this post was submitted on 02 Jan 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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top 25 comments
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[–] pankkake 100 points 3 days ago (4 children)

Dangerops prangent sex? will it hurt baby top of his head?

[–] ThePyroPython 58 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] maxenmajs 31 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] Damn990099 29 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 days ago (1 children)

How do I know if I'm prengan?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] ZILtoid1991 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

Can I burn a Luigi board?

[–] Benjaben 19 points 3 days ago

PreGANANANT?!?!

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 days ago

Girlfriend aint had period since she got pregat?

[–] Lemminary 18 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Can you down a 20-foot waterfall prengent?

[–] [email protected] 46 points 3 days ago (2 children)

[old joke]

Two men are sitting outside the maternity ward. One guy says to the other, 'first kid?'

'Yes. How about you?'

'This is number seven for us.'

'Seven kids? Wow! Mind if I ask you something? How long after the birth before you start having sex again?'

'Depends on if they give my wife a private room or not."

[–] Kayday 40 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Commenting to appease my anxiety, ignore me if I bother you.

Doctors generally recommend abstaining from sex for 6 weeks after giving birth.

[–] AFKBRBChocolate 50 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Sharing an overly personal story because I think it's funny.

When my first marriage was swirling the drain, and my wife and I hadn't had sex for a number of months, I was visiting my parents, who were in their late 60s at the time. I noticed that my mom kept getting up to go to the bathroom, so I asked my dad if she was okay and he said she had a yeast infection that was bothering her and they didn't know what to do about it. I told him that those were generally pretty easy, she can get a cream that will take care of it in about a week. Not much else to it other than avoid sex for a couple weeks.

My dad looked incredulous. He said "A couple WEEKS? Like two full weeks? No sex at all for TWO WEEKS? If we don't do that, will it go away on its own?" My dad, pushing 70, was having a hard time coming to grips with the thought of going two weeks without sex, while I was in my 20s and hadn't had sex for four or five months.

I remember driving home and thinking, "Well there's something I didn't need to think about."

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 days ago

pops got libido like a teenager

[–] Shou 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Kinda sad he was more concerned about his sex life than his wife's health.

[–] AFKBRBChocolate 6 points 2 days ago

I understand why it looks that way from good reaction, but there was nothing my dad wouldn't have done for my mom. I've never seen two people who loved each other more completely, trusted each other more thoroughly, or gave a bigger priority to each other's happiness. But apparently they had an awful lot of sex.

[–] WereCat 1 points 3 days ago

What if the birth was sold instead?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 days ago (2 children)

On a sadder note, there are a lot of instances of men forcing themselves on their partners who just gave birth. Some nurses do catch them trying to make love in the hospital. But it's usually... not exactly the new mom's idea to do it. Not sure why you would want to bang a torn, soft, expanded, bleeding treasure cave to begin with but ok.

[–] Shou 3 points 2 days ago

That's evil...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

Don't kink shame.

/s

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

Oh haha , sure, but somebody please give the back story for this picture. Why is there a hole in his head?

[–] wabafee 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

If pregnant and having sex would that mean it's a threesome?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago

Also, isn't it illegal at the point?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 days ago

It's a joke, it's not true. In case you took this seriously.