Drink some oil as well. Partially to displace the stomach acid, but also to allow for the kernels to pop.
this post was submitted on 25 Mar 2024
624 points (98.1% liked)
memes
8588 readers
1395 users here now
Community rules
1. Be civil
No trolling, bigotry or other insulting / annoying behaviour
2. No politics
This is non-politics community. For political memes please go to [email protected]
3. No recent reposts
Check for reposts when posting a meme, you can only repost after 1 month
4. No bots
No bots without the express approval of the mods or the admins
5. No Spam/Ads
No advertisements or spam. This is an instance rule and the only way to live.
Sister communities
- [email protected] : Star Trek memes, chat and shitposts
- [email protected] : Lemmy Shitposts, anything and everything goes.
- [email protected] : Linux themed memes
- [email protected] : for those who love comic stories.
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
And salt and butter. No one likes plain popcorn.
Also roll and eat an alloy wrap so you can take the rest home without it getting cold.
...corpsecorn?
This thread has some of the best medical advice I’ve ever found on the interwebs
How is pappcorm formed?
Am i percornate? How does girl become precornt?
with poopcorns
Can have "insert-pickle" for taste will touch top od poplxorn kurnls?
Would you need oil with body fat rendering?
And shove a stick of dynamite up Your ass. Not necessarily before you die.
I heard something about pacemakers occasionally being left in bodies by mistake, and becoming small bombs in the crematorium ovens. That's gotta be a trip, the first time you hear that shit.
And then you probably have to get the oven inspected, to make sure the incident didn't damage the gas lines. And that probably costs at LEAST a few thousand dollars. And probably tens of thousands, if something does need to be fixed. So, like, I'm pretty sure the boss is only going to let one of those slide, maximum, before you're out on your ass.
Or take out each heart and yell Kalima! No way to miss the pacemaker this way I think.
/S
Now you're thinkin'.
The body is often "prepared" for the funeral before it is cremated, so tape a couple hundred dollars to your chest with a note asking the preparer to leave your guts intact. Usually an underpaid apprentice does this, so there's a chance they'll go for it.
Someone apprentices at crematorium?
An old coworker of mine at some part-time gig went to school and studied "Mortuary Science". Absolutely fascinated me. He had a second job at a crematorium where he was an apprentice.
After him telling me that, I realized that I never thought about how someone got into that field. Never really considered someone going to school to do this as a career (which now I realize is obvious, but I never connected the dots).
Always assumed people working at a crematorium or a cemetery was a cliche old decrepit guy.
Hm. At first I thought this was a Linux meme.
The guy's face when OP OD'd on Linux Kernels, RIP
Also maybe see if you can wolf down an entire pickle. The cremator may be a pickle-with-popcorn kind of fella.
Is that a thing? I've never tried eating pickles with popcorn. But now I'm kinda curious.
Unless it's just code for some weird sex act. Then, probably not. I don't want to lick anybody's briny dong.
Would you want your kernel popped
He wants the oiliest seed, am I right?
Gotta ask for consent first, this is discussed on make some noise BTW.
No code here, although that's hilarious.
I would imagine it's too wet and would boil instead of popping
Popping is boiling, but you need the area around the kernel to be hotter than boiling. Outside you need oil.
So really, you’d need to shotgun blast them into your own belly fat to accomplish cremation popcorn.
Or drink a slurry of peanut oil full of popcorn kernels.
Jesus christ I’m on a list now
I like practical thinkers !
Make sure you chug some oil so the popcorn actually pops and doesnt burn
And this is the reason for death in the first place.
Is this viable?
Popcorn pops at about 180°C, and execution by electric chair apparently gets you to 100°C, so no.
THIS IS SOME GOOD SPAGHETTI BROH
Soooo ... Corn ? 🌽🌽🌽
Actually no, popcorn’s a specific breed of corn. I think. Small enough kernels to withstand pressure longer or something like that.