice for me or else I'll stop renting my 14th lemon loaf to you!

- Lemonlord

[–] [email protected] 98 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (7 children)

Elder millennial here.

"When life promises you lemons as a child and drills into your head the importance of preparing to make lemonade because the lemons are coming and you've got to be ready and get the sugar and the water and the ice ready because you're totally gunna get those lemons and have a lemonade-based future of stability and fulfillment and happiness, prepare to be blamed when the lemons don't arrive."

[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago

Makes me cry. The good luck I've had in my life should mean I could retire early. The bad luck I've had in my life means I still have no retirement fund. But at least I haven't gone through foreclosures like a lot of people my generation have.

[–] pyromaster55 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Don't forget punishing you for spending all your time and money on sugar, ice, water, pitchers, and practice learning to make lemonade.

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[–] Rand0mA 8 points 10 months ago

Ufff. This hurts

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[–] [email protected] 59 points 10 months ago (3 children)

I'm gonna have to say it? Lemons are crossbred between a citron and a sour orange. Life never gave us lemons. We made that shit ourselves.

[–] [email protected] 54 points 10 months ago (1 children)

What I learned recently:

Lemons are a hybrid of citrons and bitter oranges. Which means life never gave us lemons. We gave ourselves lemons and then proceeded to bitch about it.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Hey I'm not gonna bitch about it. In fact, I'mma bitch if you don't give me lemons with my fish & chips for free.

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[–] Sterile_Technique 49 points 10 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 41 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Something something Cave Johnson.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago

Something something house something something combustible lemon

[–] craigers 7 points 10 months ago

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons. I'm going to to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

[–] [email protected] 36 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Greatest generation: has a lemon party

[–] tux7350 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Hey that sounds fun! I wonder what kind of stuff you would bring. If only I had some ideas for a Lemon Party 🤔

[–] Frozengyro 11 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Lots of helpful info on that here, lemonparty.org

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[–] Kase 35 points 10 months ago (1 children)

when you thought everything would be easy peasy lemon squeezy but it's actually difficult difficult lemon difficult

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[–] millifoo 35 points 10 months ago (9 children)

As a GenXer, i have no idea what "make lemon noises" even means

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)

As a GenZ member, I have no idea.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 10 months ago (3 children)

I thought that was the point. I've just assumed that gen Z realized there's nothing fun left so you gotta make your own fun whether or not it makes sense.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

I like that philosophy.

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[–] bus_factor 16 points 10 months ago

I think the joke is that GenZ will do something random and unexpected.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I figured Gen Z is the lemon in this case.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago

They're the noises you make while having sex in your lemon suit with an orange you barely know.

[–] samus12345 12 points 10 months ago (2 children)
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[–] flicker 8 points 10 months ago

Then you are appropriately interpreting Gen Z.

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[–] weeeeum 30 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Bold of you to assume that life hands lemons out anymore. You have to rent them now.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

Lemon of the month club!

For just $19.99/3.33 weeks, Lemon of The Month Club will mail you a brand new, artisanal lemon from our holistic, natural, hand-plucked groves! And your lemons will come to you pre-peeled, sliced and individually vacuum sealed for MAXIMUM freshness!

Or you can upgrade to the Lemon n’ Rind of the month GOLD club for an extra $9.99/3.25 weeks, where your monthly lemon package will include double the amount of vacuum sealed packages, the standard six lemon slice vacuum packs PLUS the rind so you can zest your lemons like a real professional lemoner!

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 27 points 10 months ago (1 children)

When god gives you lemons, you FIND A NEW GOD!!

[–] TSG_Asmodeus 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Made with Lightning; REAL LIGHTNING!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

Why yes, i would like to spend the next two hours binging Power Thirst videos.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Alright, i've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, DON'T make lemonade!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Make life take the lemons BACK!

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[–] hOrni 11 points 10 months ago (3 children)

This is the internet. Don't mention lemons. It makes everybody think of on thing.

[–] teft 34 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

Edit: this is a very difficult gif to search for without ending up with some eye burners.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago

Oh, you lemon-stealing WHORE!!!!

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[–] The_Eminent_Bon 10 points 10 months ago

Unless yer a lemon stealing whooorrr

[–] june 8 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Hey! Gen Xers! You weren’t forgotten!

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