this post was submitted on 13 Nov 2024
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[–] [email protected] 181 points 1 month ago (5 children)

I get the metaphor this is making, but I can't help but view this as everyone being passive aggressive because the character refuses to actually see a doctor about their hand lol.

[–] [email protected] 119 points 1 month ago (8 children)

Finding a doctor, making an appointment, keeping that appointment, trying who knows how many medications until you find one that helps, etc. is not the easiest thing in the world when you have trouble just getting out of bed in the morning.

[–] solomon42069 70 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What about affording any of that? OR a home... or getting time off work for the 100th time this year.

Life is often unkind to those who need a bit of kindness the most.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago

Yea, I was just thinking this morning how fucked up it is that there's nothing you can do if you're in this situation to catch up. The world won't stop moving while you try to figure your shit out and you're just fucked if you fall behind while trying to deal with it.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago

Should be a broken foot and everyone tells him to just walk to the doctor

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

this, big time. The amount of times where I had migraine with the vision impairment on the day of an appointment, unable to drive and farther away than I could safely get to on my own by any means if I could manage to fumble through any to begin with, and nobody able to bring me.

then just remembering which meds go to my elderly birds, elderly grandparents, and which go to me

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Like I said, I fully get the metaphor and the point being made. It's just a funny interpretation.

[–] Num10ck 7 points 1 month ago (3 children)

self medicate! mushrooms and puppies!

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[–] quixotic120 7 points 1 month ago (9 children)

But you still have to take steps to do it or your hand will never get better. Granted it’s easier if people give you support but depending on where you are at in life that can’t necessarily be something you can count on. So you have to break it down into a manageable step and attack it at that point. If you’re having trouble getting out bed, focus on just getting out of bed. Or don’t, just call a doctor from bed and do telemedicine there if possible. Whatever works.

It sounds callous to someone that’s deep in it but the reality of the situation is that excuses won’t alleviate your situation. You have to find what you can do, if you can’t do something then it is what it is but you also have to accept that the world does not exist without consequence and you will probably have to accept the consequences of that action (people being frustrated with you for flaking, trouble at work, etc). Pursue accommodations when possible to alleviate the burden but also recognize that depression is a mix of neurochemical and behavioral components. You have a degree of control over severity of the behavioral part and it is about the choices you make with what how you spend your time

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The point is you shouldn't be telling the depressed person how to deal with their illness.

The author of this comic is trying to say that the problem is not the depressed person, the problem is everyone else telling him how to treat his illness.

You've got some good advice but you seem to fundamentally misunderstand the point this artist is trying to make.

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[–] Aeri 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Visually misread the middle panel guy as a doctor and not some douche in a white jacket at first which almost felt like a different type of joke.

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[–] [email protected] 101 points 1 month ago (7 children)

It took almost 2 fucking years after my first initial appointment to get properly medicated.

I'd literally kill myself if I was forced to do it all again.

You "just go see a doctor"–folk have no idea how fucking difficult it is to 1). actually be seen by a competent doctor, 2). be taken seriously, 3). and actually receive treatment for mental health stuff.

That's not even including the whole "getting out of a shit enough headspace to actually do all that stuff in the first place."

Unmedicated me felt like wading through hell.

Be kind to those with different chemistry. Shit sucks.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I want medication for my ADHD and instead the doctors I would see kept trying different antidepressants. None of them helped. In fact most just added more problems, like not being able to get an erection, weight gain, and fatigue. I would tell them and they would either switch to a different antidepressant or up the dosage.

I know the cause of my depression and I want to treat that; not the fucking symptoms of depression itself. But I also have shitty insurance that's only accepted by 2 different networks of health care where I am, and they are so understaffed for the mental health shit that making an appointment anywhere is always 6 to 8 months away, and even if you show up the doctor might not.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

And that's not even taking into account the miseries of:

1: Fighting with insurance to let you have what you desperately need at a price that wouldn't bankrupt you.

2: Fighting with your pharmacy over prescription issues.

3: Dealing with sudden nationwide shortages.

