this post was submitted on 11 Oct 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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submitted 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) by [email protected] to c/lemmyshitpost
 
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[โ€“] [email protected] 101 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

I remember having to crack the PIN code to access the locked channels (which would just give me access to things like skinemax late at night). I faked sick one day to stay home and set to work. I think there was a short timeout after a few failed attempts, so you could only go so fast. It only took 852 tries but I got it! It was 0852, which was just a straight line up the keypad ๐Ÿ˜‘

[โ€“] [email protected] 59 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

That's way more dedication to a nut then I've ever had

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[โ€“] Holyginz 28 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Hearing this let's me realize how lucky I was in this regard. I got a PSP when I was young and either my parents didn't know it had an internet browser or they didn't know it was a fully fleshed out browser.

[โ€“] Passerby6497 12 points 3 weeks ago

I grew up on AOL, and the day I figured out internet explorer allowed me to access the Internet outside of their locked down kids mode was glorious.

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[โ€“] Outhouse_dayz 97 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Make sure to hit last, channel up, last. Foolish proof. I'll never get caught.

[โ€“] [email protected] 42 points 3 weeks ago

This guy faps.

[โ€“] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago

Here I thought I was the only one this clever.

[โ€“] weegee90 75 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[โ€“] [email protected] 70 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

My dad got these black market cable boxes from one of his less than reputable friends way back when. We got literally everything, including full porn channels that weren't scrambled. They were technically blocked by my parents, but the family pincode was well known.

I used to watch the porn channels and never could figure out why they were so... Meh for me. Turns out, very gay. Lol

Once my parents split up we didn't have those boxes anymore, and I used to watch Cat House and went through the same "why is this so frustratingly close to being good" experience lol

[โ€“] Entropywins 26 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Quick question...was straight porn like ew gross or just not interesting? I find your porn story really funny and hope I don't offend by saying so.

[โ€“] [email protected] 25 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

No, not gross. Before I knew I was gay it more frustrating than anything. Like, I knew this was sexual, I knew I wanted to enjoy it, and I knew it made me horny. But it wasn't enough to cross than line into, like, getting me there and being enjoyable. It wasn't until I found my brother's porn magazines that I really enjoyed porn, and that was because of the guys in it, and a few erotic stories in them written from women's POV. I still didn't realize I was gay or that it was the guys getting me there until one day, when I was like 13/14 and I had a blackberry. I found a site that had nude pictures of celebrities (some blog, not like a dedicated site), and there were (I'm assuming fake) nudes or Kirk Cameron on a boat. OMG, I got off so hard, and then went into full panic when I realized what that meant. Spent the next few years trying to figure out how to undo it. Lol.

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[โ€“] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

I do believe it was a 4001 Diode soldered between pins 5 and 7; got everything but HBO...

Used to have all my friends over for the WWF pay-per-views.

[โ€“] Grabthar 46 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Had C-band satellite as a teen. All the good channels locked. But if the satellite Spacenet 1 transponder 18 was locked, you could "fine tune" the reception from say, Galaxy 3 transponder 18 by holding the step up or down button, and manually swing the dish halfway across the sky to the same position where Spacenet 1 is. As the descrambler thinks you are watching a different satellite altogether, there is no more lock. And since you never actually visited a bad channel, no way to tell with history or last buttons.

[โ€“] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

How did you even find this out?

[โ€“] Grabthar 25 points 3 weeks ago

We knew that if you pressed the satellite button and channel up/down, it let you manually move the dish, and it didn't care how long you did it. There were also numbers to indicate the position of the dish. The rest was just sheer determination.

[โ€“] [email protected] 18 points 3 weeks ago

Desperation

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[โ€“] FardyCakes 42 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[โ€“] [email protected] 26 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Yeah but if you were watching Nick at nite the whole time, why did the channel number flick on the screen for a second?

[โ€“] FardyCakes 21 points 3 weeks ago

I switched away during the cash for gold commercial

[โ€“] bulwark 32 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Real Sex always seemed so not sexy. I mean, I'd watch it for boobs as a kid, but I was always kind of turned off by the whole show, idk.

[โ€“] [email protected] 31 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
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[โ€“] FlyingSquid 30 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

My dad was a film historian, so we had HBO, Cinemax and Showtime in case anything came on that he needed to tape to show to a class.

This was quite helpful to teenage me in the era before internet porn.

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[โ€“] [email protected] 28 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

You fool, mother could also just hit "last" and catch you in both deceit AND boobin

[โ€“] [email protected] 26 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Not if Nickelodeon is right next to Cartoon Network. You hit "last" and then change the channel. That also gives you cover for why you're holding the remote and changing channels.

[โ€“] bizzle 8 points 3 weeks ago

60 and 59, bro ๐Ÿ˜Ž

[โ€“] Grimy 26 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

This is what I was trying to get off too. A few years later, I found out the art channel would sometimes play dirty movies on Saturday late at night but they usually involved incest(?). Then I switched to music channels when they started showing provocative music video so that was nice. I had one of those little tvs with the vcr integrated. Good times.

[โ€“] Itdidnttrickledown 19 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Should have bought a subscription to Radio and Electronics. I built a descrambler using their schematics.

Holy crap some of it still exists. https://schematicsforfree.com/files/Video/Circuits/Descrambling/1984-02%20Analog%20Cable%20TV%20Descramblng%20.pdf

[โ€“] Grimy 10 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Ha, knowing about this would have probably changed my life in more ways then one. I would have started my career as a hobby and saved a lot more time.

And God knows I would have been serious about learning this stuff as a teen if there was free porn at the end of it.

[โ€“] Itdidnttrickledown 12 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Its amazing I didn't end up in jail. I built a few of the descramblers and worst of all ended up with a 300 baud modem when the local chevrolet place Threw out a bunch of 'junk'. It was a non hayes bell modem and a pain in the ass to use but I would have taken a bullet for it. I built a blue box and later a black box. Then I got busy with free phone calls. Phreaking BBS's all over with great plans on taking control of the world around you. I still remember the date that they replaced the old analog switch in my town.

[โ€“] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

I hear phreaking stories and I'm sad I was born a decade too late :(

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[โ€“] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

In Canada, we had "Bleu Nuit". It was on at 2am, Saturday night, and played racy French movies. The only problem was the movies ran the gamut from 1.5 hour long naked lesbian makeout to a single scene with boobies somewhere in the middle. You took your chances. I swear there was one that didn't even show anything (but probably talked about sex. Dunno, I don't speak much French.)

[โ€“] [email protected] 20 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

y'all remember that vcr trick that you could unscramble all the PPV channels.... golden times... golden times.

[โ€“] [email protected] 25 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)

Wait. what black magic is this? 12 year old me desperately wants to know.

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[โ€“] ivanafterall 16 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

...and the mirror on the bedroom door set so that I could see who's coming down the hall.

[โ€“] skibidi 19 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

But if you could see them, they could see you ...

[โ€“] Dearth 11 points 3 weeks ago

But you were in the dark, camouflaged in your bedding. Anyone coming down the hall was a silhouette against the white walls of the hallway.

[โ€“] SidewaysHighways 12 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)
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[โ€“] Idreamofcheesy 12 points 3 weeks ago

Here I am watching scrambled Sex and the City, wondering when it will get to the good part.

[โ€“] d00ery 8 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Eurotrash was an option in the UK for those without any satellite.

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[โ€“] hactar42 7 points 3 weeks ago

I always set the last button to the TV guide channel. It made it less suspicious if they saw the channel change. Or at least that's what I reasoned.

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