Honestly wish I could do that. I've gotten so used to masking my inability to do small talk that I basically just say yes to everything. It's super annoying and something I want to work on, but I dont really know how.
this post was submitted on 24 Aug 2023
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Its incorrect wording but i shorthanded it to 'embrace the sociopathy'. Very nice little koan to drop on the programmed reaction i've had to natural ASD reactions
'You can't do that it's sociopathic!' No ma it's ASD and i'm tired of pretending i'm not to save your face.
Since the acronym for sociopath is ASPD, I will often respond with something like "nuh uh, mine has one less letter". Pretty niche, but when someone gets it, so good.
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most of the people claiming it's sociopathic tend to be pretty controlling in my experience, which is ironic
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Seems Germany would be heaven to this userbase.
Pose a question, expect a no-nonsense, factual answer. Don't be offended but appreciate the candor and brevity. Get back to being productive so you can leave for a timely Feierabend like everyone else.
To be fair, this would probably still be considered very unusual in Germany. You're not obligated to do a while song and dance, but uf you do this I would assume it's a very deadpan joke.
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I was watching a YouTube video for Americans on what not to do when visiting Germany. I was thinking that I would love to live in Germany throughout the video for the reasons you stated.
I don't know German so I am going to assume that a Feierabend is going on a bender with Guy Fieri
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"But, we're like fAmIlY."
Yeah bub, that's not a selling point. I didn't pick them either.
Vin Diesel appears in the corner saying "Uhm... What did you say?" while he is setting up a barbecue at the same time.
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Dudes ready for the office culture.
I cannot tolerate office culture. It's so unbearably insincere and manipulative in my experience.
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I find the trick is to spin what I want to say into somthing positive. I can't lie but I can avoid the questions, or just be vague.
In this situation. "Will you miss us?" (assuming I won't)
"Perhaps we will have the opportunity to work together in the future" (not implying I actually want to)
"So long everyone!"(ignores the question, this may also end the conversation as youve given yourself an out)
"I'm sure I'll meet many new people at my next opportunity" (to them it may imply you where happy to meet them, even if you where not)
In this case, he was never going to see these people again, so no need to play the neurotypical game of lying to spare their feelings.
Fair enough. You never know though. A place that fired me a years back in a city far from where I live now, is now my primary vendor. I need to work with them closely. So I am happy I didn't burn too many bridges on the way out.
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"Perhaps we will have the opportunity to work together in the future."
I couldn't help but read that in a generic Vulcan voice that was a mix of Spock and the "We ain't found shit!" guy.
The "we ain't found shit" guy from Spaceballs was a Vulkan in Star Trek Voyager, Tim Russ played Tuvok. So really, you can read it in just Tuvok's voice.
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This feels like the moment I realized that figuring out a way to say 'thank you' rather than 'I'm sorry' grants +1 CHA
One of my first mentors as a nurse was this old battle axe who had been around in the ER for decades. Tough as nails, hard as a rock. She was pushing morphine in some young girl's IV. This girl was maybe 18 years old and having a good amount of pain, nothing crazy but needing medication. She was really anxious about it. She foolishly asked the question, "What's the worst that could happen?" The nurse answered, "You could die." No expression or sympathy or care. And she just kept on slowly pushing the morphine without another word as the patient visibly tried to suppress her terror.
Jesus what a mind job
That reminded me a bit of that time I was spending the summer at grandparent's and went to the gas station to buy a few things I needed, and saw a magazine special dedicated to a tv show that was really popular with girls at that time, including a dvd and 3d anaglyph glasses. Picked it too.
Cute early 20s girl in the counter: "ohhh, do you like this show?? :D" Me: "no, I'm just buying it for the 3D glasses for using them with Minecraft" girl: "oh okay :/"
me, almost a week later, playing Minecraft at 3 or 4 AM: "wait, was that flirty?"
Should have invited her to play Minecraft
No, show her your Bionicle collection.
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Never ask questions you don't want an honest answer to.
So many managers are convinced their employees need to feel more connected to the business, or miss the office and the team.
It does feel like they want to make you feel at home at work. It's disgusting.
If work feels like home. You had a fucked up childhood and I'm sorry you went through that.
I mean. You feel bad for people just cuz they like their job?
No matter how good your job is, it will never compare to the innocent, carefreeness and happiness you felt when you were in your childhood. (If it was a good one)
This isn't an anti-work sentiment. I love my job.
But it is like comparing having a great death to finding inner peace. Even the worst version of the one is still better than the best version of the other.
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It was the same on Reddit. Antiwork culture or something (I'm not in the loop), which is reasonable to an extent, but people still struggle to acknowledge that it is possible to have careers and jobs that are extremely fulfilling to them, even if it's under a company. I work in healthcare IT and I enjoy it a lot. And I'll even say I enjoy the corpo culture-improving events that IT management holds. I like the people around me. I'd rather work feel like home than feel like slaving away in an emerald mine 8 hours a day.
Edit: I wanna say that at my last job, it was very much trying to get us to feel connected to the company and the profits. That really doesn't get through to me, I couldn't care less about the company lol. If anything at a job, I'll be connected to coworkers and people around me that I spend 8 hours a day with. The best company culture imo isn't to get the employees to simp over the company, but to make it enjoyable for employees to be around each other.
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Hah, I used to be like that in school, but that didn't go well at all. After all those years of having to keep quiet I've kinda lost that ability to be so straightforward. I wish it was normal for people to say what they think even if it isn't nice.
Image Transcription:
X/Twitter post by user merlot mami @KendrasUsername reading: It's our hilarious interns last day. He's autistic and a super straight shooter. My VP asked him in front of everyone on his way out "you gonna miss this place & the people at all?" and he said "Um..no" and walked out.
[I am a human, if I’ve made a mistake please let me know. Please consider providing alt-text for ease of use. Thank you. 💜]
Good human
Thank you, fellow human. 🤖
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"Miss? No need to even take the shot, now."
His "straight shooter" game is Hitscan.
This is often why autistic people don't climb the ranks in technical organisations, even if we are much better at our jobs. Some places create technical specialist roles that are equivalent status but there is a premium on leadership qualities rather than technical excellence.
The Egyptians built the pyramids by moving huge blocks of stone on skids. This was achieved by organising vast amounts of manpower. What they needed was some autistic people to point out that only a handful of people are required if you use some wheels.
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Whats a super straight shooter?
Straight shooter is an idiom meaning honest and straightforward or direct. Super is acting as an intensifier. Combined it means they are extremely honest and direct.
Someone who doesn't lie to protect other people's feelings - AKA they don't "sugarcoat" things.
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Legendary feeling of Catharsis: Definitely worth it.
I just hope he got all the papers he needed before that and a new job in the bag, because doing this without either of these conditions fulfilled can haunt you later.
But I am pretty sure he did.
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