this post was submitted on 04 Oct 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 398 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

For those who don't get it, the joke is diabetes causes unmetabolized sugar to end up in your urine.

[–] saltesc 85 points 3 months ago (7 children)

Oooooh...

Sometimes my piss smells like sugar, but it often smells like a lot of things. Usually piss. Sometimes asparagus.

[–] [email protected] 98 points 3 months ago (4 children)

guys stop smelling your own piss just flush it

[–] [email protected] 46 points 3 months ago (1 children)

If it can help to alert you to a potential medical issue and then you go see the doctor; I don’t see it as bad thing.

I’ve tasted my own piss before to see if it was sweet.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Well don't leave us hanging. Was it?

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 months ago (2 children)

It was not. It was rather bland actually but I do be hydrated all the time.

[–] slaacaa 19 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Need to try again next week, don’t give up so easily

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Why next week? We need daily samples.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] repungnant_canary 9 points 3 months ago (3 children)

It's actually beneficial for controlling your health to monitor piss and poo. Not to obsessively investigate it. But just to know what's normal for you so you know when to worry.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Very much this. You don't have to eat all of it, a tablespoon or two to taste is enough.

[–] Whitebrow 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Is there another way besides scooping it from the bowl? I don’t like when the dirty toilet water touches my spoon

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Hence the "poop shelf" which has taken over toilets in the last decade

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[–] tfw_no_toiletpaper 16 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] EtherWhack 8 points 3 months ago

I've gotten top ramen before, same with apple jacks.

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[–] mvirts 7 points 3 months ago

Get yo self a glucometer if you're thinking about it, diabeetus is real obvious once you start using the right tools. Also they're super cheap these days.

[–] finitebanjo 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

It can be other things than diabetes as well, like an infection or liver failure.

[–] marx2k 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Hopefully you were in the bathroom when you relieved yourself.

I know I was.

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[–] tacosplease 5 points 3 months ago

Mine frequently smells like whatever meat I ate, especially after eating a couple chili dogs or smoked meat.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Could be artificial sweeteners.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Everyone’s talking about the smell, but I’m thinking about the colour after I eat a bunch of beets

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Living amongst avid beet eaters, I never noticed a color change. Guess i metabolize beets particularly well, which is neat.

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[–] [email protected] 112 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (8 children)

Imagine being a piss kink enjoyer and finding out your SO has diabetes (or is pregnant) because their piss tastes like straight sugar water.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

like straight sugar water.

Like an Edgar suit

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 3 months ago (3 children)

I think that's how they used to diagnose some illnesses. Makes you wonder if some docs had a piss kink or if they were just super commited to helping people out.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I mean, you can drink my piss if it ends up potentially beneficial to me. Any takers? I'd send you a vial of a time of day of your chosing.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (4 children)

you can even make money off it if you find the right piss enthusiasts lol

(if you live in the US, don't send it via US Postal Service, as shipping bodily fluids is illegal)

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[–] RubberElectrons 6 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Crazier still, for the wealthy, boiling down piss was how they'd measure your sugar level back in the 20s through 40s. Ugh.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I'm sure there were at least a few for whom it was both lol

[–] Clinicallydepressedpoochie 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

I'm an educated man, no I will not drink piss. Ron come in here and drink this piss.

[–] tacosplease 27 points 3 months ago

I saw a story like that on reddit once. Dude was going through medical school. Had a FWB who was getting into squirting. He noticed it tasted sweet and told her to get checked for diabetes. She was prediabetic if I remember correctly.

[–] marx2k 24 points 3 months ago
[–] Benjaben 11 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Wtf. Just finished a doc on comedian Patrice O'Neil and he makes this joke about himself lol

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[–] bitjunkie 10 points 3 months ago

I'd rather not imagine it but you already made me

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
  • piss enjoyer
  • yiffit.net
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[–] psycho_driver 100 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Anon can enjoy sugary beverages all day every day for the rest of their life!

[–] lgmjon64 83 points 3 months ago (2 children)

And lose weight with every amputation

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago (1 children)

My Wikipedia bugged out and I got this lmao

[–] Aermis 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Why is there a picture of Stevie wonder next to maple syrup disease

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

That's my man Isaac Hayes (Chef from South Park and a musician)

His page was the last thing I was looking at on Wikipedia before I clicked the above link. Looks like the app just retained the image from the previous article.

[–] Podunk 8 points 3 months ago

Its just beetus. Anon is just a dummy.

[–] finitebanjo 4 points 3 months ago

Or liver failure.

Or a serious infection.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

But did they taste it to confirm?

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