this post was submitted on 26 Sep 2023
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[–] [email protected] 30 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Just open your mouth and throat wide, and pour the coffee in so it never touches your teeth.

Or take it the same way I do: Rectally.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

I get my rectal absorbtion when the coffee is making its way out...usually only about 15 minutes after the oral imbibation.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago (1 children)

What's wrong with stained teeth? That's just tooth colour. Teeth shouldn't be white - it looks weird!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago

Kinda true, completely white teeth is not natural.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago (2 children)

i feel like so many people the world over need to just fucking buy caffeine pills: cheaper per unit of caffeine, doesn't taste like shit (so many people don't make good coffee anyways), and way more convenient.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

"might" implies it's a lot more likely to happen than it is, it takes like 10 pills of 100mg each to get the classic caffeine dependency with headaches and stuff, and to reach genuinely serious effects you would have to chug the entire bottle (assuming it's a 50-pill bottle).

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

A fellow Student of mine had some symptoms from drinking high coffein black tea and then using some coffein tablet. (Everything Was well afterward, but high jitteryness, Lack of focus and high heat rate aren't good)

[–] idunnololz 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Bruh. I love the flavor of coffee.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

that's not what i'm talking about, i'm talking about how people make the shittiest coffee imaginable and oftentimes merrily let it burn.

I don't mind coffee flavoured chocolate, but most of the coffee that people drink is so furiously bitter that i can only barely taste the coffee flavour.

[–] idunnololz 1 points 11 months ago

Oof. Honestly drip coffee is fine and super easy to make. I personally like cold brew and you pretty much can't fuck that up.

[–] Dasnap 11 points 11 months ago

Something something same with cum.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

If you dump your shit in one rending, cacophonous blast of poopa then you can avoid staining your starfish

[–] 1847953620 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

I knew there would be a bidet comment. I knew

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago

Abandon coffee, embrace tea 🙇🙇

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

I make my own iced coffee so I can chug it quickly.

[–] affiliate 4 points 11 months ago (2 children)

u can also drink through straw

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

Yes officer’s, this post right there.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Tried it, doesn't work, teeth still get stained and I just but the shit out of my mouth.

[–] affiliate 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

maybe you need a longer straw

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Or shorter teeth

[–] erranto 2 points 11 months ago

Was this taken from the start of a gay porn video. cause the tension is real

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I listened to my dentist's advice to stop adding milk and sugar in my coffee. I now appreciate the taste of coffee much more, felt like reducing added sugar overall, and best of all I can be a coffee snob now. Win-win.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Oh I thought the milk made it healthier. Although I do prefer it without

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Milk isn't any healthier than any other drink. It's calcium content was considered it's primary benefit until a long term study was done that found we don't actually absorb calcium from milk that efficiently (like, 30-ish%). Calcium absorption in plants is much better, which makes sense since humans have been eating beans, nuts, and leafy greens far longer than dairy milk. We're built better for that. I'm sure populations have adapted more, somewhat, but there are still many places where the lactose intolerance is the norm and they're not all collapsing from brittle bones. The fat in milk is probably the healthiest part. You'd have to check the particular plant, but it even seems like plant-based milks might be better for all the health benefits than dairy. In general, low to moderate coffee consumption provides more health benefits than milk. You mostly just have to worry about caffeine levels.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

I meant "healthier" like it somehow makes the coffee less acidic? It feels like that's what it's doing. Anyway, I hadn't really thought of it, but I meant oat milk above. I haven't had cow milk in years now. I kind of assumed everyone was going that way, but I have no evidence to back that up

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Lactose is a sugar and can cause cavities. What is overall healthier is debatable. Milk, I suppose, would lower the acidity.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Maybe stop drinking coffee?

[–] Sylvartas 6 points 11 months ago