this post was submitted on 25 Jan 2024
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[–] lawrence 159 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (31 children)

The correct way is to lie on your side, facing left. Because prevents gastric acid in esophagus.

edit for clarification: This method is efficient primarily when the lower esophageal sphincter (I had to Google the correct name) is not functioning as intended.

[–] PrefersAwkward 130 points 9 months ago (3 children)

When will these bugs be fixed? I prefer to face to the right and would also like to be able to sleep on my stomach

[–] cm0002 93 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The GitHub human branch maintainer peaced out forever ago, all attempts to establish communications aren't going so well and the issue tracker is piling up...so probably never

[–] [email protected] 47 points 9 months ago (6 children)

I mean if it's abandonware it's ethical to reverse engineer and open source the reverse engineered platform, maybe even fork it and provide some sort of extensible framework for various plugins, or convert the kernel to a new architecture or even virtualize it. Hopefully we can also work out the bugs and the more glaring issues soon (looking at you, upright vertebrae).

[–] cm0002 25 points 9 months ago

We're working on it, but the mf was on something, have you seen the digestive system class? Or the central nervous system class?

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 9 months ago (10 children)

Some people have mirrored internal organs, so this advice may be the ophosite for you. But also, if it ain't broke don't fix it, sleep however's comfiest for you and lets you get the best sleep you can

[–] [email protected] 20 points 9 months ago (6 children)
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[–] [email protected] 34 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

False. The correct way to sleep is on a 7-11 sausage roller set to high speed.

  • The heat lamp creates warmth which you normally substitute with a dangerous choking blanket
  • the high-speed spinning flings off your sweat to keep you cool using Bernoulli's Principle instead of energy-hungry and dangerous fans or AC units
  • the constant flow of vomit and other effluvia helps you maintain a healthy figure instead of ridiculously augmenting your life with the high-risk activity of "exercise."
[–] SeabassDan 28 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The throat anus, for those not used to the medical terminology.

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[–] creditCrazy 25 points 9 months ago (4 children)

I'm curious how accurate this is considering there's rarely ever air in your stomach so what is the point when it's effectively vacuum sealed.

[–] mihnt 22 points 9 months ago (5 children)

As a side sleeper with GERD. It's accurate as fuck. Before I found a medication that worked properly, I always slept on my left side.

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[–] edgemaster72 18 points 9 months ago

You sleep on your left side to avoid gastric acid in the esophagus.

I sleep on my left side because sleeping on the right side angers up my sciatica.

We are not the same.

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[–] ekZepp 121 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (9 children)
[–] Zenjal 38 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Floating in the diaper tank

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[–] [email protected] 99 points 9 months ago (9 children)

Sleeping on matter is detrimental to your health. To avoid back problems, learn how to sleep while levitating 3 feet off the floor.

[–] Ross_audio 20 points 9 months ago (4 children)

I genuinely sleep in a hammock and have done now for years.

It's not levitation but it is great.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago

Sorry, but sleeping in levitation has been found to be detrimental to your health, you need to sleep in a 0g environment

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[–] painfulasterisk 92 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Don't sleep, it's bad for you . Just keep working.

-*CEOs

*Typo fixed.

[–] morphballganon 44 points 9 months ago (1 children)

CEOs*

No apostrophe in a non-possessive plural noun

[–] motor_spirit 25 points 9 months ago

Go ahead and cc everybody on this one, it's needed.

[–] HRDS_654 73 points 9 months ago

Bold of you to assume I can control how my body moves while I'm asleep.

[–] [email protected] 68 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You need to be slowly turned on a rotisserie.

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[–] cley_faye 67 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Living is a disease at this point.

[–] Stegget 58 points 9 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago (5 children)
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[–] RizzRustbolt 54 points 9 months ago (8 children)

I sleep suspended in a vat of gel medium.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago

NOT RECOMMENDED

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[–] [email protected] 48 points 9 months ago

i go to bed laying on my side, turn to slep on my stomach, then on my back, and once i'm actually asleep i look like this:

animated gif of a tesseract

[–] FlyingSquid 44 points 9 months ago (4 children)

You know what's fun? The post-surgery "you always sleep on this side? Learn to sleep on the other one because you're going to be this way for weeks, motherfucker" sleeping position.

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[–] jordanlund 41 points 9 months ago (3 children)
[–] AlijahTheMediocre 34 points 9 months ago (1 children)

A guy died in a cave from being stuck in this position.

[–] EtherWhack 20 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] Axiochus 16 points 9 months ago

That's one way of putty it.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 9 months ago

The ball flattener 3000!

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[–] rustydomino 35 points 9 months ago (7 children)

Sleeping on my back is soooo relaxing... when I can fall asleep. For some reason I have the hardest time falling asleep on my back, but when it does happen it's bliss.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I literally can’t fall asleep on my back lol. I can lay there for an hour and then the minute I roll over on my side or stomach I’ll fall asleep.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I sleep on my side. I can't sleep on my back or front :(

[–] platypus_plumba 25 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I can help you with that ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I have no idea what I meant, but it was dirty as hell.

[–] tjsauce 17 points 9 months ago

Nobody knows what it means, but it's PROVOCATIVE.

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I just keep rolling untill I fall asleep. Trying to sleep in a specific position is near impossible. Even the best one gets uncomfortable pretty quick. Only thing I try to avoid is sleeping on my right side as it seems to be the cause for my rhomboid pain

[–] CarbonatedPastaSauce 27 points 9 months ago (1 children)

What’s the furthest you’ve made it?

Don’t you worry about traffic?

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 9 months ago (5 children)

If I sleep on my stomach I can't move my neck the next day, right side my right hand goes painfully numb, left side my left hand goes painfully numb, back both hands go numb. There is literally no position I can sleep in that I don't wake up after a couple of hours and have to shift to a different position.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago (5 children)

You know the solution, you just have to sleep while spinning in place.

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[–] Resol 20 points 9 months ago (4 children)

Just don't sleep and you won't have that problem.

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[–] Noodle07 19 points 9 months ago (3 children)

I sleep best when I have a girl sleeping on me, I since bought a weighted blanket but it's not the same

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[–] TheEhHole 17 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Optimal sleeping position depends on where the dog is in the bed.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago

I sleep as if demons are attacking me. Every night I wake up with atleast 2 corners of my fitted sheet hugging me

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