this post was submitted on 06 Sep 2024
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[–] [email protected] 54 points 2 months ago (1 children)

If I go there will be trouble.

If I stay it will be double.

[–] bitchkat 1 points 2 months ago

It's the white man in Hammersmith Palais

[–] [email protected] 41 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Always go pee. Yes, it's annoying as hell to crawl out of the comfy bed again. But it's even more annoying to wake up a couple hours later with an even fuller bladder - or even worse, to wake up with an emptier bladder.

[–] Cris_Color 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

Sometimes on the toilet, sometimes in his bed. Everything in moderation.

[–] Resol 5 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)

Am I the only one who ends up peeing in the dream, only to wake up with a wet bed?

No, that is not a joke, despite how disgusting it sounds.

Edit: nevermind, the reply thread right above me mentioned that someone else might've done this.

[–] blanketswithsmallpox 7 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)

It's common enough when younger. It stops in teenage years to middle age, then starts again in old age.

Do some kegels to firm up that pelvic floor. Drink less water before bed. If you can, remember pissing in dream means pissing in bed. Wake yourself up before you mark the sheets like every drunk lush of a woman I've slept with.

[–] ettyblatant 3 points 2 months ago

drunk lush of a woman

I am certainly not here to be all like MEN DO IT TOO but I felt the need to drop an anecdote about a lead singer in a band I toured with once. He only drank black label beer, no liquor. He blacked out every night and pissed all the beds he met lol

[–] Cypher 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

like every drink lush of woman

Is this aneurysm posting?

[–] blanketswithsmallpox 3 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Is this aneurysm posting?

Phone spellcheck blows now lol. Tanks.

[–] Resol 2 points 2 months ago

I'll take that advice into consideration.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I had to learn to remember this within the dream and to forcibly wake myself up from it to stop this happening. Which I think is quite an accomplishment, if I may say so myself.

I suspect it goes back to wearing nappies/diapers as a baby. Babies naturally try to wait until they are unclothed to relieve themselves; they essentially have to learn how to go in a nappy, or else let it happen because they can't hold it in any longer. Then they have unlearn this with potty training. It's crazy really.

[–] Resol 1 points 2 months ago

Crazy indeed.

[–] bitchkat 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

My sister had a pad thst goes under her sheets that when it got wet it rang an alarm and she had to chart the piss puddle.

She hasn't wet the bed for 50 years.

[–] Resol 1 points 2 months ago

I heard theodd1sout talk about this at some point.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

I've often risked it. So far haven't had the accident happen. Can't be arsed to go every time since it takes me a while to fall back asleep if I get up

[–] [email protected] 27 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Thank God for the emoji. I wasn't sure how to react to this image

[–] rustyfish 4 points 2 months ago

Am I supposed to cry screaming?

[–] LouNeko 19 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Pee a little, let it dry, pee a little, let it dry...

[–] DarkCloud 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Just roll over lift the bllanket a little, and pee into the kiddie pool you keep next to your bed for late night peeing, and early morning foot baths, don't people know it prevents athletes foot?

[–] wreckedcarzz 4 points 2 months ago

Horrible day to have eyes

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

Listen, we can't all have the bladder control of a perfectly sculpted Greek God - ok?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Why not both? "But how?!", I hear you say. With a magical device known as a catheter, of course! Simply insert the receiving tube into your urethra and then go to sleep knowing you won't wake up in a puddle of your own leavings.

[–] Harvey656 10 points 2 months ago

I also prefer sounding before bed!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

We all know we fight it for quite some time before eventually relenting, then wonder why we didn't relent hours earlier.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Hours?? It is just minutes of thinking for me

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

All those things sleep experts tell you to do in order to fall asleep faster and sleep more soundly? Pee should be ~~at the top~~ in the middle of the list, right before the part where you get ensconced under the covers.

Edit: if you get up for a crying baby, pee again before you go. It might go back to sleep, but mostly, once you pick it up you'll not get another chance to pee, maybe for hours.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

lol this only gets worse. just wait until you're over 40

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

The question is not whether to do one or the other, but rather the sequence of tasks.

[–] danc4498 6 points 2 months ago

That’s me at 4 am trying to fight the urge and go back to sleep, knowing full well my body woke me up cause I had to pee.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Counterpoint: sleep and pee. You think you are better than mice? Pssh.

[–] drunkpostdisaster 1 points 2 months ago

I think I'll just piss myself and never get out of bed again.

[–] Sniatch 1 points 2 months ago

Thats me everytime I forgot to unload my washing machine.

[–] wonderfulvoltaire 1 points 2 months ago
[–] Crashumbc 1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Get older, get comfortable, falling asleep and remember you forgot to pee.

Wake up now and go pee?

Or

Fall asleep knowing you'll wake up at 3 am having to pee really bad?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

My asshole body: yeah I know you peed before bed but it's 2 hours before you need to be awake so you need to pee now. Oh the time you went to bed changed and the time you need to be up changed? Doesn't matter, 2 hours before you need to be up I'll wake you up to pee. Good luck getting back to sleep!

[–] TrickDacy 0 points 2 months ago

...you become 12?