this post was submitted on 04 Sep 2024
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[–] The_Picard_Maneuver 107 points 1 month ago (3 children)

There's a bishop 500m away with a sniper too.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

and he always visits the scene of the crime after

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The sniper is loaded with a space warp bullet.
When the bullet lodges into the enemy, being potentially healable (if the enemy bishop were to turn priest), the bishop activates the warp, taking the place of the bullet and ripping out of the enemy's body, making sure the body is unusable and making the priest useless.

And that's why we don't have a priest in chess.

CC BY-NC-SA 4.0

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[–] aeronmelon 10 points 1 month ago

A Super Soaker filled with holy water.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

That was a balancing patch. It used to be that bishops could only see only 2 squares and could jump over like horses.

[–] Furbag 3 points 1 month ago

smdh Chess hasn't had a balance patch in like 200 years.

nerf knights plz chess.com

[–] Theprogressivist 85 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] jelloeater85 24 points 1 month ago
[–] TheBat 50 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Fun fact: rooks are elephant, bishops are camels, and queen is vizier in most Indian languages.

[–] Viking_Hippie 21 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

Other fun facts in This article, of which my favorite parts are the maps and their titles:

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Do the pieces look different or are they just called a different thing? Like what's a 'jumper'?

[–] Viking_Hippie 9 points 1 month ago

They look the same. A "jumper", or "springer" in Danish, is just a differently named "knight".

[–] Wizard_Pope 8 points 1 month ago

The second one is inaccurate for Slovenia at least. Both horse and jumper are in use.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (9 children)

No.. Rooks are chariots Bishops are elephant and Queen is literally queen ml/in

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[–] Klear 33 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That queen's hanging, tho. He can just beat her himself.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

There is nothing to indicate she isn't defended.

[–] Buddahriffic 6 points 1 month ago

Next frame could be a horse walking up and smashing that tower.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I'd never questioned it before now, but ... How come the towers move? Who had that idea?

The jesters moving diagonally because they're whimsical I guess but the towers are quite odd.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 month ago (3 children)

jesters? they're bishops...

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sorry. Did a direct translation of the French name without thinking.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] wieson 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

And in German they're "Runners"

[–] apolo399 4 points 1 month ago

I'll add Spanish! "Alfil", taken from arabic "(al-)fil", taken from persian "pil", meaning "the elephant", since at some point in the past the piece was, evidently, an elephant.

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[–] sheogorath 4 points 1 month ago

Potato potato

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You may look a bit beyond the edge of the anglophone world.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

well in my language they're "runners" so i guess i should have thought a bit harder there...

[–] Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In 34 points 1 month ago

The rook was initially a chariot.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Okay since nobody did a serious answer, here we go:

tl;dr: its a translation/interpretation error.

The first documented forms of chess are all "war machines" of their time the tower was a Charioteer.

When chess hits Europe someone translated charioteer with tower. Idk why, maybe because the used figures looked like a tower.

And a charioteer move on a battlefield would be a storming through everything in one direction.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I kinda wish we'd kept the name chariot. It sounds more epic.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Towers are made of stone

[–] nexguy 14 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] Exusia 9 points 1 month ago

But when is the boobs update

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

This was magnificent!

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Sacrifice DA QUEEN

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

/pedantry

It's not checkmate then, now it's it.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

I See a body check, Mate.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Well, she did only say check.

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[–] MewtwoLikesMemes 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] MewtwoLikesMemes 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

OP really should've provided this source.

For shame. smh...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sharing a cropped version too.

[–] MewtwoLikesMemes 2 points 1 month ago

Seriously.

Rude.

[–] MewtwoLikesMemes 9 points 1 month ago

"Horses can't be knights. I mean, that's just silly. Chess is stupid!"

[–] olivertzeng 4 points 1 month ago
[–] Sam_Bass 3 points 1 month ago

Get thee to a rookery

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