Fuck...

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Even once I had a great doctor who knew what I had, it still took nearly two years to find a medication that worked for me with side-effects that I could tolerate. It's a long frustrating journey.

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[–] PunnyName 75 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

And ADHD just means "you're too lazy, and just need to focus."

Things that make me want to hurt people.

[–] spankmonkey 29 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It really sucks being a parent with ADHD having a kid with ADHD understanding the struggles while also having to say "You need to figure out what will work for you to focus on this stuff. Also, just try some of these suggestions to see if they work instead of refusing to try at all."

Like I understand the struggle and still end up sounding like that just because figuring out something to improve the situation is necessary although it isn't quite the same thing as 'try harder'. Just keep trying until you figure out something that improves the situation.

[–] PunnyName 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

For me, it's all about someone trying to help me, together.

I'm lucky that a few of my coworkers understand the feeling that working on a thing together (even if it's separate tasks) can achieve the larger goal. It's much better than going alone, or with someone who tries to play director/boss.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)

ADHD sucks. It's a pain in the ass to get my meds, the meds help, but I still have good days and bad days. I don't think it's nearly as debilitating as a crushed hand, I don't even put it on the same level as depression. That said everyone has a different toolbox for their issues, and some people are better equipped than others.

[–] PunnyName 6 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I've got a lovely cocktail of ADHD, C-PTSD, Depression, and Anxiety. And people are upset when it takes me an hour to get out of bed.

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[–] [email protected] 47 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Oh hey, I have something for this.

From experience, 'making it somebody else's problem' by asking for help, rarely ends well or gets you the help you need. It just makes you an annoyance and look bad, and eventually people (healthcare workers included) decide you're malingering and/or attention seeking and start treating you even worse.

Isn't life fun.

[–] samus12345 11 points 1 month ago (11 children)

I wish so many comments on this post didn't support what you're saying. And the guy in the comic isn't even asking for help, just showing that he's suffering.

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[–] hardcoreufo 6 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Long story about healthcare workers.

I went to the ER for chest pains this summer. EKG was good, did a scan, and didn't see any blockages. They determined it was probably heart burn.

I started taking prevacid and that helped but I still wasn't feeling great. Doc said to try the three main over the counter heart burn drugs to see what worked. So I tried nexium next.

By the time I finished that bottle I was feeling very nauseous, dizzy and would get sharp quick headaches that lasted a few seconds. On top of that still feeling pain in my left shoulder/ chest area. It got to the point that one day at work I just felt so bad I had to go back to the ER.

Another round of scans and tests and they still said the old ticker looked good but did give me an IV and anti nausea that helped. The ER doc this time asked if I had anxiety and I said sure because at that moment I was very worried about my health.

They discharged me and I went home for the day and set up some doctors appointments. I went to my doc and talked about everything going on and she looked at the test results. Then she says the ER doc says you have anxiety and gives me a bunch of pamphlets about mental health and suggests talk therapy.

I've got nothing against therapy and could probably use some, but I don't think it's the cause of my chest problems. I was perfectly fine before the first ER visit. Anyways I fired her and went looking for a new doctor.

I found one and set up a physical. We did all the basics and he went over all my tests results. I felt like I was being listened to and we were getting somewhere.

His big suggestion was to lose weight... Again not a bad idea but maybe not the core of the problem. He thought that or nerve pain.

Well losing weight seems more appropriate than talk therapy so I set out doing that for a few months. I'm down about 15 lbs, got another 30 to go. Hasn't really helped, but I am looking better.

In the mean time I'm still taking prevacid because that helped and I didn't have any side effects. Except one time I bought a bottle of Prilosec instead by accident. I got about halfway through and started feeling dizzy, and nauseous again, so I cut that out and went back to prevacid.

I looked it up and turns out Prilosec and Nexium are closely related and do have those side effects. Nexium just was worse for me. Prevacid is a completely unrelated drug and does not cause me issues. So second ER was probably all from the Nexium and no one caught that despite me informing them of what meds I was taking.

