Asklemmy

Feeling monke, might delete later

An animal, biped, featherless

I look like a greek god with a body rippling with muscles and a shock of flaming red hair. Not that you asked but im also incredibly honest and always tell the truth. Unlike this other guy I don't guard a door with.

Pretty poorly, which is why I wear glasses.

I'm just a 12-inch 60 watt guitar loudspeaker with tailored mid-range frequency response primarily used to record metal trying to find other guitar loudspeakers with tailored mid-range frequency responses primarily used to record metal

Nice try glowies

As a color, that entirely depends on what my wavelength is. I personally vibe with the wavelengths of 490 to 500 nanometers. But I'm also quite fond of rocking 600 to 620 nanometers on some days!

Caution: Retinal damage can occur at or above 4,000 lux. Judge my brightness at your own risk!

I'm sorry I legally not allowed to show or describe my looks online as it's considered a high war crime.

Vaguely human-like

Like a child cosplaying as an adult

Aging hipster.

an actual goblin. like, with the rusty scimitar, three copper coins, and leather armor. The full ensemble.

Like Grimace.

A human balloon animal.

I look like a gullible fool who would describe himself in full detail on the internet. Hi! I’m Troy McClure. You might know me from threads such as “Facebook is for losers, LinkdIn is for winners”, or “Data Privacy: What’s mine is yours!” and “Rich Mom, Poor Mom: The Story of Where My Money Is”

Ugly.

Not telling my mother's maiden name or first pet, but I feel like I should weigh in with all the non-serious responses.

Bald, beardy, tall and white. Reasonably attractive and fit, so not total neckbeard material. I dress kind of business casual.

As of now, you can consider it covered. Alternatively, if you know how Pitcairn officially looks in Hetalia, you pretty much have the answer.