this post was submitted on 13 Oct 2023
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Rolling coal is the practice of tampering with a vehicle's emissions control system, causing it to spew black clouds of sooty exhaust.

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[–] icy_mal 189 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Rolling coal is an extremely inefficient method of converting little dick energy into kinetic energy.

[–] luckyhunter 21 points 1 year ago

It's a great way to convert money into carbon soot though.

[–] Fredselfish 141 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I hope this enforce to the point that all the assholes in my state that have rig thier trucks to do this can go to fucking jail or have their trucks and licenses revoked.

[–] [email protected] 77 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's only illegal if it's enforced, and the people who roll coal are the same types of people that would enforce the rules.

[–] capital 66 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Some of those that work forces are the same that spew carbon.

[–] jaybone 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 107 points 1 year ago (24 children)

Can we please actually enforce the rules on drivers though? These are so obviously illegal yet nothing is done.

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[–] shalafi 99 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Fuck it, hit 'em hard. Been buying off eBay for 20-years, I like 'em. But this seems like a fine place to put our collective foot down and say, "No. You can't do that."

[–] btaf45 77 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

I was shafted by an Ebay seller who was nasty and awful. He acted like he was too stupid to understand why his item was not at all what I ordered. He had a 99.4% approval rating. I thought how the hell was that possible? I found out when I went to leave my negative rating and Ebay would not allow me to post the negative rating.

[–] Kethal 37 points 1 year ago (7 children)

A seller shipped me a phone that was much worse than what I bought, and it wasn't even the same brand. I returned it. However, the seller wouldn't ship the right phone but still had the listing saying several were available. I couldn't leave a negative review, which makes no sense, and I reported it to ebay, but as of yet nothing has happened to the seller that I can tell.

It's really disappointing. I want an Amazon alternative, but it's tough if I'm going to have to go through this crap.

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[–] Holyhandgrenade 80 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Good. Why not ban those oversized SUVs while you're at it? They're a serious danger to children and they're not even good at hauling stuff!

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[–] FlyingSquid 61 points 1 year ago (5 children)

I drive a Prius. Assholes "roll coal" when they drive next to me all the time. I don't even get it. They're not even giving me shit for having an electric car, they're giving me shit because I pay less for gas than they do.

[–] TheDrunkard 52 points 1 year ago (2 children)

No, it's because of their fragile ego.

[–] FlyingSquid 30 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Sure, but they do it specifically to Priuses. Electric cars too, but also Priuses and other hybrids. I've heard so from other hybrid owners and seen them do it too. It is definitely about their fragile ego, but I think it's also just because they're idiots.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

They feel threatened because they think they'll be forced to drive a small hybrid one day. Which bothers then because, yeah... their fragile egos

[–] FlyingSquid 31 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Jesus H. Christ, these assholes are terrified of imaginary fascism and vote for real fascism...

[–] RememberTheApollo_ 23 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Because my fascism where I fuck over people I don’t like is better than your fascism where you give me health care, clean air, and affordable education.

-the assholes

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[–] [email protected] 57 points 1 year ago (13 children)

Wait I thought people were just tampering to get higher performance or something, idk. But they're literally doing it to make the vehicle spew worse than it already does? Wtf and why? What is wrong with people?

[–] Blaster_M 67 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Running the diesel engine extra rich so it vomits extra sooty exhaust instead of properly burned, cleaner exhaust, because they feel the need to compensate for their small member by annoying everyone else.

[–] I_Fart_Glitter 20 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Since getting an electric car they've started cutting me off, brake checking me and then doing the soot farting thing. It's like they need to make up for my car's lack of tailpipe emissions in a way that really lets me know they're doing it.

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 year ago (2 children)

why?

They see it as a "fuck you" to liberals/environmentalists.

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[–] grue 40 points 1 year ago

Wait I thought people were just tampering to get higher performance or something, idk

Some folks are, but their goal is to not spew a bunch of black smoke because black smoke means incomplete combustion, which in turn means less power than they could've had if they'd managed to shove more air in.

"Rolling coal" is an entirely different thing based purely on idiocy and spite.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago

It looks tuff, bro!

