this post was submitted on 28 Apr 2024
498 points (92.3% liked)

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[–] Maultasche 121 points 7 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 101 points 7 months ago (15 children)

If a cute goblin woman wanted to claim me as her husband, I probably wouldn't say no.

[–] [email protected] 125 points 7 months ago (12 children)

I mean, cute in a 2D depiction, with a lot of detail missing, but think of the reality of the situation.

Probably smells like shit, literally. Bathes as frequently as she hunts fish.

Probably has no idea what a toothbrush is, chunks of meat stuck between teeth until the enzymes in her saliva break it down over weeks.

Anatomically incompatible, probably.

[–] [email protected] 94 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (11 children)

Bro, the genre's called fantasy for a reason.

Why you gotta ruin my dream of finding someone who loves me for myself? Unrealistic though it might be...

[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago (2 children)

She doesn't love you, you're the first thing she could grab with a heart beat and two legs

[–] [email protected] 25 points 7 months ago

Beggars can't be choosers.

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[–] Zehzin 70 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] p5yk0t1km1r4ge 33 points 7 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 13 points 7 months ago (9 children)

you're aware humans have existed in the wild for millions of years and we regularly fucked other human species, ye? and people can be in relationships without having sex.

Goblins that are capable of intelligent speech and understanding and desiring the concept of a husband are well within the limits of acceptability.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 7 months ago (6 children)

I mean, the many half races in DnD implies that most races arent anatomically incompatible

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[–] Duamerthrax 9 points 7 months ago

Fiction can be whatever you want it to be. There's no Right way to depict fantasy races/creatures.

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago

If a ~~cute goblin~~ woman wanted to claim me as her husband, I probably wouldn't say no.

FTFY

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[–] Clbull 82 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 31 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)
[–] Aielman15 51 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (3 children)

There are two types of dnd players.

Those who want to live the fantasy of being able to afford rent.

And those who want to fuck monsters.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 7 months ago

Why are people always so dualistic in their categorizations?! What if I want to be able to afford rent and fuck monsters?!

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[–] ekZepp 35 points 7 months ago
[–] Iron_Lynx 33 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Cyanide! Don't stick your dick in crazy!

[–] [email protected] 30 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I see your point, but what if she's really hot?

[–] Iron_Lynx 15 points 7 months ago (1 children)

But don't stick your dick in crazy!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] Iron_Lynx 19 points 7 months ago

He's hopeless, he's lost.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (1 children)

How did I just stumble upon a wild Soviet Womble reference? Bwahaha

[–] Iron_Lynx 9 points 7 months ago

I saw an opportunity and I took it!

[–] [email protected] 27 points 7 months ago

I am so sick of these unrealistic body standards.

[–] darthsid 26 points 7 months ago

What the fuck?

[–] [email protected] 19 points 7 months ago

What the fuck? Oh hell yes!

[–] feedum_sneedson 10 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago

Wasn't there a Goblin Waifu game that was alright?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago (1 children)
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