this post was submitted on 23 Sep 2023
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[–] geekworking 43 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's the measurement that you use when you need to account for shrinkage.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The house only has like 1/3 of its square footage during the winter months.

[–] IonAddis 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What happens to houses with pools?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

It gets complicated. That's why pools are so expensive.

[–] Alexstarfire 30 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Finding the reference dick is the real problem.

[–] creditCrazy 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Eh it was probably the same king with a abnormally large foot but who knows maybe his feet are compensating for something

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

You know what they say about guys with large feet...

.

.

.

.

They must be compensating for something.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Banana for scale?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Try not to suck any dick on your way through the parking lot.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

And she still wasn't done...

[–] DustyNipples 2 points 1 year ago

Came here for the Clerk's reference

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Well...a foot is a measurement so it makes sense to use other body parts, right?

Length is two feet, three dicks and a pussy. Anyone could measure that way and it would be a world standard.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Old Slavic customary measurements had "foot", but also "palm" and "elbow" (roughly forearm length), as well as some less obvious body part based measurements

[–] Neon 3 points 1 year ago

https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elle_(Einheit)

The Elle / Yard / Forearm is one of the oldest and most common ways of measurement

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

It always irks me when people think using foot as measurement was invented in England when they were used all over the world since the beginning of time. And different countries had different sized standard feet

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What measurement did they use for one? The average or "the average"?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

They measured from the stump

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Make sure to get to the roots!

[–] totallynotarobot 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Problem is if a man drafted something dimensioned in dicks then handed it off to a woman to build it, you'd end up with a Spinal Tap Stonehenge situation.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

Why are the women not using their OSHA approved strap-ons to measure?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Awful system, they're always giving me much less than I expect.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Hey, it was just cold in the warehouse.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

If the foot measurement is supposedly based on King Henry I, who's dick is this? 👀

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

More like 121 amirite?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I just replace miles with dicks because mines the same size

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That sounds... Inconvenient.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Not really, I always have a measuring stick on me!

[–] ItsABarmcake 5 points 1 year ago

A measuring dick*

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

My condolences for your too long schlong.

[–] FrostbyteIX 8 points 1 year ago

So I'm guessing its 240000 dicks to build a house?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Is this a personalised measurement? Like do you have to slap your dick on the table and then go "300 dicks of wood please"

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

You have to if you don't want to get shortchanged.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I had this shower thought lately, that imperial measurements is how the USA still is partly colonized by the British empire. It's in the name.

The British themselves are slowly phasing it out, but the Americans still sick to their guns.

[–] AngryCommieKender 3 points 1 year ago

We were going to switch to metric, but our 1kg weight got stolen by pirates.

[–] Sludgeyy 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

USA uses US customary units

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

the Americans still stick to their guns.

As we like to do, partner.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I read that in the voice of the engineer in tf2

[–] lemmylommy 5 points 1 year ago

It was the style at the time

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If you're measuring something in dicks and you're in Europe, multiply by 0.75 to convert

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[–] PP_BOY_ 4 points 1 year ago (3 children)

If you want to really make a European's head explode, ask them how big a 2x4 is

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Is it not 2"X4"? Am I naïve?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It's not. It's 1.5" x 3.5". I don't know the history and wasn't able to find it in a quick search, but lumber sizes are usually a half inch less than the name would imply.

That only applies to the thickness and width, though. The length of a board should be as described (e.g. a "two by four by eight" would be eight feet long, but have a cross section of 1.5 by 3.5 inches)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It's funny that you used 2x4-8 as your example for length, because a 2x4-8 stud is not actually 8 foot. If you're looking for 8 foot 2x4, you need to be careful that you are buying true 8 foot boards, and not 8 foot studs.

That being said, that's the only board I'm familiar with that has a length that's not always true length

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Oh, that is funny. Are the studs 7'9" so a board below and above them are 8' total?

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[–] Ddhuud 1 points 1 year ago

The story is that the wood used to be roughly 2x4 and by "roughly" I mean that the woodworker would have to throw away almost half an inch to even have a straight surface.

But when the machines to do that became common the mills started doing that work, and they saved the extra volume of essentially garbage that was shipped with every piece of wood.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

It is when it's first cut. But then it gets dried and planed down.

https://yewtu.be/watch?v=WaJFudED5FQ

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[–] totallynotarobot 3 points 1 year ago

Nominal sizing is not uniquely American any more (if it ever was? Idk honestly). Work with lots of Europeans who are used to it as much as we are.

[–] BilboBargains 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

As a legal requirement we don't specify materials in anything other than mm, cm and m. In the UK the imperial measurements are sometimes also shown in a store, to help old people know what they are buying, but I've never seen that anywhere in continental Europe. Architecture isn't drawn using imperial measurements, this system is used ad hoc by UK builders only. I like to torment these luddites by specifying in mm but mostly I avoid interacting with them because I don't want to have a Mars Climate Orbiter situation at my house.

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