this post was submitted on 22 Jun 2023
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We are truly living in an Idiocracy. What kind of headline is this?

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[–] YourBrainOnScience 57 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I can't believe this is a real story.

Why can't they be like normal billionaires and just go outside and play with their submersibles?

[–] aparadizzle 10 points 2 years ago

I'd rather see them have a duel at dawn, or whenever.

[–] muaveri 34 points 2 years ago (3 children)

So zuccyboy called musk and said, hey elon my metatrap is not getting any free publicity lately & your blue bird looks kinda dead, do you have any ideas? Sure, let's stage some fake mma bs so that everybody can talk about, Joe will do some small talk for the populi about our everyday struggles, shinning different light on our cumbersome lives and we profit again. Great idea loonyboy, I'm in.

[–] Yoz 5 points 2 years ago

Lol exactly this

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[–] maggoats 25 points 2 years ago (2 children)

I had to look this up because I thought it was fake.

What the fuck is wrong with these people?

[–] ShadyGrove 7 points 2 years ago

I really thought this was an onion article. I'm still not convinced it isn't yet.

[–] Dark_Blade 23 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I swear, the world's turned into a parody of itself without any of us realizing it. Where's the fucking cameras?

[–] cley_faye 15 points 2 years ago

We realize. There's just no way to stop this right now.

[–] dethb0y 23 points 2 years ago

We do, in fact, live in the dumbest possible timeline.

[–] stanleytweedle 22 points 2 years ago

Could we just leave them in the cage?

[–] MyOpinion 20 points 2 years ago (5 children)

The Zuck has a lot of training. Musk is a fat roll. Not a good matchup.

[–] Buffaloaf 16 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Plus, Zuckerberg doesn't feel pain. He doesn't feel anything.

[–] WetBeardHairs 11 points 2 years ago (2 children)

What if Zuckerberg just unhinges his jaw and swallows Musk whole? I hope the ref doesn't interfere.

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[–] orclev 6 points 2 years ago

Ultimately it doesn't matter, it's a win all around as they both need a good ass kicking. I'd cheer every punch no matter who threw it because the one receiving it deserves it.

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[–] Waitwuhtt 17 points 2 years ago (2 children)

My money is on the Zuck, he's got that BJJ and Elon looks like a chicken nugget.

[–] fritter 10 points 2 years ago

Zuck's gonna tear him apart; he's got that android strength.

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[–] kat 17 points 2 years ago (1 children)

The first time I saw this headline I thought it was from one of those Onion offshoot websites and skimmed it over. I can't believe it's real, but I'm both delighted and dumbfounded that it is!

I choose to believe they're doing this for our entertainment. Out of the goodness of their hearts. Things have been rough lately and we all need a little silliness and fun. Thanks, guys!

[–] guyman 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I think there was a weird reddit post awhile back where a guy saw Mark in his karate class. I dunno, rich people are people too and I guess this is a win-win for both of them. They get to live their rich lives, and it's a spectacular publicity stunt.

[–] scutiger 5 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Zuckerberg has actually been winning BJJ competitions.

[–] Cinner 10 points 2 years ago

Musk has a LOT more weight on him and I believe some height too.

I just want to see Elon's jibblies jobbling all over the place. Flippity flappity I want to see this happity.

[–] half 16 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Why's everybody seething with rage? This is hilarious. It's easy to get bent out of shape when the flaws of powerful people have a disproportionate effect on others, but those flaws are, in themselves, an indication that the humanity has not yet been completely purged from industrialized society.

Okay, you hate the rich. I understand, but we've been dealing with them since we noticed that grain grows better on certain land, and we'll be stuck dealing with them until individuals can freely convert matter and energy. Okay, these guys are egomaniacal man babies. They're taking it out on each other! Honestly, would you rather they resolved their differences and cut a deal to (further) integrate Meta and Twitter? Let them fight.

[–] kat 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I like this attitude and I agree! It's your turn to be here for our entertainment, silly rich manbabies. Dance for us!

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[–] Holyginz 16 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Hopefully they off each other.

[–] Eldritch 3 points 2 years ago

Yes because with any other scenario no matter who wins we lose.

[–] Seven 14 points 2 years ago

I ate the news. Thought this was the onion...

[–] FringeTheory999 13 points 2 years ago

They’re just jealous that the squashed billionaires are hogging all the headlines.

[–] MushuChupacabra 12 points 2 years ago (11 children)

I dislike both men for the net harm that they've inflicted on humanity.

But if this actually went down, Mark Zuckerberg would beat the brakes off of Elon Musk.

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[–] ooterness 11 points 2 years ago (2 children)

If the pay-per-view stream of the fight doesn't include a stock ticker for their respective companies, I will be deeply disappointed.

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[–] aggelalex 11 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] telllos 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] surewhynotlem 7 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Two billionaires enter, zero leave

[–] puppetx 4 points 2 years ago (3 children)
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[–] dangblingus 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Oh hey look everyone! Elon Musk is doing a thing! Let's give him the attention he so desperately craves as a man-child who never had to work a day in his life.

[–] Psychonaut1969 3 points 2 years ago

Loving #SpaceKaren on mastadon lol

[–] adriator 9 points 2 years ago

I'd rather watch this than Mayweather vs Pacquiao.

[–] croobat 8 points 2 years ago

Let's close the loser's platform

[–] krayj 8 points 2 years ago

As much as I hate the notion of giving either of these dbags money, I'm paying to see this fight.

[–] ChekhovsGum 8 points 2 years ago

These two guys together in the same room would create a negative charisma black hole

[–] SuperBobby 7 points 2 years ago

I'm down if it's a fight to the death.

[–] STUPIDVIPGUY 6 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Why people mad? Men have been fighting for all of history, I'm excited to see the matchup. I don't like either of these guys so seeing one of em get beat up is a win for me.

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[–] EmergingDystopia 5 points 2 years ago

What the fuck is this world now lol?

[–] CreamDrippinHoles 4 points 2 years ago (2 children)

What does this do for them? Does it increase the users to their platforms? Do they make enough money for it not to seem like a drop in the bucket compared to their billions? What the fuck is the point?

[–] cedarmesa 5 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 year ago)
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[–] moog 4 points 2 years ago

why would anyone agree to fight an android. zucks gonna terminate him.

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