We also scheduled a colonoscopy and endoscopy to look for a root cause of heart burn issues but found none. The new doc who told me to lose weight said let's try a nerve blocker so I said okay. Turns out it's also an anti anxiety med as well... so I think that suggestion was based off ER doc saying I'm anxious.

I decided to take it anyway even though I don't think I need anti anxiety meds. It's been two weeks and shoulder pain is pretty much gone which is great but I'm having way too many side effects from this drug. Wake up in sweats, always thirsty, low libido etc.

I go back next week to talk to doc about it see if there's something else to try since this path seems to be working.

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[–] Whats_your_reasoning 40 points 1 month ago

Goddamn, way to make me flashback.

There was a point in my life where I was facing homelessness, was constantly job searching but hearing nothing back, and had to count coins to make sure I could afford to eat each day. Not only that, but the closest family member, who had invited me to stay with them if things went tits up, had just died two days before in a sudden and tragic way.

And my then-bf dragged me to a bar, where he and all his friends told me to “just let it go” and “loosen up” as if the basement rock of my world hadn’t just eroded out from under me. I sure as shit couldn’t afford bar prices, and not a single one of the group offered to get me anything, leaving me stone sober while they all got shitfaced. I ended up crying alone in the bathroom for an hour, and when I came back out, “bf” was getting a fucking lap dance from his friend’s fiancee.

That wasn’t even the worst part of the night. It definitely got darker before the light returned.

I’m okay now, over a decade later, in an infinitely-better place with supportive friends and partners. But man, what a journey.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago

This comic hits the nail on the head for me. When speaking with doctors and therapists, I would describe the depression as non-physical mental pain. Like I don’t feel sad and I don’t feel like I am a bad person, but it’s like my mind hurts and I still feel like shit.

[–] Kyrgizion 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Feel this one in my bones.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Well at least you have bones amiright?

[–] Kyrgizion 24 points 1 month ago (2 children)

My only regret is that I have... boneitis.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Fucking bones. Inside my body. Everywhere. And my brain is trapped inside one of them. Fuck. 😖

[–] solomon42069 16 points 1 month ago

The worst part is when people call somebody lazy or make other assumptions about them cause of their lack of wealth or expensive things or tidy hair. Some people never grow out of that schoolyard shit.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (26 children)

"I can't, because of my hand. My hand hurts so much. Life sucks because of this hand."

"You should go to a doctor to show your hand"

"No! It won't help anything! And it costs money. And I don't know how to or want to anyway."

I've seen that too, where the person doesn't want to actually even try to help themselves.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (7 children)

Which of course is a symptom.

“My leg is broken” “Then walk to the hospital, duh” “I can’t, my leg is broken” “Why are you choosing to live in pain?!”

[–] uid0gid0 7 points 1 month ago

Then you carry them to the hospital and they don't want to get treatment but they sure as hell want you to keep carrying them around. Been in that situation and it really sucks.

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[–] BradleyUffner 13 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Dude should maybe consider seeing a doctor about his "hand".

[–] samus12345 21 points 1 month ago (23 children)

This is about others not taking depression seriously. The difficulty in getting treatment is another matter.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

Have you tried not being injured?

[–] ZeffSyde 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I think must of us are missing the fact that the second to last panel his 'smile' is a grimace because he has severed the afflicted hand.

I'll let you discuss what is meant by this.

[–] samus12345 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I actually never interpreted it that way - I though it was just showing it getting worse - but that's a good point and you may be right. It could be showing that he "fixed" the problem by pretending it doesn't exist as much as he can around others, since none of them take it seriously anyway. Of course, that won't help anything and will likely make it worse.

[–] Psythik 10 points 1 month ago

I have ADHD and my SO desperately needs to see this.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

What if we stage an intervention and have one of your childhood friends beat you while screaming about how your every single action is a sign you're trying to kill yourself? -reasons why there's a whole half of my family I don't talk to anymore.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

Ah, an artist who graduated from the Bruce Timm and John K school of horny Archie fanart.

(I actually love it)

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

With friends like these, you don't need enemies

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