this post was submitted on 16 Nov 2023
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“That’s how you end up with a 4th quarter profit of $529 million, available to common shareholders,” Weston Jr. emphasized. “People don’t like dying.”

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[–] _number8_ 73 points 1 year ago (2 children)

for anyone just randomly seeing this on lemmy, the beaverton does indeed do satire

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago

the sad part is: my first reaction to this was "huh, guess we're really gone that far..."

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago (2 children)

How does Loblaws how more control over the country that our own PM

[–] cheese_greater 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Im not persuaded they don't moonlight and play twins now and again for shiggles

[–] girlfreddy 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Shiggles is my new favourite word.

[–] cheese_greater 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] girlfreddy 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

T'absurd is often the best path t'knowledge.

[–] cheese_greater 2 points 1 year ago

T'absurd t'yonder

[–] ikidd 2 points 1 year ago

But he talked to them! That was going to fix everything, I heard.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago (3 children)

They balance it between ... raise prices high enough to make profit ... keep it low enough to not cause the pee-ons to riot.

The problem is not completely their fault ... part of the problem is that we are all just willing to keep bending over to allow them screw us as much as they want.

I'm not saying we should start a revolution ... but we should be out in the streets or calling our political reps and basically just causing enough of a protest to affect our country's leadership and corporate heads to do something about all this.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Not sure if it's just me, but I feel like companies have had it so good for so long that they're starting to push the limits just to see at what point society breaks down.

Especially during/after the pandemic, some of the things corporations have been doing just seem so incredibly brazen in their greed. From Loblaws et al, to the various social media companies, it's like the mask is off at this point.

Not to say these corporations weren't squeezing us before, just that it feels like they used to try harder to hide it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Especially during/after the pandemic

That was the perfect time to do a test run, prices could be raised and the blame put on 'supply chain.' Now they know that there are minimal social/economic repercussions to gouging, businesses can fine tune prices to the absolute limit of human tolerance.

The same with wages, the majority of people are on such shakey ground that they will accept terrible wages because the alternative is homelessness.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

That's right, it's our fault! We should all go on a grocery strike and stop eating! That'll show 'em!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Why though? This will only end up with cops beating people up and the government getting more money from the quasi monopolies in Canada anyway in exchange for putting their people in charge of consumer protection agencies like the CRTC and shit.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

The goal of capitalism is to own all the wealth. Anything less is failure in the eyes of the bean-counters. Canada's monopolies will fight tooth and nail to make sure that you own nothing and that you pay them for the privilege.

[–] BonesOfTheMoon 16 points 1 year ago

This is satire but is also why nobody should feel bad about stealing food. Screw Loblaws.

[–] sneezymrmilo 10 points 1 year ago

Jeezy you know the world is fucked when I couldn't tell if this was satire or not at first glance.

[–] moistclump 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

“People don’t like dying.” Holy shit, if ever a phrase that shows we’re getting fucked cause we need groceries.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] SleepyBear 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The Beaverton is a Canadian satire news site.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's it really though? Or are they just stating the obvious?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Isn't a sign of good satire that it seems like it's telling the truth?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

This one seems more on the nose than usual.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

That's like an answer to an interview question.

"So, why are you wanting to work here?"
"Well, I like being able to live, for one,"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

People don't like dying?!?! That totally explains why all my enterprises so far have flopped!! 🤦