this post was submitted on 23 May 2024
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You think people do that? Go on the internet and tell lies?

top 25 comments
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[–] whaleross 81 points 6 months ago (1 children)

The Zuck has not been 36 since he shed his baby skin some 800 years ago.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Didn't his people seed life on Earth millions of years ago then fuck off into space and eventually create the Xenomorphs?

[–] db2 8 points 6 months ago

If so then he's the dudblood of the species.

[–] Diplomjodler3 59 points 6 months ago (3 children)

I also heard he likes to strangle kittens. But don't quote me on that.

[–] Darkard 49 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I also heard he likes to strangle kittens.

  • Diplomjodler3
[–] Diplomjodler3 20 points 6 months ago
[–] LemmyKnowsBest 27 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"Don't quote me on that."

-Diplomjodler3

[–] Klear 13 points 6 months ago (1 children)

“Don’t quote me on that.”

-Diplomjodler3

- Michael Scott

[–] jaybone 2 points 6 months ago

You kill 100% of the kittens you don’t strangle.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 30 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Fake news. It wasn’t Covid, it was autoerotic asphyxiation.

[–] hakunawazo 14 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Get out of my head. Came here to say this

[–] [email protected] 22 points 6 months ago

Don't give us hope

[–] BonesOfTheMoon 14 points 6 months ago (1 children)

They shipped his remains to his home planet Zorg.

[–] Thcdenton 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] jaybone 2 points 6 months ago

He’s okay I guess.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago

I'm happy that things around the world are improving, i am not one missed paycheck from death, and they used that giant fan to get rid of climate change...

[–] bazus1 10 points 6 months ago

Kinda makes me wish I had a facebook account to just go ham with fake "RIP Zuk" posts.

[–] Mark12870 10 points 6 months ago

RIP Mark Zuckerberg †2020.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

"But, that would cost money!" - Zucc

[–] Sam_Bass 5 points 6 months ago

Do androids get flesh diseases?

[–] MedicPigBabySaver 4 points 6 months ago

I wish he were.