this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2024
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Political Weirdos

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[–] [email protected] 97 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 98 points 3 months ago (3 children)

7.74 inches was my favorite hint that it is satire.

[–] Anticorp 50 points 3 months ago (6 children)

You don't measure your penis with a digital depth gauge?

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 months ago

Only when sounding

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Everybody knows real men measure their penises in metric

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Implied +/- 10 thou accuracy isn't appropriate.

[–] danekrae 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

In my case, that would be the difference between nonexistence or double size.

[–] Tyfud 12 points 3 months ago

Yeah, exactly. This is pure satire.

That it's near indistinguishable from reality at this point, is a tragedy.

[–] [email protected] 70 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Measuring your penis down to the hundredth of an inch; totally not insecure at all.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Lists penis length to hundredths of an inch, won't list height, only posts selfies of himself sitting down.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It's clear from the text he's 5'7"

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

This is clever, I had to look again and literally laughed out loud when I saw it.

[–] barsquid 46 points 3 months ago (2 children)

One thing turning people off is certainly that they're imagining they have hundreths of an inch accuracy instead of just writing 7 3/4.

[–] TexasDrunk 8 points 3 months ago

The more accurate the number looks the more realer it is! That's stience, you rube!

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[–] asmodee59 43 points 3 months ago (9 children)

The fuck is atlanto-mediterannean ?

[–] FlyingSquid 62 points 3 months ago

He wants to say he’s white, but not one of those swarthy Greeks or Italians that make his bloodline impure.

[–] mEEGal 26 points 3 months ago

sigh he's from Atlantis

[–] norimee 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)

If I remember right, there are only 3 countries that have coastlines at the Mediterranean Sea AND the Atlantic ocean. Spain, France and Morocco.

My guess is, he uses such a weird definition because he is North African but wants to highlight his not being brown, because that doesn't go well with his white supremacy.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

all three of those being famous for their pale complexions, of course.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

Doesn't matter because nobody is applying to be his girlfriend.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] JustZ 3 points 3 months ago

Oooo that true. Don't forget the Rock.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

There's a certain level of racist that gets really involved in classifying humans into small subcategories so they can know how racist they should be to each one. Used to be popular with "scientific racism" in the 19th century, but you don't see it much anymore.

It's extra weird.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

If I had to guess, after seeing this weird shit and watching too much pseudo-archaology debunking stuff lately: he means the descendants of the Mediterranean and Atlantian people. There's a crazy group of people who think Atlantis is real, and either had a worldwide advanced culture, or at least through the Mediterranean.

The Atlantis myth was heavily accepted by the Nazis as the ancestors of the Aryan people, which is why the Aryans are "so much better" than everyone else. It is still a popular tool to belittle ancient people and to say their accomplishments had to be done instead by this white Atlantian group instead.

[–] Anticorp 4 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

It means one of their grandparents is from Italy, otherwise it'd be "Northern European".

[–] cybersandwich 38 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I refuse to believe this isn't a hilarious joke account.

[–] Retrograde 14 points 3 months ago

Yeah this shit reads like an onion article lol

[–] samus12345 6 points 3 months ago

Probably, but then, there are people out there that would unironically post shit like this.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

Anyone here ever play Disco Elysium? That Atlanto-Mediterranean sounds like something Measurehead would say.

[–] metallic_substance 7 points 3 months ago

I'd be willing to wager that the Venn diagram of Lemmy users and people who have played it is basically just a circle

[–] BigPotato 5 points 3 months ago

OCCIDENTAL HAPLOGROUP B4 IS DONE GIVING ORDERS AROUND HERE. THE INFLUENCE OF THE "HAM SANDWICH RACE" IS WANING.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 months ago

"Ancap" 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

[–] JustZ 27 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Wtf is wrong with this dude.

Obsessed with comparison.

E: if anyone reading this has intrusive thoughts of comparing yourself to others, stop that shit. Comparison to others is a killer of all joy, and nobody cares except you.

[–] FlyingSquid 16 points 3 months ago

He learned it from Daddy Trump.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago (4 children)

I thought inches didn't convert easily to decimal...?

[–] FlyingSquid 32 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I love that he’s rounded it to two decimal places. As if a woman would say, “7.7? That’s it?”

[–] kinsnik 13 points 3 months ago (2 children)

yeah, there is no way the measurement instrument was precise enough to make that last decimal significant

[–] grue 11 points 3 months ago

He just wants to filter out all the women who understand sig figs because he can't handle dating someone smarter or more educated than him.

Also, if he was going to measure in fucking inches he should've just called it "3/4"

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

He measured on a heartbeat to ensure it was as big as possible

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

during high tide

[–] radicalautonomy 12 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

I love that he included his penis size at all. As if a woman would say, "Oh finally, a man who is letting me know the important details I really care about."

[–] norimee 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

His second message after saying "Hi" is probably a dick pic.

[–] Omgpwnies 5 points 3 months ago

with the calipers to prove his measurement

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[–] disguy_ovahea 14 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Digital calipers use decimal inches rather than fractional. I’m guessing that was what he used to measure himself.

[–] Anticorp 13 points 3 months ago

I'm thinking he used his eyes and threw out a number that he liked.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

After reading this, I want to convert his inches with my left foot

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

This is one place where the metric system really shines. If I say I'm 6.5", it sounds like I'm desperate for that last half inch. If I say I'm 17cm, that's just what it is.

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[–] radicalautonomy 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Willing to settle for minarchist...

Based on the rest of this prick's ad, there's a nigh 100% chance he is a menarchist (ephebophile).

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