this post was submitted on 31 Aug 2023
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[–] gmtom 175 points 10 months ago (10 children)

You're gifted enough to cruise through the first few stages of your education without trying, so you forge an identity as "the smart kid" but never build up skills in learning or studying, so when you finally get to a level where your natural intelligence can't carry you anymore you can't keep up with the people who did learn those skills and you start to fail and lose your identity as the smart kid which causes you to break down because that'd how you defined yourself for so long..... or so I've heard.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 10 months ago (1 children)

That's the cost of designing education for the worst students.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 10 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (4 children)

This is actually the reason. Because there is no such thing as "natural intelligence". Not more than there is "natural strength". There are natural predispositions, yes, but what you get is function of what training effort you put in. Whether you realise, and/or like, putting effort into training your intelligence, is is another thing. So people who are "above average" were in a favorable environment that fostered their development without it feeling forced, or unnatural. And then, when the environment was replaced by the school's, it sadly didn't foster personal development anymore. I would argue we would need to redesign education, now that we have internet. We don't have to design courses around physical limits.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago

Because there is no such thing as "natural intelligence".

Weell, some children have it easier to comprehend stuff on the logical/abstract level than others. Which feeds their curiousity. Which trains their intelligence...

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[–] TheDoctorDonna 26 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I feel like you watched me grow up. For a long time I was smart enough to pick things up naturally, I was even offered to skip grades.

Then the math got complicated and I didn't know how to learn it. I went from being the smart kid to being the stupid one in remedial math. Being smart was all I had at that point, so when I "lost" that, I lost everything in my eyes. I was stupid and I was never going to be anything because of it.

I ended up getting my GED as an adult and I now have a promising career in insurance- so I didn't really lose everything, but when I was 15 it sure felt like I had.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 10 months ago

Excuse me, I resent being attacked at 5am on a Friday, tyvm.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago

Wow, that's exactly what I've... heard... too!

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[–] [email protected] 144 points 10 months ago (4 children)

I am good with knowing my deficiencies. What sucks is being told that they are my fault because I should be "smart enough to overcome them".

[–] [email protected] 47 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Agreed 100%, being a specialist in something always has led to someone taking a pot shot at your deficiencies.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 months ago

Or being a jack of all trades and getting potshots for not being an expert in everything just because you pick up the basics quickly.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago (1 children)

It's actually insane how many teachers and other education professionals waved me off with 'you're smart enough, just try harder' while I was obviously suicidally depressed and extremely dysfunctional. Having undiagnosed autism because I was a teenage girl in the '00s was fun.

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[–] menemen 93 points 10 months ago (2 children)

The guilt that "you could have done more with your life", despite being a successful engineer with a happy family.

[–] [email protected] 52 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

"Gurtaj is a principle software engineer at Google you know! You used to be the same grade in school. What happened?"

"Dad, I'm running a multimillion dollar startup right now"

"Tsk tsk"

[–] [email protected] 29 points 10 months ago

"with all that million dollar you still can't be a doctor, did you know your nephew could play violins blindfolded while performing a surgery when he was still 3 years old. What a disappointment"

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago

Meanwhile,

"Osrs is running a multimilion dollar startup you know! You used to be the same grade at school. What happened?"

"Dad, I'm a principle software engineer at Google right now!"

"Tsk tsk"

[–] Dkarma 10 points 10 months ago

Dude...fuck...are you me?

[–] [email protected] 64 points 10 months ago (1 children)

There's that joke about wearing regular clothes on Halloween to go as the "gifted kid", and when people ask what you're supposed to be you sigh and say you were supposed to be a lot of things.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago (4 children)

"I'm a homicidal maniac. They look just like everyone else."

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[–] [email protected] 61 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (10 children)

Let's be honest, most of us think we're in the blue zone, when we are probably in the red zone

[–] [email protected] 49 points 10 months ago (1 children)

No, people in the red zone think they're in the green zone.

[–] Dkarma 10 points 10 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Sometimes we wish that our impostors syndrome was true

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I had to do an official test along with a psychological examination for reasons when I was almost 18 years old, so I know at some point I was in the blue zone or above, but it doesn't really fucking matter when you have autism, a mood disorder and have been neglected by your parents so you never learned things like determination or frustration tolerance. I think I shaved a solid 10 IQ points off anyway from almost a decade of substance abuse issues, so now I'm just autistic and dysfunctional without the gifted part.

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[–] [email protected] 60 points 10 months ago (4 children)

I'm in this picture and it makes me keenly aware of what I could accomplish if I didn't just coast by

[–] [email protected] 22 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Go with what makes you happiest, most often more effort can lead to less rewards. Ultimately you have to find your comfort zone.

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[–] Squizzy 14 points 10 months ago

We all think we are there, it's not a good mentality. No judgement, I am with you

[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago

AscendedMeme.jpg: Being Dumb | Being Gifted | Being Just Smart Enough to Coast by Easily in life while enjoying it.

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[–] [email protected] 42 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I still suffer from this. Promising early start, intense self-confidence issues and depression by the end.

