this post was submitted on 18 Mar 2024
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Science Memes

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[–] [email protected] 58 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Bonobos have it all figured out.
Something scary happened a few trees over? Sex!
A logging vehicle spotted in the distance? Giggity!
Little timmy fell down the well? ❤️
Some hairless ape left an empty cardboard box on the ground? Cue the porn groove.
Chimpanzees encroaching on you territory? Let's outbreed them!

EDIT: The downvotes are from chimpanzees.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest 3 points 10 months ago

I wonder how they have time to accomplish anything else in life

I also wonder how long their refractory period is.

[–] then_three_more 31 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 20 points 10 months ago (1 children)

both species live in social groups that exhibit both sexual and violent behaviors.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Mafuckas read 'Sex at Dawn' and think they got it all figured out. And then they try to get their friends to swing with them.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

Or read Palahniuk and want their friends to swing on them.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 10 months ago

There's probably some MF DOOM lines that'd fit with that

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Violent sex

Problem solved

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Instructions unclear, Slaanesh is telling me to use more car battery clamps, they aren't specifying how or what to use them for

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Given that free love experiments have generally failed in human history, while limitless violence experiments are a roaring success, I think I know which way humans have gone.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

Bonobos, knowing that ACAB, didn't have a CIA to invent HIV.

[–] paddirn 10 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

Everyone belongs to everyone.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

It's funny because it's true?

[–] marcos 10 points 10 months ago

Well, it's not really true. Both of those descriptions are highly flawed.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (2 children)
[–] Im_old 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Glad I'm not the only one thinking that! Bot if I had to choose is sex of course!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

...Yeah... Of course...

I mean you can combine both, ever heard about guro?

[–] Im_old 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

for the sake of argument and plausible deniability let's assume I don't. Any good pointers to look up?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Its basically snuf porn but hentai, you don't want to. Its best described as very violent necrophilia.

[–] GraniteM 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Do you want Cenobites? Because that's how you get Cenobites.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago
[–] BrokenGlepnir 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] yetiftw 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)

that's half of the joke, good job!

[–] BrokenGlepnir 8 points 10 months ago

I had bonobos confused with gibbons for a few hours, so I think that's why it didn't match up right for me.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

Both, but it doesn’t work

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago