this post was submitted on 11 Aug 2023
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Asklemmy

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[–] Lemmylefty 37 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Well, there’s the obvious will, but since it doesn’t specify how you die: an advanced directive.

An advanced directive is a document wherein you, while living and conscious and with control of your mental faculties, detail end of life care in the event that you are not capable of providing informed consent. You can detail how much and what kind of resuscitative or palliative efforts are made, assign someone you trust to make medical decisions for you, and what to do with your body.

DNRs (do not resuscitate, meaning no CPR done on you if your heart stops) are parts of advance directives and if you are serious about one make sure it gets into your medical chart: EMS personnel MUST provide CPR if it isn’t official.

If your family/friends situation is poor, contentious, and/or you can’t trust them to make the right choices for you medically, this can save you a painful death. Unfortunately, a lot of end of life “care” is the family’s attempt at prolonging the heartbeat of a nearly dead person because they can’t accept loss.

If your situation is good, it can still be a huge load off people’s minds to know that there’s a plan being followed, and it can prevent any rifts from forming. Even though you won’t see it, it’s a kindness to your loved ones to give them some peace of mind during what is often a chaotic and confusing time.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Since your response is matches my thoughts the best An independent executor so your friend or family member isn’t burdened with cleaning up after you while they are still hurt. Also leaves those you live out of the fighting.

Itemize your possessions. Maybe have your friends and family speak up and mention what they would want. Pointedly ask them. This avoids you leaving that green elephant to someone who didn’t want it when you want it to go somewhere it would be appreciated. Label things you want individual people to have. My aunt used dot stickers. Made it so simple.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

An independent executor so your friend or family member isn’t burdened with cleaning up after you while they are still hurt.

I don't know about that. It'll depend on your circumstances but it's asking a lot of a friend? My partner is getting everything and he is my executor because all the decisions should be his and because he knows where everything is. I don't really like the idea of someone else poking through my stuff, either. Or putting him through someone else poking through our stuff.

[–] xantoxis 30 points 1 year ago

A letter accusing your worst enemy of your murder, to be sent to the media in the event that you stop resetting your dead man's switch.

[–] zkfcfbzr 18 points 1 year ago

Instructions on how to contact any online acquaintances or communities that should be informed of your death

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (4 children)

A script that deletes all of your online information.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago

Would you even care if you're dead anyway? Maybe some far descendant can stumble across my posts and put them in his family history folder.

[–] over_clox 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Meh, I'd be more likely to make a script to upload all my remaining information. Not like I got any accounts anyone could use for any personal gain, I'm more of an internet historian archiving old software and stuff.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If it was never intended to be public, you might screw other living people over in the process. Think: revenge porn.

[–] over_clox 3 points 1 year ago

Yeah, but I just said, I archive software and stuff.

My pecker is too tiny for a bit of data. Or is it?... 🤔

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

... and then reddit undeletes it

[–] Usul_00_ 1 points 1 year ago

Are they doing that with everyone removing their content lately? So much for having control of your user account and persona.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

According to someone I met recently who shared way too much -- a will. Apparently her husband passed away unexpectedly and it has been a nightmare getting everything sorted.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

get your will in check too!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

weird how no one mentioned anything to do with your organs (i actuakly have no idea what to do with them either rofl what does one do)

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm donating mine. If any end up still usable.

[–] Tangent5280 0 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I don't plan to die with any of my organs in a usable state. I won the genetic lottery, I earned my organs fair and square. I earned it, I'm going to use every square inch of it.

EDIT: /s

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Depends on the organ. No one is going to want my lungs or liver, but depending on how and when I die I could see my eyes still being useful for example.

[–] StartledStarling 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

When my husband died unexpectedly, he had requested to be an organ donor (USA). The funeral home had me sign a consent form to allow his organs to be harvested. I didn't know which ones, but it was a time-urgent matter. I hope some of his organs went to people who needed them. He was a healthy 30-year-old man.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

sorry for your loss thats terrible. also, sorry to say this but are you sure it was a legitimate operation? organ donation is tje US is highly unregulated and many donated bodies domt get used for intended purposes. if you want to know more about that look into 'stephen douglas gore'.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

a towel. every hitchhiker should carry a towel with them.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] over_clox 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And a condom. Don't forget the condom. They double as water transportation bags.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] over_clox 3 points 1 year ago

Filled with Ramen right? Right?..

[–] TheDarkKnight 8 points 1 year ago

You line of succession, lest you leave the kingdom vulnerable to imposters and agents of chaos.

[–] Nioxic 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Personally i dont care, really.

When i die im dead, so i will stop giving fucks.

I dont care what happens to my body

I dont care what happens to my stuff

Just make sure im dead

[–] ctobrien84 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If you have dependants, then they certainly care if your affairs are in order, or not. Dealing with the aftermath of a death is not trivial when it comes to number of hoops to jump through.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Not even just dependents but even friends and other family. I recently saw someone go through being an executor of a friend's will, and that will was relatively in order, and it still took over a year to wind everything up.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Preparing for death is more about relieving the anxieties of your life. Preparing for death can help to lessen anxiety about dying.

[–] Okokimup 6 points 1 year ago

If you're one of the plebes still on facebook, you should designate someone to inherit your account. There's a setting for it. Otherwise, if someone memorializes your page, they won't be able to make any changes, like update photos.

[–] Tylerdurdon 5 points 1 year ago

Clean underwear

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Make sure you add a statement of wishes to your will, especially look into your digital legacy. My will was straightforward but my statement of wishes was lengthy and the poor lawyer had never had to deal with anything like it before so had to consult a senior partner. In the end they just copy and pasted it over - money for old rope.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

can you elaborate on what your wishes were and why

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's quite lengthy.

It covers my digital legacy so gives the password to my password manager and a list of key accounts that need shuttering, especially my Wikipedia admin account.

Then various classes of items to different places - academic books to the university library, others to specialist collections, general fiction off to one person, comics to another and on.

If it's something you are interested in, you should read around on the subject as various guides give you examples that may be closer to your circumstances.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

can you dm me your will id like to use it for reference you seem to very knowledgable

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I've rather not as there's a tonne of personal information in there and little that would necessarily be relevant to you.

My best advice to anyone is search for "statement of wishes" and then "digital legacy" and that will get you the guides I used. I can't claim to have any greater knowledge and experience than they provided, just enough to befuddle a junior lawyer.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Have a method for your loved ones to access all of your important passwords. If you have a password manager, having a shared vault with a trusted partner or family member is important.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Lots of them have an emergency access feature, definitely worth looking into if you haven't

[–] cow 1 points 1 year ago

rm -rf / —no-preserve-root

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] FollyDolly 3 points 1 year ago

Gotta put down a bed before you go.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago

An up to date offsite backup so you can just restore to the last state with minimal loss