Like all the zombies on Lemmy... Slap them harder until they wake up and stop being zombies?
this post was submitted on 07 Feb 2025
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- I dont tell anyone
- I buy S&P 500 mutual funds
- I choose zombie type: paralyzed
Time to go over my credit card limit buying shit for my home, mainly food and water. I wonder how long would electricity keep running.
At least I can pick zombie type, so only slow walkers like in the original Resident Evi or in Project Zomboid.
Living on an upper floor comes in handy for once, as it's actually fairly easy to barricade the front door. Alert some key close friends and family members who will actually believe me. Then stock up on canned goods, fill every possible thing I can with water, and grab some camping solar kits for power once the grid goes down.
After that? Hunker down. Avoid being clearly seen in windows or heard to prevent attracting the undead. I reckon I need to last about 6-9 weeks.
See, the thing is, zombies are going to die out. The average human can go 3 days without water and 3 weeks without food. Let's assume zombies have a magical lack of need of hydration, so they last 3 weeks. Double that for the time they'll have ample food. Assume another 3 weeks that they'll cannibalize each other or something.
At that point, I can begin to venture outside. Small numbers of capable zombies may still exist, but most will be dead or starving. Other survivors are my greatest worry.
other survivors
Have you seen/read the walking dead? Other survivors the concern.
Other survivors are my greatest worry.
You should have kept reading 😆
Dude your mom’s my biggest concern
Head on over to the Winchester and wait for this all to blow over.
Total cost: couple of quid for a pint
Get gun, fishing rod and tackle, salt water filters, and those mre buckets bible thumpers are always selling on tv. Go to the marina and steal a keelboat. Dab on all the land lubbers still on shore.
Can I go with you?
Sure. I can always use more fishbait.
What the hell, i'd probably be more useful doing that than just pathetically dieing by stubbing my toe running and getting teatanus or somethign.
☠️
My plan would be "go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over"
Sounds like a slice of fried gold
Hey, that's the same plan I have for my next date.
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Hole up in Costco for two weeks or so.
The rotting corpses who only hunger for flesh are going to be eaten by animals and bugs. Because they don’t have regular ways to maintain water balance for muscles they will atrophy and become immobile. They will pretty much be a non threat while I have plenty of food and shelter to last me.
I remember Neil DeGrasse Tyson explaining away zombies. Really took the immersion out of any zombie movies. Basically what you said, but more of it.
The power grid is usually one of the first things to go during a zombie apocalypse. Only the shelf stable food will be usable after a few days. That being said, there's plenty of space in the warehouse to hole up.
Buy a lot of toothpaste and toothbrushes.
And I would ask those hordes of zombie to brush their teeth before they try to bite me as I would not want to get sick and maybe contagious right before I'm eaten alive.
Book a long, long transatlantic or transpacific cruise that is leaving today or tomorrow morning. Bring as much as I can carry and a life straw and bunch of filters.
Supplies and boat on a large body of water.
Wait for real life to kill zombies. Or for them to rebuild society.
Get some plants to fight them
Make sure to stock up on fungi for the nighttime, too.
Drugs.
Then suicide.
#1: Cardio
That'll do pig. That'll do.
Can i get cardio in two days? This changes everything.
Lol. I'm screwed. My asthma makes any sort of cardio impossible after 5 minutes.
Yeah I recommend rolling the Too Swole To Control perk. Sounds like you refuse to do cardio. /s obvs
Probably procrastinate for 48hrs.
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