[–] shadowspirit 20 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Doubt is a sign of intelligence. Which can sometimes lead to confidence issues. Just try to keep things in perspective and not let doubt keep you from taking calculated risks. It's when we allow ourselves to become paralyzed that things regress. A lot of it is environment as well so there's no simple answer but I can assure you thet you're not alone.

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[–] [email protected] 36 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Fun fact: programs for gifted kids have historically been far more underfunded than programs for other exceptional students.

By the way, the euphemism of "exceptional children" pleases my autistic brain way more than any other word for Special Education students. It has all the compliment-sounding qualities of "Special Needs" but is even more literal than any previous euphemism. It literally means "kids that teachers need to make exceptions for"

[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

"Gifted" programs royally screwed my education. I had huge gaps in my knowledge because they decided that being top percentile in reading/writing (and being the weird kid) meant I could just skip out on classes for special little weird classes or sit with higher grade classes. I just had ADHD btw and really liked to read. Anyway, I would LOVE to know wtf they thought they were doing moving a kid around that much in 3rd-5th. I suffered the hardest with math. I was missing bits and pieces, which is pretty gd important in math, and I'd still somehow get the answers right but talked to about my overly complicated or ✨creative✨ solutions lol. Even now I hide my work if I need to solve something because I'm probably doing it weird... Then later it was really fun finding out that I couldn't really live up to being "gifted". 0/10 being special made me less educated.

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (5 children)

This is funny, but even the most intelligent people are inflicted with this. Don't let it keep you down, we cannot be good at everything.

Its been consistently self-reported by Harvard students. And another effect is present, too - excellence leads to being placed in competitive environments, where everyone else is just as excellent. And this can make brilliant people feel stupid.

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[–] twelvefloatinghands 33 points 10 months ago

There is no green region. It's blue all the way up.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Ah, I see the stereotype of everyone thinking of themselves as "lazy genius" is something we've carried over from Reddit. We're all above average intelligent and could really achieve something if we just bothered to work hard and apply ourselves!

lol

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[–] [email protected] 30 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (4 children)

Did you know that 80% of people think they're above average intelligence?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I think a good part of that is because 'average human' is not a good way to represent who we are individually. I'm probably above average at specific things but in many other respects I'm average or below or wherever I'm supposed to be. Maybe most people are above average even though on average most of us are average.

Fully above average people IMO are like astronauts and stuff. We all live in the shadow of that former navy seal/doctor/astronaut who is like 45 or some crazy shit.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago (2 children)

This really depends on the distribution. If some or all of the people in that bottom 20% are very, very stupid it could actually work out that 80% are above average, because the average is being pulled down by the people at the bottom.

This is why we have different averages like mean, median, mode, and RMS because they each give you different interpretations of the raw data. For example the mean electro motive force of the grid is around 0 volts because it spends as much time in the negative as the positive. We use RMS here because negative numbers become positive when squared.

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[–] RQG 27 points 10 months ago (11 children)

Being gifted only refers to intelligence most of the time. But intelligence alone won't make a person excel at their field. You can be among the most intelligent people but still stay in the blue zone.

I think excellence comes to be when intelligence meets motivation, purpose, creativity, social skills or other factors.

And when it comes to the blue zone resilience would be a key factor. If one is intelligent of course you realize your faults quicker as well. However it takes resilience to keep going in the face of your own doubt.

That's why in the real world people who are very convinced of themselves and their own ideas will get far even if not gifted at all.

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I wish my iq was 20 higher or lower, idk just gimme out of the blue zone

[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago (3 children)

I get what you mean… though, I feel like an IQ test is a biased test, I took one as a teenager and scored high. Which was a morale boost at the time, but a few months later I had medical problems and ended up having a stroke and had to basically start all over with speech, motor and memory.

Sure, I survived. But I went through every therapy, started back up and realized I wasn’t close to what I was before. Which was crushing, sure I knew it wouldn’t be the same and I’m still above average, but the latent memories of my capabilities before constantly haunt me.

I didn’t mean to depress anyone, just enjoy the blue zone if at all possible. I constantly try remembering, it can get worse. /hug

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago (2 children)

The older I get the more I profoundly identify with Cypher. Ignorance truly is bliss.

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[–] ClockNimble 22 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Fun fact about being in that green region: Don't! It's like being in the blue region, but green!

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[–] GCanuck 20 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Who wants to bet that most commenters will place themselves in the blue zone?

Thankfully I can look down on everyone as I’m firmly at the top of that curve.

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[–] Baba_booey1 18 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Getting mature early is a curse

Cuz you are left with a wee little tolerance for biased thoughts and advices

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Awareness of your own weaknesses is the first step to make them your strengths.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Yes, this is funny, but anyone worth knowing in a PhD program will quote Hawkings at you if you take the green part too seriously.

"Only losers brag about their IQ."

Or Thomas Edison (and yes, he was actually a decent engineer before he realized how much easier it is to just own a company)

"Great accomplishments depend not so much on ingenuity as on hard work."

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I don't mind being aware of everything, but I do mind that nobody else is

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