The worst thing is the people who intentionally spew Priuses (back when they were the only semi-electric cars around) and bicycles with soot, as some sort of "fuck you for trying to not pollute, hur hur" thing.

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[–] [email protected] 50 points 1 year ago (19 children)

Not sure it's specifically eBay that should get the fine here, it should be the sellers ON eBay.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Agreed. Nobody wants the eBay police, but sellers and buyers should be the ones held accountable.

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[–] [email protected] 45 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Please crack down on rolling coal in general. If you were to put it in the context of the shopping cart theory, it would be shoving your cart directly into someone else's car.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago

It's the sheer waste that gets me - not just the fuck you tiny dick bullshit of spewing your effluence onto people intentionally, no, they need to waste fucking shittons of petrol or diesel to do it MEANWHILE THE WORLD IS FUCKING BURNING. The fucking amazon dried up, what more evidence do they need?

Of course, if evidence swayed them, if they had half a fucking brain they'd never try this shit in the first place. But you know what's worse than the stupids running the planet into meltdown?

The rest of us let them. Even wildly stupid bullshit like this.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

DOJ infringing on my god-given rights to own the libs per usual

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[–] Hackerman_uwu 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This has got to be this most pathetic chapter in the American saga.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Fun fact. My workplace added recycle bins to the breakroom a few years ago. The day after, HR had to call a facility-wide emergency meeting to explain that their use was voluntary only and that no workers would be required to use them.

Grown ass adults lost their shit because they saw a recycle bin.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago (4 children)

I've been coal rolled and driven off the road as a recreational cyclist on rural, lonely roads. The last time I felt safe cycling on the road was 5 years ago?

[–] batmangrundies 24 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Seems like the entire Western world is dealing with a rise in anti-social behaviour on the roads since the pandemic started.

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[–] LordOfTheChia 23 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Could have been worse. A 16 year old here in Texas ran over 6 cyclists while trying to roll coal on them. 2 had to be airlifted:

https://www.chron.com/news/houston-texas/transportation/article/waller-bicyclists-hit-truck-teen-driver-ironman-16490862.php

four of the six cyclists who were hit were hospitalized. Two of those had to be airlifted because of the severity of their injuries.The update:

https://www.bicycling.com/news/a37808647/texas-driver-assaults-six-cyclists/

A 16-year-old truck driver ran over six cyclists out on a training ride on September 25, in Waller County, Texas.

The driver was attempting to “roll coal” on the cyclists when he hit them, according to witnesses.

The driver was finally arrested on November 8 and indicted with six counts of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, which is a second-degree felony.

Edit: the last update from the Law Firm representing the cyclists:

https://www.bikelaw.com/2021/11/felony-charges-for-waller-driver/

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[–] uis 26 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If they market them as intentionally modified, then probably criminal case can be opened against them.

  • [x] Intention
  • [x] Health hazard for others
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[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago (7 children)

The practice is sometimes used as a form of anti-environmental protest.

Sometimes? What are the more common reasons?

[–] SkybreakerEngineer 39 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It's also used to assault cyclists for the crime of existing

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[–] TechyDad 22 points 1 year ago

The article had a video and I could only stand watching it for a couple of seconds. It started with a Russian sounding guy saying they were going to show why a Prius is dangerous to the environment. Then, they showed people laughing as they rolled coal at electric car drivers.

Is that their argument? "Electric cars are dangerous to the environment because people driving electric cars make me spew tons of smoke into the atmosphere"?

What's next? "You recycled your can. That's bad for the environment because that forced me to spill this toxic waste into a playground. All those kids got sick and it's all your fault for recycling!!!"

[–] Daft_ish 22 points 1 year ago (2 children)

If you rolled coal expect to be held down and repeatedly kicked in the crotch at the inevitable climate induced apocalypse.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago

But the LIB's got owned, didn't they.... fucking losers

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (9 children)

I didn't even know this was a thing - impressively stupid and dangerous on the open road.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 1 year ago

You just described the modern conservative:

Impressively stupid and dangerous.

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