this post was submitted on 19 Feb 2024
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[–] flicker 54 points 9 months ago (6 children)

My Mom was garbage. Anybody know where I can get a decent one?

Also I'm almost 40 but if she's good enough I'll take one younger than I am.

[–] 3ntranced 69 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I'm a 24 year old man but I'll be your mother.

[–] flicker 41 points 9 months ago

I'm going to send you a Mother's Day card.

[–] frickineh 22 points 9 months ago (1 children)

My mom's good, and you're the same age as me, so that works out ok. Plus, she's already basically adopted my two best friends and a much younger coworker who was really going through some shit and needed a safe place, so I know she's cool with extra kids.

[–] flicker 19 points 9 months ago

Awesome. I'll just show up at the next holiday or whatever and pretend I was always there.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

I moved to a state I knew no one in for college (more than a decade ago) and now I have new parents. It's that easy.

[–] AnalogyAddict 7 points 9 months ago

I'll be a mom for anyone, so long as you understand that I won't bail you out of jail, though I will visit you there, and coming over and pouring out your woes over milk and home-baked goods is mandatory when you're having a hard day.

[–] brianorca 5 points 9 months ago

You marry someone with a good mom. Now your MIL is your good mom.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You can have as many parents as you want

Just gonna go to the mall and collect a few moms for myself...

[–] [email protected] 22 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago

That's horrible. Which mall would you get them at? Which one?

[–] [email protected] 38 points 9 months ago (2 children)

honestly never occurred to me you could go through life collecting parents

[–] ThePantser 28 points 9 months ago

Gotta catch em all, Pokemoms!

[–] Viking_Hippie 4 points 9 months ago

I have one parent who's happily married to my step mom and one who's shown no interest in romantic companionship since the divorce, both of them 70+, otherwise I'd TOTALLY do that questline 😄

[–] [email protected] 34 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I've got none - they shouldn't really be hogging them.

[–] alphacyberranger 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Yeah, bet they flip them for a nice profit when they get up into double figures.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago
[–] Stupidmanager 31 points 9 months ago

My ex and I were known to the local high school teachers (through our own kids) and someone told us they loved hearing us cheer for single parent or working parents kids on the teams. We Never did this for recognition, my ex did this because her parents were never there for her. My ex… was loud, So you heard her screaming “go Johnny!!!!!” From the sideline at all parts of the field. We were sideline parents to any kids who needed it.

We are recently divorced and our kids are well into adulthood, but I still get an occasional text “hey, game on Friday at 2, mind cheering for #14 Sara?” And go figure, my ex is there too, cheering her on. And more recently, my oldest started to join because “you guys made a difference to several friends that needed that boost”. So, tradition?

You can have more than one parent, even if it’s only for 90 minutes a week.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Turbo divorce, it's like turbo tax. It happens every year and only takes about a day to do.

[–] Viking_Hippie 22 points 9 months ago

And the government could do it for you, but powerful lobby groups are keeping that from happening to preserve profits.

[–] PanoptiDon 11 points 9 months ago

Paternal mitosis